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Most Meaningful Trip

this world is messed up.. great trip

Ive experienced mushrooms 31 times now. Tripped acid once like three weeks ago, 1.5 tab. Anyways.. This has been one of the most meaningful trips Ive ever had and by the end of it I found clarity unlike any other trip. I will do my best to explain. Ive read lots of other trip reports on here and this one will be a little bit different but Im also quite curious if others have shared a similar experience.

Preface:
This is a mushroom trip report but let me begin with this. Two nights ago my friend W and I decided to trip skittles. We both 9 each and we were both surprised that we tripped pretty hard. I say we were surprised because a while back we both ate 16 and just eating 9 brought about a very similar trip as far as strength is concerned. Either way, were never gunna do them again just cause they%u2019re not that fun and pretty fuckin dangerous. So yesterday we both were kinda in a funk, a dis-reality if you will, because of the skittles. I had work all day but during the day one of my other friends told me he was planning on trip which kind of inspired me to want to trip mushrooms that night. Last night. I felt like I wanted a trip to bring me out of the funk and bring some sort of revelation.

General Info:
Me: You can call me F
Age: 19
Weight: 165lbs
Shrooms: 30 times (before this trip), all 1/8th trips except for one quarter trip.
Acid: 1.5 tabs (try acid its amazing)

W: Ill call him W
Age: 22
Weight: 125lbs
Shrooms: 3 times (before this trip)
Acid: 4 times. Two 1tab trips, one 1.5tab trip, and one 2tab trip.

Last Nights Batch:
W and I got an 8th of shrooms through a mutual friend. We decided that we were going to split the 8th because I had eaten only four stems of the same kind a few days earlier and go a pretty decent trip out of them. They were pale white with bluish-green streaks on them. We were also warned that a half 8th was a good amount. We were both pretty excited to see what was in store for us.

Original Plans:
We were gunna trip with two of our friends R and S but they didnt have enough money so it was just W and I.

Setting:
Since we were going to be tripping balls we both decided that the best place to be, and actually where we all kinda hang out anyways, was at my apartment. It is a pretty decently sized apartment so we wouldnt feel cramped. Seats were set up in front of TV which was hooked up to my computer for videos and music. There is a Bermuda flag on the wall as well as a poster of John Lennon and some Led Zepplin posters. Beer pong set up in the corner. It has a very nice feel to it and I find it impossible for a trip to go wrong when Im chilling in my crib.
Our original intent for our trip was to just have a great ass time, see some cool shit, have happiness explode throughout our bodies, and have an awesome ass trip to music and entertainment.

How it started off:
Well its pretty simple really. It was W, J, and I all hanging out at my apartment when my buddy S came over with the 8th. W and I both ate our half 8ths and we all sat down and started talking, listening to music, smoking some weed. We ate them around 8:30pm. After only about 15 minutes I started to feel some serious body energy as well as some sparkling where there normally wasnt. I knew that we had a pretty powerful trip coming our way.

Our other friend R came over about 30mins after we ate them. W and I were both definitely starting to feel the effects of the shrooms for sure but we hadnt crossed over into trippy-land when you know for sure youre in your trip. I dont really understand why R came over because he didnt even have any weed and wasn%u2019t tripping and he never really talked much. I heard he had a hard time with his trip so Im guessing he wanted to see how we were gunna take it. It%u2019s not like he had a bad trip, I just heard he went and laid face first in the snow for like 30 minutes. Haha.. anyways, he didnt really bother me he just sat in the corner for a while.

After about 45-50 minutes we were definitely into trippy land. Visuals included a sense that the world was a bit on a tilt depending on your body position. Arms and legs felt verrryyy comfortable and heavy. Obvious audio hallucinactions as well the music sounded beautiful. The first hour past the point we entered trippy-land was actually kinda rough. Our friend S just would not shut up about what we should watch next on Youtube and kept recommending music videos that had angry black rappers shouting at our faces with sounds of car crashes in the background. It wasn9t causing us to freak out or anything but it was kind of confusing and uncomfortable. Or would say shit like, lets watch a screamo music video with cats oh no way you guys are tripping youd freak out. S has never tripped before and I really dont think I will ever trip with him only because he seems pretty clueless. During this point I knew I was tripping balls and Im sure W was because he really wasnt saying much just chilling on his seat watching whatever we were doing. After a while I kinda made a comment that made S realize that he was being a bitch about making too many selections and talking waayyyyy to much. W and I both wanted him to shut up.. I could tell. Finally, after some time, S told us that he was going to dip and our friend R decided to leave then as well. A flooding sense of relief came over me. Finally, we had complete control over our trip. Haha

