My first bad trip

I've done shrooms probably about 4 or 5 times in the span of a year and a half, so I'm still relatively new to the whole experience. the first couple of times I did shrooms all I did was laugh and play video games with a couple of friends and relax and enjoyed the whole experience. The 4th time I did shrooms it was nothing more than a body buzz and some giggles (I took 2g's my first time and 2.5 every other time) The first time I did mushrooms I also witnessed my friend have a bad trip, I was playing gears of war and she started freaking out. I killed a "Locust" in the game (it felt so real because of the sound system my buddy had, every time I blew someone to pieces I had to pause the game and catch my breath lmao) and this is where it got bad, it got so bad that she just started staring at the ground and saying "I want to go home" so my buddy drove her home. We were all laughing when he got back and were all trying to imagine what she had seen, ever since then I've wanted to experience what a bad trip was really like. You know that saying "be careful what you wish for"? Follow it. What I experienced, I would never wish upon my worst enemy.

Just a little backround info on me before we get started

I'm 19 years old, and I'm a kid who enjoys a little bit of "self-destruction" I used to call it "experimenting" just to make it sound nicer, but really, I just wanted to get fucked up all the time. I've experimented with Dextramethorphan (DXM) some painkillers, and Shrooms, I have yet to get ahold of LSD but am excited to try!

So fast forward to last night.

Time of Ingestion: 4:00pm
Time of soberness: 9/10pm



I'm gonna refer to the person who I was tripping with as "D". D called me up and told me he got paid that day and asked me if I could find someone who has shrooms (D had never done shrooms before) so I texted the guy I know and "placed my order" little did I know I was in for a VERY bumpy ride that night.

When D arrived at my house we walked 30 minutes to go and meet up with "my guy" when we got there the deal went nice and smooth although something felt a little off when I saw D hand my guy the money, but I just ignored the feeling. After a long walk back home we started eating them right away. I've picked up off this guy 2 times now and had a general Idea of what my experience would be like because I had adjusted to the shrooms he had (or so I thought). The shrooms this time were not "little chips" or dust but rather Large chunky stems. D and I both ate 3g's each, but RIGHT when I bit into mine, I for some reason knew right away that these were "very good shrooms" just because when I bit into mine it was still "thick" and ummm not dried up to a crisp. they hit me almost instantly, 20 minutes and I'm already feeling dizzy and laughing and seeing my walls breathe (which I'm accustomed too) but this time I had an extremely sick feeling to my stomache, so I decided to make some green tea, I also made a pizza for D and I. D was fine, just a little giggly, it wasn't really affecting him yet, he said "hey man I heard weed calms you down when you trip on shrooms" and he's right (at least that's what I personally believe in cuz it does help a tad for me) so I called another guy I knew and asked for a gram, it wasn't until I was about to head out and pick it up when D Realized he accidently gave my shroom guy 50$ instead of 30$. So we had no money at this time (I was broke, okay) so I told my weed guy that I'd call him again later when we get some money and apologized. This is where things got funky. I called my shroom guy and asked about the extra 20$ and he said he did have it and he'd give it back. So before D and I went back out I took the pizza out of the oven and Made my Green tea, I didn't even want to touch the pizza, in fact I forced myself to try and eat some but honestly I was to disgusted to eat it and just spat it out, I fucking LOVE pizza I don't know why that happened. I decided to take a mug of green tea with me out on our journey back to the "meeting spot" we had picked up at earlier, and D decided to take the whole pizza and walk with it (although he finished it in 5 minutes like a crazy mofo). Right when I stepped outside, I knew the date was December 21'st (the supposed end of the world date) and because I was getting higher by the minute I decided to give my friend (whom I really really appreciate in life) a call, it went to voicemail because she was working but I left her a message along the lines of "hey, just felt like calling you and wanted to let you know I think you're Beautiful, and I hope you have a good night" I thought hey why not yknow? If the world does end at least I'll make one person smile.

