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Psilocybin Mushrooms: Truly Entheogenic
Psilocybin Mushrooms. Truly ENTHEOGENIC in every sense of the word.
Prior to this experience, I had taken LSD a total of 16 times, with a average dose being at 4 hits, with 7 being my highest dose, which was one HELL of a ride. Needless to say, I had a plethora of Psychedelic Experience prior to this, but NOTHING could have prepared me for the magic that is 4-HO-DMT.
Set & Setting:
At my house, In my room, white walls pretty much bare as can be, nothing fancily psychedelic for me to stare at. Dosing at approximately 12:30-1:00 A.M. on a Saturday Night. (Huge Mistake not decorating prior to the experience, haha!)
I strongly believe to this day that the way I prepped the mushrooms for consumption had a major part to play in the reasoning behind why the experience was so powerful. Upon doing research regarding the most efficient way for my body to retain the largest amount of Psilocin, I stumbled upon information stating the powdering of the Mushrooms prior to consumption would eliminate a large amount of the troubles my stomach would have to go through during stage of digesting the Mushrooms. Now that I had chosen my preferred method of consumption, I went upstairs to my cabinet that held the coffee cups after my family had gone to sleep, pulled out my bag of Mushrooms, and proceeded to then pop the caps in there, grinding them to a fine powder. I had initially planned to place the powder into a cup of orange juice, stir it up while in the glass, and drink a murky concoction of Powdered Mushroom orange juice.
Needless to say, it didn't work! To much dismay, the mushroom powder sat on top of the orange juice, and wouldn't mix in much at all! Of course, I was not going to let that stop me. With inspiration from the great psychonauts and shamans of the past, and my brothers in my band and my Psychedelic group of friends, I was not going to let this stop me. With little pleasure and much dismay, I drank the foul mixture, gagging each step of the way, for the grotesque taste of the powdered Psilocybin Mushroom creating a "Cinnamon Challenge"-esque nastiness in the consistency of the foul brew I had concocted proved quite the challenge to take in. After about 15 minutes, I had finished the awful tasting brew, now all I had to do was relax, and wait for the roller coaster ride of my life.
I had been so eager to try Mushrooms. I had a feeling they were going to be very impacting on me. I was the last in my psychedelic group of friends to try Psilocybin Mushrooms. All of us had taken lots of LSD together before, but in a strange series of events, all ended up having our first psilocybin experiences be personal trips.
After Ingestion, I laid down and talked to my fellow psychonauts who had just recently had their first Psilocybin Experiences. I told them that I had eaten them, how I was feeling, what albums I was going to be listening to, and things of that nature. As the first wave of euphoria entered, I proclaimed to my fellow psychonauts how I loved mushrooms so far, and proclaimed how if it was going to make me feel like this, it was "Better than LSD". Now that the Mushrooms were coming on, I started the first album of the night, the Beatles Album "Love" George and Giles Martin (The Producer of The Beatles' Music and his son)'s remix-and mash-up of great Beatles songs. The album started beautifully, like an event, and I was anxiously excited like a child, with front-row seats to the spectacular I was about to watch unfold.
The album starts of with the song "Because", and it's entrancing harmonies felt and sounded more mystically magical then they had ever seemed. By the time I had got to "I Am The Walrus" (Track 5 Of 27), I knew I was in for a ride. The Mysticism of "Gnik Nus" entranced me even further, leading into "Something". It was during "Something" (Track 9 of 27) that I first started to tear up. I had Shamanic Ecstasy knocking at my door, creeping up at me, waiting to take grasp of my soul with all its might. The album progressed, the feeling crept on, increasing with all its might as each track progressed. Finally, we come ever closer to the scene of the Cosmic Orgasm; The O.B.E. Track 24 of 27 comes on, a beautiful composition by the name of "A Day In The Life". By this point, my happiness is exploding from inside of me. I have already cried tears of joy, but nothing could prepare me for the otherworldly happiness I was about to be brought.