So now, it just me, W, and our good friend J. J has never tripped either but hes cool as fuck and funny to be around. Great guy to trip with because hes kinda like the father of the group makes you feel safe and shit. I was talking to them about my acid trip. I told them that I read some time ago that if the police catch you or youre in a hospital and they find out youre on acid or shrooms then you are considered clinically insane while you are tripping. I told them that when I was tripping I was walking up to a park bench where one of my friends was sitting and how I remembered thinking, Im clinically insane right now.... but thats only because Ive read about it. Haha and then I started cracking up. I mean its kinda true, I never wouldve had thought that I was insane if I hadnt read about it. I dont think youre insane when youre tripping. Youre who you are, just trippin. Well, I guess if you take like 4tabs of acid you might be crazy haha.

Visual hallucinations at this point:
When I was taking a piss in the bathroom when I looked down at the floor I could blend the floor with what I was seeing two feet from my face. It was pretty intense but then I would laugh to myself and say but I can get out of this and then I would walk away and sight would mend back to normal. The flag in my room was waving EPICLY. All the walls seem to shimmer and move. Carpet can become moving sea. Faces on TV are hard to focus on kind of... seem like theyre made of out water. Moving head slowly causes tilting sensation as well as time distortion. Very cool feelings floating through body, very comfortable. Things can seem to stretch out to infinity.. makes you feel vulnerable and small but other times powerful. The shrooms were very good.

Moving onward:
W, J, and I continued talking and listening to music and smoking more weed. J recommend a movie we watch and he told us he was prolly gunna pass out which was cool with us. For the next hour and a half W and I tripped pretty hard, it was during the movie that I would say the most intense visual hallucinations occurred. At one point my entire sight seemed to split up into a spiral of color and then pulsate and then returned to normal. They were never freighting but I will admit it a very different world and you better hold on tight if youre gunna be trippin hard. There were other smaller and fascinating visuals as well such as things moving up and down. The flag melted at one point but not hardcore.. it just made red seep across the wall. At points W and I would look at each other and just start laughing. At this point we were both tripping really hard so we werent talking that much but rather just experience our emotions by ourselves. Throughout the movie we smoked cigarettes but no weed. Cigarettes taste very nice on shrooms and you cant feel the smoke in your lungs so it%u2019s easy to smoke, one of the most pleasant things to do while tripping as it also relaxes you a lot because its such a routine activity (if youre a smoker.)

The Movie:
The movie was pretty interesting. It had some very intense moments and some sad moments. It made me think about being hardworking; it made me almost cry because I missed my ex-girlfriend pretty bad. One of the girls in the movie was absolutely crazy so she was entertaining to watch and there was this other guy that had an awesome way with words that was very entertaining especially considering we were tripping. At the end of the movie I looked at W and said, The amount of emotions that have passed through this room in the past hour and a half is incredible. He agreed by saying, I feel like I just experienced my entire life man.

The movie at times was too difficult to concentrate on because of how hard we were tripping in which case you could look at some point on the wall or play with my cat or smoke a cigarette and watch the smoke.

At the end of the movie we were definitely still tripping balls, we were only what 4 hours into the trip maybe even less. So everything still was very trippy and somewhat confusing like we still had something to figure out if you know what I mean. This is when the trip changed lanes for a bit but defintetly from here on out the trip was very meaningful, powerful, sad, happy, encouraging, verryyy real, and... well. Let me do my best to explain.

