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An experience with Psilocybe cyanofibrillosa

3g dried, alone in the snow

     Hello everyone. This is my first time writing down an experience with this species, and I'll try to be as descriptive as possible. I had this idea of tripping alone in the snow for a while, but never had the audacity to try it, untill recently. 

     It began with a 4 mile hike to an old fire lookout in the Washington Cascades. Took a while to get all my things unpacked and a fire started, but the time was drawing near. Go time!! I took the 3g of dried Psilocybe cyanofibrillosa and threw them into my mouth, chewing and swallowing the juices for about 5 mins and washed em down with some OJ. After only a few minutes, I began to feel it. That slight tingle in my legs, as if they are half asleep. Moving towards my inner core, it explodes in waves and pulses of heat, and a very low frequency tone. I drink some water, which feels like winter running down my windpipe, refreshing and clensing.  Only 30 mins in and I feel it comming on strong. I put on some warm layers and venture outside for a few minutes (or so I thought). As soon as I open the door to go outside, the wind hits my face. the snow is a beautiful white, flawless and prestine. Trees that were once frozen now look like icy towers from a far away land of knights and chivalry.  Looking around, the world begins to change, and sensing I will soon be gone from this world, I make the decision to go back inside. I have totally lost the ability to tell time at this point.

     The door seems very cold and forgotten as my hand grasps the handle, forcing it open. I felt very sad at this moment, like the door had been forgotten by everyone that had ever touched it. I close it behind me, shutting the wind and snow out. A stomp of the feet to releas any unwanted snow from my boots. With the first stomp, roots of color and light, much like lightning, spread out from my right foot and find their way into the cracks of the old, wooden floor to disolve into the structure. Left foot stomp, and the floor begins to move as if my foot was a drop of water in a wooden lake. The waves twist and contort the floor boards, much like the way Ice in a lake moves with the waves. I get my boots off after a long struggle with the laces and move to the bed I set up earlier. I lay down and await what is to come.

     A good ammount of time is spent just watching shapes change, and colors become vivid. I curl up in my sleeping bag, pulling it tight against my chin. Waves of emotions and thoughts run through my mind. This state of mind remains with me for a good period of the trip (or so I believe). It was so relaxing and rewarding to be allowed to enter this reality. I sat up on the bed and thanked myself for being strong, fearless, and understanding of what's happening. I felt as if I had everything under control, and I could manipulate anything I wanted. I had a huge boost of positive emotions running though my mind, but it was not ment to last. I can feel things getting more intense. I get a bit worried and decide to close my eyes for a short time.

     With my eyes closed I see magnificent shapes that seem to morph into weird masks. Each mask was different, and was always influenced by the previous. I only vividly remember the transformation of three masks. The first was an animal, much like a deer, but with an elongated face that seemed to keep stretching. It was breathing out  yellow/orange streamers, much like tissue streamers, or those clowns that make it look like they swallowed a really long rag. The antlers on top of the skull turn into long, drooping ears that are twisted like rope. The mouth opens and slowly begins to swallow it's self backwards (if that makes sense) When it takes shape again, I see an old man's face. I see the lifetime of this man in his face, each area a different memmory, a glimpse into it's soul. I can see sweat dripping off his brow, looking nervous and scared, almost like it was awaiting judgement for untold evil. It begins to melt, dripping down onto a layer of darkness and forming a pool that is a very intense blue color. The liquid begins to drip upwards now. Faster and faster, with vigor, the liquid begins to take shape. Long hair of the same blue, curly and elegant. A womans face, without a single flaw, perfect in every way. Emotions of fear, jealousy, rage, and despair flow into my soul. Her eyes are closed, but seem like they are held shut by something. Then I realize, her eyelashes are actually thread. Someone had sewn her eyes shut. Hands appear and begin clawing at the eyes and ripping the threads out. They suddenly burst open and a bright, white light consumes my thoughts. I open my eyes and see the world I have just entered.

     The walls are all sucked into the middle of each other, and themselves, reminding me of those old "bitter beer face" comercials. This makes me burst into laughter, but not just any laughter. I can see the sound waves traveling through the air, bouncing off every surface in the room and resonating a picture back to me. This was a bit weird, but made for a spectacular show of tracers and light. All of the light returning to me started collecting it's self in the form of a sphere that was levitating over my hands. It was like I could gather my own emotions in physical form. I became frightened and dropped the ball on accident, causing it to shatter into millions of pieces, each in it's own way, a part of myself. I suddenly became very sad, like I had failed at capturing my emotions to save for others to experience. I felt tears run down my face, and I began to sob. I put my hands to my face and closed my eyes. Visions of dark demons began to break their way into my subconsious. Slashing claws into flesh, teeth grinding bone still attached to legs, arms, faces. I soon realized I must break through the darkness to survive. With all of my might, I faught through the sea of unholy sights that I do not dare describe,  running towards a dark canyon. Everything turns black.

     I open my eyes and find myself sitting on the mattress in the lookout. Things are still very colorful and visual, which is a nice change from the evil land I had just escaped. I lay back and watch the explosions of shapes, colors, and objects. From this point on, things begin to calm down. I finally realized how long I was gone. Over 4 hrs has passed, but it felt like a lifetime. I throw a piece of chocolate in my mouth and lay back down. After some time I finally fall asleep, with nothing but my thoughts and visions keeping me company in a world of dreams and endless possibilities.

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