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First Mushroom Experience: Unsettling
Intense First Trip
So, first off, at the time of this trip, I was in high school. It was my freshmen year and I had never experienced a "trip" before. I had really wanted to trip but never could find a time to. Then, one day in school a friend of mine came up to me and said he would be having some people over that weekend and that some people would be getting mushrooms, and of course I was interested. being my first time, I decided to get about 3 grams. I do not know the strain, but they were pretty strong according to some friends of mine, who were experienced trippers. little did i know, I would be in for a night of surprise. In the weeks following up to this trip I had done a lot of research on psycoactive drugs such as lsd, dmt and mushrooms. I had read many trip reports and heard many stories about people's experiences on psycadelics, and not all of them were good. This knowledge and anticipation would be crucial in shaping my mindset for my trip.
The Day of...
Today, it was a cool fall morning in my quaint little town, and I got dropped off at the football field to watch the game, this was my way of getting into town, and I told my parents i would be meeting up with some friends after the game and would be spending the night at one of their houses. My parents seemed unconcerned with what i would be doing, which was odd for them, but I didnt really think anything of it. After the game, I headed off to the park in town to meet up with some buddies whom I would be tripping with. It was about 11 as I strolled into the park, ready for a day in the haze of some bud, some beer, and some mushrooms. When I got there, I immediately saw some people I knew, and we sat down to pack my nice new bubbler. I had about a quarter ounce on me that day, so I had enough bud for a good day. Soon after smoking with these guys, I met up with the group I would be tripping with. Mind you, my first mistake was tripping with these people at all, because they were merely aquaintences, not really good friends of mine, so i didn's have a built up trust in them; this comes in later as a crucial factor of my trip. After meeting up with this group, I soon got my hands on my shrooms, but was waiting to take them until later. By about 4, I was ready to trip, and by that time I had already had about 6 or 7 beers, and smoked a considerable amount of weed, so I was feeling good going into the trip.
I ate the Shrooms after meeting up with a kid I had never really talked to before, but he was experienced with shrooms and I felt trusting towards him. He told me I would begin to feel nauscious, and would start yawning. Soon i felt the trip coming on, and my empty stomach started to rumble. I began to yawn, and so the trip begins. A.J., the kid mentioned above, took a group of us to a trail he said was fun to walk when we were tripping, so we all were excited with this idea. There were three of us tripping, and then there was AJ, who was sober. I started to experience some nice visuals as I waled into the woods, following AJ. the fall leaves started to glisten and change colors, they flashed with yellows, oranges, reds, and greens. by this time, i was enveloped in the trip, and no thoughts of a bad trip arose. AJ led us to this spot, a rocky shore of the large creek that ran through our town, where we sat down. I took out my bag of shrooms and finished off the few caps and scrounge left in the bag, as AJ had instructed. I felt that he was my guide, and my mind portrayed him as an elder, as if he was an old, wise man with all the answers. we smoked another bowl on this little rocky shore, and then continued on our walk through the woods.
The Turning Point...
Up until now, it may seem like a good trip right? , but it changed from here on out. it was starting to get dark, and suddenly my phone rang. with great difficulty, I took my phone out of my pocket. I was nervous. Who could be calling? When was I meeting up with my friend whom I was staying the night with? I began to ask myself these questions. As I pulled my phone from my pocket, I saw it was my friend Jarrod. He told me that I could no longer stay the night at his house because he thought I would alert his mom that i was not in a sober state of mind. This was alarming. My mind was rushed with feelings of anxiety and panic. What would i do? where would i go? I couldnt call my parents because of the obvious fact... I was Tripping on mushrooms! For sure they would know something was up. I chose to go back to the park and see if I could crash at anyone's house. As I walked back to the park, I was nervous, but I tried to push that out of my mind. The next hour i have no recollection of what happened. The next thing I remember was sitting on the bench next to the basketball court with about 20 people around me, looking down at me. I felt as if they had all turned on me, their voices were loud, it seemed as if they were circling me, pummeling me with questions, but in truth, they were all silent. I was the one asking questions. or was i? i couldnt tell if i was speaking out loud or if it was just my thoughts. I began to panic. Why was i here? Why did i exist? Who am I? What is my name? Do i have a name? Where should i go? Will i get caught? These were the questions my mind was asking me. For the next 20 minutes, what seemed like an eternity, I debated with my own mind. I felt as if there was two of me, debating over what I should do that night. As the debate got louder and louder, more intense, more overwhelming, i was interrupted by someone shouting my name. They said " Chris, hey Chris we gotta go! we gotta go man C'mon man". I stopped, turned quickly to see that it was actually another kid, calling another Chris. My mind didnt care. I began to walk toward the kid calling. I walked to his car, asked him frantically for a ride home, I didnt even know who he was. I was frantic as he drove off into the night. I went back to the bench, debating again. What should I do? Where should I go? Who am I? Why am i here?...........it escalated....louder...louder....SNAP! I got up, and proclaimed to the rest of the group " Im going home".
I lived 6 miles away, and I knew damn well it was going to be a long walk, but I didnt care. I stormed out of the park, still tripping hard, controlled by instinct, fear. As I walked, all I could think about was the safety of home, the warmth of my bed. I thought of the constance of home. I wanted to be somewhere i knew was safe, or at least this is what my instict wanted. I walked through the dark, the cold, it was about 40 degrees and all i had on was a sweatshirt and windpants. I dont know why but suddenly, on this back country road, I vered into a field where I stumbled and eventually lied down. It was a full moon, there was plenty of light so I could see where I was going. I lied there, thinking. suddenly, I started messing with the gum in my mouth. I dont know why, but I was pulling it apart with my hand. It was sticky, it got all over my hand and it seemed to engulf my whole body, I held my hand up to the moon. I felt as if i was sinking into a gob of bubble gum, drowning in it.
I woke up, still in the field, I had dosed off for about 10 or 15 minutes. I got my shit together, and continued the walk. It had been a long day. I still didnt know where I would sleep, or where I would go. I remembered my weed, so I stepped into a hedgerow, packed a bowl, and toked. It was nice. It was a comfort after such an intense trip. When I arrived home I opened my garage, got into my moms car, and slept in the back seat. I didnt know what I would tell her in the morning when she found me in the car but I was home, and I was safe.
For all you people who want to trip, I encourage it, but you must be sure you are ready. since this experience I have had many great experiences, spiritually i have been changed by my experiences with mushrooms, but you must keep these things in mind,
1. Set: you must have a good mindset going into a trip, dont trip unless you feel comfortable and safe.
2. Setting: Always trip in a safe place, learn from bad experiences of others and trip with people you trust.
3. Anticipation: Do not go into a trip anticipating anything, do not try to compare psycadelic experiences with other drugs, just go with the flow, dont fight it, you'll lose.
Hope you guys gained something from this, at least a laugh if anything else. Have a nice trip!
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