Craziest experience of my life so far. No exaggeration.

I've done a fair amount of drugs in my life. I've been smoking marijuana for over a year, have done more than my fair share of DXM, and have done acid, mushrooms, and ecstacy once or twice each, and have had had some wild trips. So I'm no virgin to hallucinogens or other drugs.

Anyways, I've wanted to do salvia for over a year. Today, my best friend (who wants to do it badly after I'd described it to him) came over very excitedly with some spare cash to buy some. He's a bit of a strange kid, and tends to act out a bit. He's the type to talk loudly, and often trips even off of marijuana, so I was a tad uneasy about him doing salvia. Nonetheless, we got some 20x salvia, and he had some marijuana. We had a good bong prepared with ice in the water, and were both very excited to try it. Personally, I didn't think it'd be as crazy as all of the trip reports I'd read on the internet,  so I kept my expectations down.

He told me that I could go first. I told him (and had told him plenty of times before) to remember to be quiet while I was tripping, and he had agreed every time. I began taking my first toke of salvia on top of a thin layer of marijuana (acting as a screen). I took three long, thick, tokes, and held each in for thirty seconds. I kept waiting for reality to just fall apart, but nothing seemed to happen. I kept waiting and waiting, but nothing happened whatsoever. I told my friend and he seemed very disappointed. Anyways, he took his dose and began tripping balls pretty well. He was up walking around (I didn't want to interfere, just as I'd told him not to interfere with my trip). He tried talking, but mostly talked nonsense.

After he sobered up, he told me that it was pretty awesome. Then he decided to give me another bowl, since I'd "missed out" and said that maybe I'd feel it this time. Not expecting much, I gave it another try. I loaded a massive, fat bowl that was supposed to serve as both of our turns. I took a massive hit on one side of the bowl, and set it down and started holding it in, preparing for the next hit.

Then I looked at my friend, and noticed something strange. He was babbling his head off talking (as I'd told him not to lol). Things started seeming very, very unusual, and then BAM, I got hit. By a replacement of my room. It had felt as though the entire universe except me had suddenly moved to one side, and another universe slid into its place very quickly. In my massive shock that took my breath away, I had totally forgotten all about the salvia. I had no idea that I was on drugs, and the idea that it was a dream did not occur to me. As far as I could tell, this was reality. I'm a very scientific person, so to see reality seemingly doing impossible things with no explanation left me dumbfounded. I was in shock.

The world kept on switching with different versions, but all of them were my room. My friend was still talking loudly and quickly about God knows what (probably "OH MY GOD YOUR TRIPPING MAN WHATS GOING ON"), although what I heard him say was very strange. I couldn't verbally understand him, but I could still somehow make out what I thought he was saying. He appeared to be telling me that some kind of glitch occured in reality, and that someone was in the process of fixing it and it would be ok, and that I would not remember it afterwards and I could continue living my life of believing with very scientific and skeptical beliefs.

This was probably just my brain making up things as some way to comprehend what was going on, as I'm used to the universe working in very specific patterns, and such a disruption put me in total shock. I soon forgot this world, however, as the next thing I knew, the wall in front of me began inflating. I forgot all about the universe switching in over and over again, and now the inflating wall was all I was focusing on. I was again dumbfounded and could not explain what was going on. All of the walls in my room inflated and my friend and I were being squeezed. He was still running his mouth of course, and I thought that he was trying to tell me how to get out of htis mess. He was half-laughing, half-speaking, so I thought he knew what was going on with te walls inflating.

I thought that he was trying to explain why this was happening, and the solution. He seemed to be telling me to press some kind of a button somewhere, but I kept thinking "no matter what kind of device and no matter what is in my room, THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY THIS CAN BE HAPPENING." I was panicking and probably screaming loudly. Then I looked at my friend again, and things changed once more. He was still talking, and he turned into the shape of giant hammer. Every color in the objects around him also turned into giant hammers. Next thing I knew, I every joint of my body became a hammer. My mind felt as though it itself was made up of multiple different hammers, and the next thing I knew, the entire universe was just rows of billions of billions of hammers, all rocking back and forth in the exact same motion.

My body and consciousness was in several pieces across this field, and I was truly freaking the fuck out. How could this have suddenly become reality? I considered that I died and that this was the afterlife. Or perhaps my life had been a dream, and this was existence all along. Perhaps the world of explainable physics and unmoving physical law that I had been so accustomed to was all fake, and that this was the true reality.

I went through several different environments (in one, my friend and I were ants on an apple), and every time, I forgot about the previous environment and thought that my current one was the undeniable reality of existence. The trip eventually ended, and as I was coming off of it I realized that it was just chemicals in my brain.

Of all the drugs I've done, salvia was by far the most intense. I've had some crazy trips, but I"ve never thought that my body was made entirely of objects. It was a very scary experience and my friend talking the whole and saying "HEEEYYYY MAN CALM DOWN" when I can't understand what he's saying made it kind of a bad trip, but I'll still remember it. I hope to do salvia again and plan on doing it on DXM next time? But I don't know if salvia will ever be this fun again as I'll be knowing what to expect...