Connected trips

I've been consuming mushrooms for about 9 months now and in weekly two gram doses for a few months.

This is not a trip report so to say, but more of a recollection of different voyages and experiences that somehow began to connect and to have a same thread in them.

First of all the shrooms don't seem to have the closed eye visual effect on me any more, although at the beginning it was, for me, unbeliveable. They have taken another turn, but I'll come to that a bit later. 

It all started with a cactus of mine when he danced for the first time. He is around 25 years old, and I suspect he has some kind of awareness that is very strange to me, but never the less we talk. During our first communication while I was on mushrooms (after about five hours in the trip  when I thought it was over and went to sleep) I heard a strange sound and felt that my body was being torn apart and the sound was passing through the flesh and veins. While that was happening, I saw some kind of strains from the cactus coming to me and they took my brain, put it on the table and did something to it, then put it back. While that was happening the snake was consuming me and passing me through it's body (this was the first time snakes appeared in a vision, and they followed me ever since, appearing and "catapulting me" somewhere else, until they disappeared together with closed eye visuals). Then it was over and I fell to refreshing sleep.

From that time I started to consume mushrooms more often and the experience with the cactus didn't appear again until a bit later, but the snakes were a constant and they were beautiful and the feelings they brought with them were sometimes sexual in their nature (that's for another report).

Two months ago, experiences started to take another turn. I was on a 2 gram dose (never took more that 2.5 g) when something strange happened. Cactus was starting to awake from it's winter sleep and we started to communicate again but this time it was very different. I was looking at him while the peak was starting and he began to transform and to pull me in - it's hard to explain because there were no words left to describe it. All I knew is that it threw me somewhere different. It was like being born again and taking the first breath. After that I could only be a witness to what was happening... My eyes were open and everything was the same, but different. Then my body began to transform into many different things of which I only recognised a bird. There was no time, no space, no me as I am now.

A week after that it was a much milder trip, but the one that came after was different and somewhat scary (if only for a moment). Last four trips followed some kind of pattern.

First time it happened the onset came within 10 minutes, and the next two hours I cannot recall, but then I was awakened in a strange loop. Everything was the same except me. I was repeating the same actions, not knowing whether I'm smoking a cigarette, lying on a bed, sitting on a toilette, walking through myself, drinking water from a glass that never ran out of it. I couldn't find a connection with reality and was getting scared, slapping myself, but nothing happened. The only thing that was changing was a number of cigarettes I smoked so I began lighting them and putting them out while counting. When i counted to four, I was out of that state completely normal and euforic for the next four hours. 

A week later it happened again only this time there was no fear, and I came out slightly faster, but when I went back to the room, the cactus started to change and I was again transformed - only this time there were less transformations.

Last time I took mushrooms, the loop started very fast into the experience, but this time I knew what was going on, I laughed and went straight out. Then the shrooms started talking to me and some kind of warmth came down on me, I looked at the cactus - this time I controlled my eyes and when the transformation started I looked from him, and was transformed into a birdlike creature. What I saw I cannot describe.

Thank you for reading this, and maybe I'll post again in more detail because these aren't the only things that happened but I wrote only the thread of experiences the way they happened and the way they are connected.

Best wishes to you all!!

:)