If any of you are Beatle fans out there, you may recognize what I'm talking about when I talk about the Orchestral Crescendo in "Day In The Life", right before it switches to Paul's part. That right there is where my OBE happens. The Crescendo starts, and I slowly slip out of my body. I am no longer in my room. I am watching my life flash before my eyes. My future successes with my band, the wondrous times I have to come, pure joy and enlightenment, showing me what I can achieve if I truly push myself to strive to my full potential, believe in myself and my dream, and never give up. What a beautiful, overwhelming sight this is to me. Never before did any substance I had ever taken move me to TEARS. I was BAWLING MY EYES OUT, tears of pure joy and happiness like I had never experienced before. True Shamanic Ecstasy in every sense of the words. I was so happy, and the experience was so entheogenic in a religious aspect, I was YELLING "SATAN YOU FOOL, SATAN YOU FOOL, YOU ARE NOTHING COMPARED TO GOD". To this day I do not know how I did not get caught that night.
Anyways, if any of you are Beatle fans out there, you will know what I mean when I say I came back into my body at the last chord of the song. This places my total "Out-Of-Body-Time" at roughly 2 minutes and 45 seconds. I am completely astonished upon return. All I can think is "What the fuck just happened, that was BEAUTIFUL". I had never had an OBE like that before. I had experienced intense moments of beauty on LSD before, that I would call OBE's, but they were OBE's on a completely different level, not in potency but subjectively, on more of what I would call a phenethylamine-style OBE.
Part 2: Entering The Realms Of Insanity
I finish the album, and now I have to piss. I get up to take a piss, and quickly realize, I AM TOO FUCKED UP TO WALK. The thought of that scares me, as I have NEVER been tripping so hard where I couldn't walk! I mean, even on 7 HITS I could walk! Floored, but could walk! So I stumble out of bed, somehow make it to my door. As I open my door, my entire world goes to the colors gray, black, and white, and slowly moves from side to side, wiggling. I just think "OHHHH FUCK". I consider turning back into my bedroom, and then decide against it, for the urge to piss is too bad. I stumble like a baby learning to walk to my bathroom, open the door, and turn the light on. My eyes are as big as moons! I've never EVER seen my pupils this large, for they almost are encompassing my entire eye! I open my toilet seat to piss, and it DOUBLES in size. I close my toilet seat, and it SHRINKS to 1/4 the size it was. I repeat this a few times, completely mindfucking myself, till I decide this game is too much, and to just piss in my huge toilet. After getting caught up in staring at the water flush, I close my toilet, and go stumble to my room.
As a side note, every time I entered my family room, which is the land between my room and the bathroom, my vision went gray, black, and white. Upon entering the bathroom, my vision was restored. But upon re-entering the family room, and going into my room, the colors in my vision once again left me. Strange.
My room is pitch black. I grab my iPod and try to put my headphones in and work the iPod, but my headphones are MELTING. Straight up MELTING so much, I can't even put them in my ears, because they are so disfigured to my sight. After countless tries, I decide music isn't the best for me. I had set up Kingdom Hearts 2, the Final Boss Scene to play tripping on my PS2, so I turn the television on somehow and look at the screen. IMMEDIATELY I am turned off by it, knowing I am FAR TOO FUCKED UP to play that shit.
I realize I'm pretty much too fucked up to do anything but lie in my bed. Soon, that becomes a scary thought. I keep thinking of how fucked up I am. I thought, "I am too fucked up" "What is going on?" "What is happening to me?"
Somewhere along the line, I conclude that insanity is what is happening to me. Thoughts begin to race at 100,000 mph, faster than they've ever raced before. I am PROFUSELY sweating, my hands are extremely clammy, my shirt is drenched in sweat, and my tears of joy turn to tears of fear. I think to myself, "Will I ever be sane again?"
At this point, I conclude my answer is no. I am crying tears of FEAR. I keep picturing myself trying to be a functioning member of society in this state. Picturing myself in daily situations, at school, in public, etc. Picturing myself trying to pretend that I am a normal human being when in reality I am insane.
Being a Christian, (Not a crazy Evangelist though, haha!) I, in my primitive state know that I can now only turn to God for hope. I begin a 3-hour prayer, BEGGING for forgiveness, BEGGING to be sane again, BEGGING for my vision to get restored, just begging to be normal me again. At the darkest points in this trip, I lose my vision entirely. I am not kidding when I say this. I go blind temporarily. I have no fucking clue how this happened, as this must have been a spiritual thing rather than an actual effect of the mushrooms. But whatever it was, it happened. I had to piss for about an hour now, but I was still much too fucked up to even walk, but this urge to piss was so strong, I really felt like I was going to piss my pants in my bed. I prayed to God that I wouldn't do that, and still continued my prayer to make me sane again.
