Around three or so months ago, I had the most intense mushroom experience I've had to date. One of my friends from work informed me that he had the best mushrooms that he had ever tried, so I bought an ounce off of him. It had been probably close to six months since the last time I had tripped, so I was quite eager to make up for lost time; however my work/school schedules prevented it for another month and a half. Finally, my three friends that I always trip with coordinated a day off and we got down.
We met at my house around 7:00 PM, and all ingested our share; for my part, I took two pills of killer ecstasy that I had purchased from my dealer and a quarter of the mushrooms. The evening was absolutely beautiful, so we stood outside my house watching the sunset over the mountains, smoking cigarettes. It took only about fifteen minutes to begin feeling some heavy effects.
The first part of the trip was absolutely euphoric. Everything was beautiful. I began playing Geometry Wars II, while listening to Joachim Garraud's Toolroom Knights, which never ceases to amaze me. All of the shapes of the game began to melt into and out of each other and the colors absolutely blew my mind. We eventually made our way up to my room where I have my music library and I began playing some of the new tracks that I had wanted to show my friends (especially my friend Chris, who is my fellow electronic music enthusiast). By this point I had wanted to listen to Wolfgang Gartner's "Fire Power" while tripping for a while and it did not disappoint. The itunes visualizer is absolutely amazing. For those unfamiliar with it, small white balls of light release large dark masses, which are either flat, invisible or reflective, and the white balls send colorful webs of light around the masses until they are diminished or assimilated, etc. If that doesn't make sense, then I recommend checking it out. The "M" key changes the theme, or the visuals. It always blows me away.
Chris then showed me Justice's "A Cross the Universe," which I was skeptical of listening to, because I've never been a nu-disco kind of guy; but it was truly amazing. The end of "Stress" where they go into "We Are Your Friends," ended my world. I was lying on the carpet of my living room with my eyes closed, passing from being conscious to going inward; all the while the slow chanting of the track "We... You... come on." The crowd can be heard in the background filling in the rest of the line, and the effect it had on me was nothing short of profound. I felt it in every part of my being.
At one point, I was lying in between two of the massive pillows from my couch and I slowly became a part of them. I felt the pressure on my skin and it felt as though I weighed a thousand pounds. My skin felt like a very malleable silly putty and anything that put pressure on any part of my body would become a part of me. By this point it was obvious that I was tripping harder than anyone else. I had no real grasp of reality. That's when the trip became real intense.
This part of the trip I just remembered a couple weeks ago (I'll explain why later). There's no real way to describe it, but I'm sure that many on this site have experienced something similar. My mind got caught in a sort of loop. Visuals and sounds kept replaying in my head - many loud buzzes, and images that would implode and fall in on themselves. I had absolutely no link to what was going on and I'm quite interested to know what I was doing while this was going on. I wish I could explain the visuals but there's no real way to. I suppose they remind me of something from a cubist painting or from surrealist art. They always ended in a sort of obnoxiously loud buzzing noise and then things would go static and something else would take its place. I can't begin to assess how long this went on, but the next thing I remember was thinking that I was dead. It was incredibly relaxing.
I was watching a light show, and all the while it felt as though I was floating above the couch, slowly making my way from existence. The only regret I have over this period was that my association of thought was going haywire. Every thought was frantically sparking another thought; and though I was able to ignore it for some time, after a while, it began to get to me. I tried to speak to my friends to calm my mind down, but they didn't understand what I was going through, because I couldn't communicate properly. I was able to calm myself after about ten minutes, after which time I was incredibly lucid and back to my normal, excited self. Once back to reality, we continued to listen to new music and just danced for the rest of the night.
I was still in a state of confusion, however, because (as I sort of mentioned before) I completely forgot the mind-loop thing that had happened - but I sort of remembered parts of it; or rather, I was aware that parts of what I remembered could not have happened. I did not remember any point in time where I was by myself and my friends just told me things like "yeah, you were absolutely gone." Not being able to remember was quite frustrating; but how I remembered was truly incredible.
Probably about a month or so later, I came into possession of some really strong acid, which I had never taken before. The trip was incredible; absolutely nothing made sense. The physical high was very interesting (some residual effects still linger); and I could not even begin to comprehend my mouth.
But after I took a couple hits of some chronic, as we were making our way outside for a cigarette (this is several hours into the trip), my mind began to go into the same loop. It would occur when I spaced out for too long, staring at something and trying to think. Recognition pervaded me instantly and I became fearful; I hadn't even remembered this thing until this point and now I was threatened by going into it again - this time, able to think about it, be tormented by it. I went into this several times during the trip, but was able to stay very well grounded. Dancing is what kept me most grounded; and the music that we had acquired was absolutely stunning.
The mind loop is my main infatuation with this trip. I've never experienced anything like this before, and at this point in my life, I think it was very crucial. I remember thinking that it was a form of mental reductionism. It seemed as though my mind was degrading to something base - like the first, confused conscious thoughts. Generally after profound experiences, I like to ask myself what truth I've seen; however here the question seems either irrelevant or unapproachable. Did I glimpse upon something true - something ingrained within the psychology of man, myself? More than likely not; but it's one of those occurrences that, even after years of experience with hallucinogens, makes you step back in awe and realize how little you understand about anything.