The opportunity to have a profound spiritual LSD experience seemed to come to me and a friend of mine (who I will call B) on a perfect day (beautiful weather, no family plans, no obligations, etc. etc. etc.). After realizing the absolutely breathtaking potential of this beautiful substance after an experience about a month prior to this, I decided I wanted to see what kind of spectacular places it could take me by trying it again (this was my 10th time using LSD). A dealer in my area, who I will refer to as M, is reputable for having PHENOMENAL blotter. And by phenomenal, I mean one hit wonders. The majority of people who have taken even a single tab of this specific batch of acid reported decent visuals and wonderful euphoria, along with having difficulty speaking or even being able to carry out a full conversation. I had tried 2 of these wonderful tabs a month ago, and to say the least my mind was blown into oblivion. In other words, I got to the point where during the peak, my piss turned purple, objects literally breathed so heavily that they seemed to be literally pulsating 5 feet outward, and the entire sky became one enormous fractal. It also became difficult to realize what my own name was or what drug I was on for a solid 15-30 minutes of the trip (though it was nearly impossible to know if that was the amount of time that passed by). These effects were significantly more powerful than the effects of the ridiculous amount of liquid I consumed on my 18th birthday (3 drops plus I washed the remainder of a *nearly* empty vial out with water then drank the water).
I met up with B and 2 of my acquaintances who also wanted to fry and we drove ten minutes or so to pick up a 5 strip of this godliness. For 50 dollars, he handed my friend a 5-strip of very, very slightly perforated white blotter, which we actually ended up needing scissors to cut. This is where shit went in my favor completely unintentionally. When we cut up the 5 tabs, I was given 2 abnormally large pieces of blotter paper, definitely larger than the last time I picked up this batch of fluff. I didn't realize it at the time, but I would definitely find out in the next hour. Excited with our purchase, we decided to drive to the a beach, an extravagant place to do our dance with Lucy. Yes, one of the people I was with opted to stay sober just for a little while so he could drive. This kid and my other acquaintance didn't want to stay at the beach for too long.
Within 30 minutes, I knew something HUGE was about to happen. I had never felt this type of pre-trip energy flowing through my body. It was very electrical, stimulating, and euphoric. The best way of describing my mental state was getting the "doll house" effect, as if my car felt like it had the dimensions of a large house. By the time we reached the beach, shit was getting hectic to say the least. I noticed my sense of reality was slipping from my finger tips. After a delicious bowl of Chocolate Raspberry Kush out of my bong, I looked at my phone (I don't remember the exact time) and realized that exactly an hour had gone by. Immediately, I looked up at the sky only to realize it was composed of thousands of numbers and letters, sort of in a matrix fashion. Subsequently, I proceeded to laugh my fucking ass off to the point it became sort of difficult to breathe.
The car ride back to my neighborhood is still a blur in my head because I was sort of in a state of sensory overload. But it was by all means an excellent car ride, nothing to complain about there. Our fun was soon replaced by confusion by the time we reached my neighborhood.
Of my acquaintances needed to eat dinner with his grandparents (the sober one) and asked if we could drop him and my other acquaintance off. He then realized that no one was in any state of mind to be driving and I made a very bad decision to let him borrow my car with the condition that he came back IMMEDIATELY when he finished. He agreed and I decided to hang out with my friend B in his car. That hour that we waited for those kids to come back felt like an unmeasurable period of time. It didn't feel like hours, days, or weeks, it just felt like no time was going by at all. What the fuck was time anyway? It simply ceased to exist. The sky was filled with multicolored letters and fractals of all sorts, which was somewhat entertaining. I discussed fundamentals of life with my friend. He was only on one tab so it was somewhat harder to connect on a deeper level with him.
The kids finally returned, only to find B and myself going apeshit. We could barely finish a sentence because we were laughing so hard. I don't even think 6 grams of mushrooms has put me in that place before. The kids said they needed to drop of a sack of weed and needed a car to do it. My judgment was shattered to pieces at this point, so I simply said fuck it and let them drive it regardless of the idiocy of the choice I was making. Never trust 16 and 17 year-olds with your car when your not in it, especially if you are not good friends with them….
After 30 minutes, I started blowing up their phones. No answer. FUCK!!! What if they stole my car? Or crashed it? Or got pulled over? A seemingly endless stream of thoughts flowed through my head, and made me panic. I realized this awesome trip was going bad, FAST! It only got worse when I realized my turntables and mixer were in the trunk (yes, I spin electronic music for fun sometimes, but hopefully will be a a career at some point). Finally, after calling those kids a billion times, someone answered the phone. But it wasn't a guy.(both of the kids/acquaintances/whatever you want to call them were male). It sounded like some girl that one of the kids was most likely banging. She answered and said the two kids weren't available. I started bitching at her and she hung up on me. Great vibes for a major trip, right? After another relentless series of phone calls, the original kids who I got the acid with picked up the phone, but I found out they were both tripping now. FUCK. Those lying pieces of shit. I said ,"Where the FUCK are you?" They responded with, "I don't know man, I'm tripping." Fucking bitches, those kids.
I started crying for a good ten minutes (who knows how long really?) and freaked out. But, of course, my fear and misery were quickly replaced by one of the intense euphorias I have ever experienced in my entire life OUT OF FUCKING NO WHERE! Completely swept me off my feet. Sadness turned to giddiness and uncontrollable giggling. I told myself everything was going to be alright.