It started to get dark, real fast as we were walking back to the "meet" spot, this half hour walk felt like 3 hours I swear. My buddy had to stop a couple of times and had to sit down, he kept losing his composure and couldn't stay "himself" so I had to be the babysitter, but I was also tripping balls. The only thing I really cared about the entire journey was his mentality and safety, He was my responsibility, it was his first time tripping, so I had to make sure he was alright, I forgot to look out for myself, which is where things took a turn for the worse. The whole journey D and I felt extremely Nauseous, when we finally met up with My guy, he gave me the money back to D and we sat there and talked for a minute, He made sure D was alright and calmed him down a bit, I then asked for a smoke and he gave one to me, I began to smoke it, I felt extremely relaxed and calm for about a minute while talking with him, he knew we were tripping hard but wasn't worried about me which was fine, because I wasn't worried about myself either. I then took a few steps and felt like vomiting, I was always afraid of vomiting on shrooms because people always say they feel like they are dying. I began the purging process, my jaw VIIOLENTLY cracked each time I almost puked. I managed to hold it in, all teary-eyed and whatnot I look back up at D and my guy and say "fuck, sorry, I'm cool" and continued walking, at this point I started tripping MAD hard. As D and I were walking back the road became Clustered with cars, like a traffic jam and the wind was blowing against us, it was snowing as well so it was pretty damn cold, I kept almost throwing up a couple of times but managed to hold it in, my jaw still violently cracking each time, the only thing that came to mind was my Ex whenever I almost threw up, she always told me whenever she would vomit her jaw would crack and that it would hurt. I had recently went through a breakup, and was dealing with some emotional stuff, yknow, typical kid who grew up too fast kinda shit. My emotions started to overwhelm me, all I could think about was love and the people I've disappointed, I basically wish I had never met these certain people just so they wouldn't have to deal with the pain that I unintentionally made them feel.

While we were walking back was when D and I Peaked. D was tripping so hard he was tripping. he just could not keep it together, so I had to do the whole arm around the head thing and basically hold him up the whole way back. My shroom guy is a very spiritual person it seems, he was talking to me about how he was going to have a "end of the world" party and that he was going to have it on a big green hill so they could see the stars and moon and stuff, only reason i'm telling you this is because It started to make me wonder if the world really was ending...think about it, when we left it was practically daytime and sunny, by the time we were going back, it was dark, snowing alot, extremely windy and there was a traffic jam and horns going off everywhere. So I then started questioning what I had heard from my guy, did he say "the world is ending by the way, I'm going to have a party on a big hill"? I decided to ignore it and just say "haha I'm just trippin". D was freaking out and almost crying as we were walking back and I was trying to comfort him the whole time, I took off my jacket and gave it to him, I again did not care for myself whatsoever, all I cared about was his "survival" so to speak. As we got closer to my house we stopped at a Tim Hortans to dry off, this is where the idea of an apocalypse jumped into my head, the traffic jam, Timmies was full of people (like a shelter) D felt like he was dying, the weather was scary, all these factors made up the scenario of an "ice age coming forth" into my head, I didn't freak out but realized that there was always a possibility. At this point I did not want to think about it, but no matter what I tried to do, I kept over-thinking everything, I started thinking about survival scenarios and ways to survive, I also thought I was never going to come back to reality because of this traumatizing experience (yes it was traumitizing) my mind began to play intense tricks on me, I would see cars pull out of driveways in reverse when really they were going forward, I saw figures Morph together and create "imaginary men" which kept popping up in random places (like the whole Slenderman Internet craze) I truly thought I wasn't going to come out of this one, only because I thought my mind wouldn't be able to "fix" itself because of "the trauma" when we got back inside it just made alot of things worse at first, my mom was at the top of the stairs and looked worried as fuck. I asked her what was wrong and begged her to stop making that "worried" face because it was freaking me out, she then told me my brother and her got into a little fight but that was all, I then decided to calm down and lay on the couch, so did D, but all that was going on in my head was "Will I return back to normal?"  At this point it had only been 2 hours, so I had to wait a joyous 3 or 4 hours for it to wear off (hopefully, I thought) by this time D was loving life, he was cozy, wrapped in blankets and just talking about anything, he was happy to be alive he said, he said he felt like he was literally dying outside.

I think what really drove me "insane" in this scenario was the fact that I was tripping the hardest I had ever tripped in my life, and had to maintain a "sober" composure along the way home to make sure we wouldn't get pulled over by cops or something. I think that's what put the idea of me being insane in my head, the fact that I was "acting normal" the whole time to ensure my friends safety, all I could think about was that friend I really really like and kept thinking that I'd just be disappointing her as well if I didn't make it through this. This was such a bad Experience I'll never forget, it was truly eye opening! On top of that, my friend gave me an ecstacy Pill to save for later, I flushed that shit down the toilet as soon as I got home. I'll never forget this experience and I did my best to make light out of it, I don't wish that upon my worst enemy. That definately was some scary shit. Stay indoors if the weather is crap kids.

Oh by the way The green Tea Mug was tossed. lmfao.