W and I have a talk:
Once the movie finished J was definitely passed out and it was just W and I chilling. I was looking around for another movie to put in or maybe put on some music when I heard W say, I may be only sayin this because Im trippin but... this grabbed my attention like no other because I feel like I knew immediately what we were about to talk about. Only because I know what its like to be tripping and Ive had my own thoughts and shit and I felt like from the tone of his voice I knew he wanted to talk. He began to ask me if I ever felt like I was at the end of my rope. Like.. all options have been exhausted and that it would be so much easier to just give it all up to make the pain go away. This made sound like a sad conversation but I must admit Ive felt the exact same way and have even had thoughts like this especially when I am tripping. I told him that he shouldnt be hard on himself. W is going through a pretty tough time right now because he doesn%u2019t have a job and just like me, he has made plenty of mistakes throughout his life. I felt bad that he was feeling down on himself so I was telling him that he really was a great guy and that there are way worse things in life. We then decided to go to the smoking section of my apartment and we both sat down. From then on out we basically didnt stop smoking cigarettes and talking. We talked about the hardships of life. The fact that you dont want your friends to leave you and that you never want to be alone. I told him that I thought that is what hell is... when you die and if you are all alone that would be absolute torment. We talked about the mistakes that we have made and how fucked up the human race is for fucking over such a perfect world. We talked about God and salvation. We talked about how we both have flirted with the dark forces of evil. We talked about the omnipresence of God and the fact that even if you dont believe in him he is inescapable because even if you do deny him he is still in the world around you. Even in the sense that if youre an atheist you will still be confronted with the question of God. I have always noticed then when I am on shrooms I do notice that the world becomes very real and it becomes very easy to notice the forces of evil, or good for that matter, and has such importance on the trip. W and I talked about this for some time. The shrooms were kind of like the fruit of good and evil in the sense that it opens your eyes to a lot of the world that you dont notice when you are sober. I used to deny God and even hate the thought of worshipping him and to be perfectly honest Ive thought to myself, fuck this shit Im going to be evil if it gets me money and success or whatever.I have never gone over the edge where I actually am evil but I will not deny Ive flirted with the idea of evil.. or even contacting dark spirits. The truth is I do not want to be evil, and neither does W, but we were asking ourselves how humans have gotten themselves so fucked up. We both were admitting some of our darker thoughts but we also went on to say that that wasnt we really wanted and how we did notice the power of good and that is what we wanted to be a part of. We asked ourselves questions like how God could ever forgive us after some of things weve done or thought, but those questions were followed but us agreeing that it was obvious that the power of Gods love was powerful enough for our sins.. or dark thoughts. I must admit it was so relieving to finally be able to sit down and talk with someone and try and figure out good versus evil, God versus Satan. I strongly believe there is warfare between the aforementioned over the souls of people. Neither of us were trying to be evil or good at that point, we were talking about what we have done in our lives or what we have thought or what we have tried to do and how it has affected us and how God has saved us from certain things. It was literally impossible for us to deny God, he was there, not physically, but the fact that he exists and does love us more than our evil was plain as day. Its like that was reality. We continued talking about our relationships with our friends, our relationships with our parents, and what different things meant to us. We talked about the pursuit of happiness and what that means. We talked about the people that we admire and why we admire them. We talked more about the dark forces in this world and how that it was so clear that evil was taking over this world in the shit you see everyday and what this world is becoming. I told him that I thought hell would be like a shroom trip where you are all alone in darkness without the love of God. If you were sitting with us then, or think about that, you will know exactly what I mean. I went on to say that a heaven would be like a shroom trip where you are with all of your friends and the Creator of the universe comes up to you and says, nah, W, you didnt do that bad. I forgive you and I love you and then hed give you a big hug. We paused at that moment and W said, yeah that would be a great feeling. A great great feeling. It felt so peaceful to be able to talk so plainly about good and evil and sin and forgiveness and God and Satan. We talked for about two hours Id say.

Visual hallucinations at this point:
Everything looked beautiful. Swelling of walls still. My cat glimmered as he moved. At one point when I was looking at W when he was sitting up against the wall his face completely blended in with the wall and it was just a pair of eyes. This would happened and then I would look away and then back and I would see him again. I believe it is because the room was quite dark so there wasnt too much of a noticeable color difference between him and the wall. Still feel amazing and comfortable. Much more at ease in the mind because we felt so comfortable talking about anything. We literally could talk about our darkest thoughts and fears and then just address them with how we thought. It was so liberating and amazing.

After the dark talk:
W and I decided to go back into the main room where the lights were fully on and the music was and we both sat down. We woke J up and we smoked a bowl and started listening to music again. As we both sat there with cigarettes in our hands I couldnt help but feel so relieved and happy. Not only because I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulder but I felt like the love of God had returned to the room in some way. Earlier when we were both talking about how weve flirted with destruction and the dark forces we both agreed that fuck that I want to be good. Honestly, when this world is destroyed and you better believe me it will. It will be destroyed like a tiny sand castle hit by a tidal wave. W and I want to be on the ship that leads with the Creator and the only one who can love you past your sins. Do not get me wrong, I sin every single mother fucking day. I sin all the time and I know this pisses God off and I know Im a huge fuck up in his sight. Also, my brother is gay and I know the Bible names gays as abominations which has been very difficult for me. But what I do know is that salvation is a gift. It is not earned in any way shape or form, it is a gift given to you from God. ANYWAYS. Haha.. we were sitting and we were both feeling pretty good. W was telling me that he felt a so much better. We smoked a bowl and we both got very stoned. Both of us were watching various things having fun with the trippy-world. On occasion we would have short conversations about what whatever was on our mind. One thing that was brought up again was how screwed up this world is becoming. Which, yes, I agree, its fucking depressing but damnit its true. This world is covered in evil and its fucking obvious. However, it didnt seem that bad knowing that there was a force that could easily save us. After two more bowls W and I got really hungry.