I continued to display terrible judgment by letting my friend drive to the strip mall about 4 minutes away from my neighborhood (especially considering the fact he was already a sub-par driver). Right when we parked, I bolted out of the car because I was completely and utterly exhilarated. I had the sense I was peaking, and I was losing track of what was going on. I couldn't think of what day of the week it was, or what my name was. Strangely, I still wouldn't call this ego death because I still had (some) sense that I existed and that I was a living human being. If anything, I'd call it moderate, MAYBE strong ego loss. The closed eye visuals were INSANE!!!!! It looked like a beautiful rug that you see on the floor of a fancy persian restaurant. It reminded me of an extremely complicated mosaic pattern.
Then, things started getting REALLY introspective. I started to think about actual personal issues I had, such as my MAJOR lifelong lack of self-esteem and tendency to act immature. I started thinking to myself, "What the fuck is my problem? No wonder I don't have very many friends. I drive them away by acting like I'm a child." These thoughts were completely valid. I had very few friends and this was the direct result of the way I carried myself about in society. I shaved MAYBE once a week and didn't bother to brush my teeth often at all. I looked slightly unkept, but never took the time to look in the mirror and notice how socially unacceptable this was. These personal insights completely separated this trip from any trip I had ever had in the past. Realizing all of these things filled me with intense feelings of wonder simply because I had no idea any drug was powerful enough to have such profound mental effects. I had no idea how strong of a drug LSD was, not even close until I had this experience. I ignored the extreme jaw clenching I was experiencing, pain and discomfort had no impact on my extreme sense of inner peace at that point.
We walked into the Ralph's grocery store for the hell of it. The intensity of this point of the trip cannot be described fully in words, but I will do my best. The trails made by the movement of people walking around in the store were prominent enough to made it difficult to see. The ground and other objects were not breathing, but instead they were swirling in almost a circular motion. I could have sworn I was sharing the same mentality as EVERY SINGLE LAST PERSON in that store. It was almost like I could read everyone's mind but I did not want to. I felt their thoughts were none of my damn business so I did my best to ignore what they were thinking about (though this just seemed like one gnarly hallucination).
I bought a pack of gum to ease the ridiculous tension of my jaw, then me and B went outside again. I remember telling him to hurry with me to the car because I could feel the passion and love of a couple literally exploding into my brain. It was…….overwhelming, but in a bizarre way.
Anyway, B told me he was hungry and we decided to go to Souplantation across the street (a soup and salad buffet in my area). I didn't really understand the concept of hunger at this point either. I had literally no appetite at all.
He snuck into the buffet without paying while I sat outside the restaurant on a bench, TRIPPING FUCKING BALLS. I saw two old folks walk in with a child that seemed to be their grandchild, and their movements were followed by trails that were covered in patterns (YES, i saw patterns in their trails). Not to mention the hugest trails I had ever seen from a psychedelic. I also noticed the wall looked like they were taken from a scene from the matrix - every number 1-9 in some green font. I somehow found the ground fucking hilarious, and for some reason it reminded me of a jazz saxophone (yeah, acid will do that to you :p). The ground was swirling and seemed to be made of some jello-like substance. I also remember imagining a black man running around in my head, who was also tripping on acid. His pupils took out the color of both his eyes, and he was was laughing his ass off and cumming (yes, ejaculating semen) all over my brain. Some weird ass fucking shit to say the least.
At some point, we decided to go back to my neighborhood when our trip died down a bit. I believe this was….6.5-7 hours in, I just don't remember the exact times things occurred. Eventually, after many more phone calls, I got a hold of those kids and B drove his car to the location of my car. I believe this was 7.5-8 hours into the trip. I found out that they had lied and were indeed using my car to drive to some drunk sluts' house to get laid. I was so relieved that I did not feel one iota of anger towards them. I just wanted to go back to my neighborhood. Things had died down enough for me to drive, but I still felt a lot more comfortable following B's car back to my house (his trip was nearly over as it was only a single tab that he had initially taken). After I got back to my neighborhood, he drove home. Finally, the problems that night threw my way were solved.
I spent the rest of that night thinking about ways to live my life differently. I learned that a lot of self-esteem is earned through treating yourself nicely (working out at the gym, eating well, shaving, grooming, carrying yourself about in a manner others respect). I also realized that in order to have friends, I needed to stop acting socially unacceptable. After this trip, I finally knew that having an image of maturity will always result in you earning WAY more respect from your peers, whether they are in high school or much older. Acting mature is the only way to become a functioning member of our society because no one looks up to someone that can't be taken seriously.
Though I did not get even a minute of sleep, I felt INCREDIBLY refreshed the morning after that trip. More refreshed than I ever had in my entire life. I felt…..reborn. I was a new person. I started the day by cleaning my filthy, messy car for an hour then cleaning my room that was piled with dirty clothes. My days of being a child were over. I felt pretty accomplished for gaining the motivation to clean, which I never dreamed I would have the motivation to do. It was like starting anew; now I knew what a truly beautiful, life-changing experience LSD could provide to a person. I have the deepest appreciation for the work Albert Hofmann has done for the world and our society as a whole.
Though I am still a self-conscious person, at least I know I take care of myself and treat myself well. I also have gained a countless number of new friends after experiencing my "rebirth"… people just realized I was no longer the obnoxious, immature, socially awkward person they had come to know. People started calling me to hang out, smoke with them, all that good stuff. Even go to parties and kickbacks. Now I started to know what it was like to have a normal circle of friends. I would not give up this experience for the world.
Peace and love. Good vibes to anyone that actually read this entire thing :)