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Level 3 .. again??

Seeing with my eyes closed.

Background: Since I was 15 years old I used a lot of drugs including LSD a few times and shrooms on many occasions. On my 30th birthday I decided it was time to quit it all including weed. I only drank alcohol since then. Now I am 33 years old and a few months back I got interested in psychedelics again. As I l am Dutch I chose to take sclerotia. They are still legal here.

That first time getting re acquainted was a very nice high level 2 trip. But it was also the highest level trip I ever had. ( In retrospect that should have been my first warning I had never really tripped, I just had some fun with smaller doses). I liked it so much I decided to do it again 2 weeks later. I went to the same shop and bought the same fresh 15 grams of white diamonds scleroitia. (fucking brand names I thought).

I will go into the second trip since I quit first. While cutting it up ( I always make tea but also ingest the pulp). I had a feeling it was a lot more than last time but I did not bother to weigh it to check. I still believe it was 20 grams though because after cutting it still looked like more than the previous 15 grams. After drinking the tea I noticed I went much further much faster. I was watching TV and I noticed my vision was stuttering so much I could not navigate channels decently. I have had that before in a few trips but that was on the highest peak I ever had and that ended pretty soon. Now I kept climbing and at one point I decided I wanted to find a pocket knife I had lost because it has a very nice textured wooden handle I wanted to look at. It took me very long to find it (I knew where it was but I was to far gone to find it).

I did manage to find it but at that point I noticed that I was still not done climbing to my peak. I decided It was not a good idea to have a sharp object around while tripping this hard, so I put it away.

Then 'it' happened. I noticed that my perception of time was altered: I was doing things but I only realised what I was doing  after I did them. That scared the shit out of me. I also noticed the thought loops many described but I never experienced. Of the words I thought I only heard the most significant echoed continuously. I started to panic and though "oh my god I am having a bad trip, let it end". I wanted out and decided to wait until the effects wore off but as I was experiencing time anomaly time seemed to stand still. Then I realised I was wrong trying this and having read a lot of trip reports prior helped me at this point. I looped "it will always end" and "nothing is wrong it is just your mind" and that helped me calm down. Still a bit anxious I decided to lay down on the couch. When I closed my eyes I had the most amazing 3d CEV for the first time in my life. It was a beautiful experience that ended with a spiritual being that told me if I would surrender myself to it I would be safe. An intense feeling of Euforia came over me and I opened my eyes and I was happy and felt at peace.

The nearby church clock chimed midnight. I noticed that it only took 15 minutes from the time I panicked to the time I awoke reborn. The next days after I did feel a bit of fear thinking back about this very impacting experience.But I also felt it made me stronger.

After that I decided I would not go that far for a while and I only had 10 grams of tampanensis with a 5 gram re dose after 1.5 hours since. That gave me a disappointing level 1 trip although I did have fun walking up a nearby hill and watching the sunset and the view of my city.

Yesterday 4 weeks after that last trip I decided I would get 15 grams of tampanensis and take them  all at once, expecting a level 2 .. I did use a food processor to chop the sclerotia to a fine pulp this time instead of a knife and I also used a lot of lemon to make the tea taste better that might have had an effect while I let the tea cool. Before drinking.

When I drank my tea I noticed that I got effects very fast. I decided to watch TV knowing I would be gowning further than I planed before the trip.Waved vision became so strong within an hour I knew I was going for a level 3 again. *gulp*. I layed down on the couch again and closed my eyes and BOOM had amazing 3d CEV . As I have learned light in the room affects the CEV as does the last thing I see before I close my eyes. I decided to put one some music. I love a lot of music including MetaL but that would not go well so I chose Riders on the storm by the Doors (I mean music made on acid must trip well I thought). I noticed the CEV were affected by the music and loved it, but after some time I started to hate the effect of the organ solo that me see and feel erratic things.

I decided to mute sound and got into bed to "ride the storm".

-I had a wild ride, I had colourful geometric CEV
-I had visions that almost felt like I was seeing with my eyes closed
-I had very hard moments where I started to slip into a horror trip (Flaming skulls, eyes everywhere watching me, evil warrior goddesses who opened their mouths and out of those mouths came even more skulls blood and  evil patterns looping into an oblivion of evil. Those moments however only lasted for a few seconds. I chose to replace them with the sweetest images I could think of.

I felt like I was sucked into another world but fought it a few times resulting into an anxious feeling I knew would go bad if let it consume me. I decided to let myself be sucked in. After I was sucked through I felt like I was underwater, floating but I could breathe. In retrospect I think I was recalling how it was in my mothers womb, I really do..

When I was released from this floating I felt like I was making a free-fall like skydiving. I actually felt the adrenaline rush one would feel  doing something like that.

After that I got more control of the trip. I could imagine things I wanted to do and I actually felt like doing them. For example as I follow cycling I felt like I was on a racing  a bike going downhill in the alps. It got so vivid that when the road flattened put a bit I actually started to really kick my legs to pedal (like a dog or cat that is dreaming and starts running while sleeping). Like the skydiving thing I actually got the rush one would get doing so, call it a body high. I actually had to open my eyes a few time because it got to intense. Only to notice my OEV were also heavy as shit.

After a lot more visions I opened my eyes and decided I could get up again. I noticed I had peaked much faster and harder but that I also went to the afterglow and down faster.

I am still recovering from  this unexpectedly stronger trip a bit but it was an experience to remember. For those who read the whole thing : thank you but It just helped me to write about it even if nobody reads this, call it therapy.

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