Before I knew it, BAM. I snapped out of it. I knew it immediately that I was back. All I could say was "What the fuck just happened to me"? I was still getting visuals when I came back, which is a huge part of what makes me believe God did help me come back also with the assistance of the Mushroom's effects actually wearing off. I turned my body over, and for some reason, there was a huge stuffed animal Orangutan in my room that my little brother won at Dave & busters. I think I had put it in there to stare at while tripping, I can't remember. Anyways, I got up, walking/standing for the first time without problem in 6 hours, and gave it big hug. Never before was I so happy to be alive. I was even hugging my walls. I finally could walk to take a piss, so I did exactly that.
Wait, WHAT IS THAT GROWING IN MY SINK?!
When I made the concoction, after powdering
the Mushrooms, I had only washed the coffee grinder out with water, and poured
the water in my sink. I forgot I was dealing with FUNGI, one of the most
rapidly spreading things on planet earth! Fungus had started to grow in my
sink, on the sink handle, and even spreading to the cabinet below a bit. I
FREAK OUT. WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MY DAD?! HOW AM I GOING TO EXPLAIN
Or, was I JUST TRIPPING COMPLETE SACK, AND WAS HALLUCINATING THE GROWTH OF LIVE FUNGUS IN MY SINK?!?!
I’m not entirely
sure, but by this time, it was 6:45 A.M. BRAIN BLAST! LYSOL! On the bottle it
says "Kills 99.9% of Germs, Fungi etc.!" I grab two bottles of Lysol.
Polish them both off cleaning my sink and everything else, decontaminating my
bathroom. I could hear my sister and dad's alarm's going off to wake them up to
get ready for 8 O'clock mass as I clean. I am nervous as hell. My pupils are
still as big as the moon. I finish cleaning. I have literally a garbage bag
full of cleanup towels, cups and spoons I used to mix the concoction, etc.
filled to the brim, hidden in my room. I successfully finish cleaning in time.
Reveling in my success, I finally take a moment to relax, and listen to a calming
tune. It is now Sunday Morning. Fittingly, I listen to "Sunday
Morning" by The Velvet Underground. Never more have I been so happy to be
a sane, living human being.
I am so religiously happy right now, regardless of caring about the fact that my dad is soon to be awake, I shower, I WANT to go to church out of respect for God. I figure none of the beauty I saw would come true if I didn't go. I felt it was the least I could do in return to God because he saved me from insanity.
I finished showering, and miraculously, my father, nor sister or brother, are awake yet. I enter my room, post on facebook what I learned in two sentences, the first being the most important.
"All you need is Love."
"No matter how strange it seems, all of it's a dream,
No matter how far I go, I'll be comin' home, somehow."
The trip did end, and I ended up being fine, and I am fine today, currently still using psychedelics for all the right reasons, spiritually and for the betterment of oneself, and enjoying the perks of musical inspiration that go along with listening to the fantastic albums I hear to guide me through each trip! I consider that it took me 6 months to fully "recover", or for lack of better words, fully integrate the experience. Was it a hard trip? Yes. Do I regret it one bit? Never. And I never will.
4-HO-DMT is one of the finest entheogens we are ever so privileged to have on Planet Earth. It is one of the finest teachers mankind has the opportunity to enlighten himself with. Every time, Mushrooms will either gently show, or smack you in the face with the truth, whatever way the Mushroom and DMT feel you need to be shown the truth in a way that will allow you to retain it, that is the way you will receive it. If you are thinking about trying Psilocybin Mushrooms, by all means TRY THEM. I can't guarantee you that you will have an O.B.E. as beautiful as mine, and I certainly can't guarantee you that you will have a terrible time after you are shown they beauty like I did, but what I can guarantee you is that DMT is a beautiful thing which will always expose the truth about life and your inner human to you, and will ultimately make you a better person.
I hope my experience will fascinate, inspire, and enlighten others of the wondrous magic that lies within the Psilocybin Mushroom, 4-HO-DMT.
Peace & Much Love to you all.
P.S. - Sorry if there are any strange spelling errors in this report! (Blame it on Microsoft Word, aha!)