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complete loss of ego
What I experienced today is beyond true explanation. I went on a journey with two of my best friends, and I experienced something I wasn't even looking for.
Ingestion: 4 grams dried
15 minutes later I start to come up. I'm slightly surprised because it has taken much longer previously. We all discuss our strange feeling bodies. After this point, time did not exist, and I have no idea the span of time that I was feeling these things, so I'll describe it as it happened.
While coming up, I started to have cool visuals--my favorite part of tripping. The molding around the walls and windows started to move back and forth. All the frames and pictures started blending together. I was having fun. My two friends were giggling beside me and suddenly I realized things were happening fast. The sound of their voices was too much for me to handle and I just felt like I needed to be alone. I asked if I could lay in my friend's bed for a minute because I needed a second to process what was happening.
By this point, my body is like jello and I feel like my "self" and my body are two different things. I felt like my body lagged behind my consciousness. Things were happening quickly and I was seeing fast moving geometric shapes and colors everywhere I looked.
I laid down.
As I closed my eyes, I tried to talk myself through what was happening. "I'm good, this is just a little intense. Everything is so beautiful, I don't need to be scared" I was seeing red geometric shapes whirling together and moving around with my eyes closed.
I opened my eyes and look up. The ceiling moves away from the ceiling fan and spirals come down towards me, as if the world is saying, welcome home! I'm scared, but trying to embrace it. I look around and see the crazy shapes coming out of the walls and decide, today, I'm along for the ride.
I go out into the living room and realize that I'm losing touch with reality. My body was disconnected from my soul and the universe I was in was very strange. I felt like I had unlocked a portal into my own subconscious. I had access to dreams that I could choose to remember vividly. I was becoming one with the universe.
Suddenly the room I was in was unfamiliar. It was a place of light and beauty. We tried to describe it, and we decided that the world we were in was as if someone was looking through the looking glass. We were in our own world.
Everything was so amazingly beautiful. Colors whirled together and danced along with the music. The music, the colors, the auras, my best friends...we were all connected. Suddenly everything became clear. I can't explain what happened because there are no words, but here is my attempt...
I experienced infinity.
I remember thinking when I was a kid about going to heaven and trying to wrap my brain around the idea of infinity. What is it like to know no end in time? It would make me panic.
Today, I experienced what I imagine infinity to be. I said during the trip "this must be what heaven is like." Loss of self. Total connection with the universe. Time became something that us mortals used to measure things, but it really had no meaning. I experienced the past, the present, and the future at the same time. I felt like I was in a world where certain people belong, and suddenly I was excited. "We're in this world together"
I then began to imagine all the people who have been in this world before. It was a universe accessed by few, but cherished by all who make it there. A portal within our own minds that takes us to a point of transcendence. Total unity with the universe around us. It was one of the most amazing things I've ever experienced in my entire life.
After my acceptance with the fact that we were in a different world, I sat and took it in as an active passenger. It was a beautiful experience.
The visuals, the music, the out of body experience...words cannot describe the beauty of it all. I feel blessed to have experienced something so magical.