Food:
This was a very entertaining part of the trip. We got up started playing some Pink Floyd as we cooked us both two bowls of soup with all sorts of vegetables and things. We were having a blast making the food and eating while preparing it. Now we were talking about much lighter things and just having a good time. At one point W felt sick to his stomach and had to sit down but this passed within 5 mins. We finished cooking and sat down and eat hot delicious soup it felt so fulfilling it was unreal. After our first bowl of soup we decided to smoke a fresh bowl of weed and soon after that we made some more soup haha. Once again we had an entertaining ass time making ourselves some food and were soon sitting back down with hot soup. At the end of this bowl I put on Sigur Ros and we both shared a cigarette. DAMN that cigarette tasted good. With full stomachs and clear minds it felt like we had over come something amazing.

Telling W about my bad trip:
At this point I felt like I knew W on a whole new level and I felt comfortable sharing some dark shit of my own. I went on to tell W about one of the bad trips Ive had. Ive had three in total but this was by farrrr the worse. This was the one time I ate two 8th at once. I told him that about 45 mins after I ate the shrooms I felt like a tidal wave hit my brain and I had to go down to my room and lay in my bed. The first three hours of that trip werent necessarly bad I just felt like a tiny little light at the bottom of the fucking ocean but after some time I thought that I was for real approaching death. Ive actually heard that before, that when you9re on shrooms its like approaching death. Anyways, I was tripping really hard if you know what I mean and I thought to myself that I was in the land between life and death. I asked myself if I was ready to leave this world and where I would be going; heaven or hell. I wondered to myself who I would meet in this in-between world. There stood before me Satan. He is a standard man. He was standing about four feet in front of me with his back turned towards me. Short hair cut, I cant see his face. It was Satan. He slowly started to turn his face towards me and of course he had a damn smile on his face. It was at this point that W said, yeah he was smiling because he thought he had you. I said, yeah, and thats when I said fuck this shit and stood up from my bed and went outside. I feel as though I came very close to death and at that point in my life if I had died I would have been taken by Satan. And he was happy as fuck that he got my soul. We talked more about good and evil and how we would much rather be on the ship with Jesus when this world is destroyed. Mind you, both W and I had Christian upbringings but we also have gone through multiple year long periods of saying fuck you to God and all things good. Even to this day we still sin like mother fuckers and will be disappointing God like no other. It is sad to think about this but remember, Gods love can conquer that shit.

Then on:
We smoked one more bowl after that and continued listening to music and talking about other things. The amount of different things we managed to talk about that night was incredible. It felt so nice to be able to talk so plainly about so many things. It felt like the more we talked with each other the more we understood the trip and the more clarity we felt, like we were figuring some serious shit out. W told me that when he prayed, (on a side note we both talked about how we barely ever ever pray), he prayed above else for wisdom so that he could understand the world around him. True fucking that. That is what I want. To be able to understand this crazy fucked up world we live in. I have never felt more close to finding the truth then when I am on shrooms and that is why I have done them so many times. I feel like the answer is out there and for some reason shrooms open my eyes in a way that helps me find it a bit easier.

Last smoke:
W and I both decided that this has been one of the most meaningful trips and that it was absolutely incredible. We deuced our last cigarette, I put on some chillax music and we both peacefully drifted off to sleep. When I went to my bed I used one of my sweatshirts as a pillow and inside of it I found a pack of cigarettes that only had three cigs missing, a cherry on top of a fantastic trip. A gift from God?

Afterwords:
I%u2019m only saying that I have noticed that shrooms does open your eyes to the darker side of this world. Or actually, I think shrooms just open your eyes more, like the tree of good and evil and you just are much more aware of good and evil. Unfortunately this world is full of evil and that is why it must appear sometimes that shrooms can have a darker notion to them. I also want to point out that I am not an amazing Christian person; I sin all the fucking time. I do not think I am any better than any other person in this world. I do not believe in judging others and I really cant stand when people get upset at others for sinning because to be honest everyone sins every day. I am saved though through the grace of God.

Im not sure if anyone else has noticed this about shrooms... that you notice good and evil much more in the world around you. I dont know if you believe in God or not. All Im saying is every time Ive tripped italways been a bit confusing trying to figure this world out and Ive never had a more clarifying, satisfying trip. It was amazing.

Shrooms can really open your eyes mannn.

All of this happened last night.

I would love some feed back :]

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