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The Spirit Network and The Spiral Gateways
Dosage: 5 grams of dried psilocybin cubensis, eaten on an empty stomach
This is trip report is of an experience that was in many ways a continuation of my previous trip “The Orgy and The Message”, which took place just over a month prior to this trip. This trip has taken me a week to process. I can say with faith that this experience conveyed some important information to anyone receptive and interested in asking questions about our connected human experience here on Earth. I want to try and minimize hyperbole in this report, as some elements that came with the trip were so poignant and powerful that my world view has since been dramatically transformed and I have now moved into a new course of life and mindset.
Thank you to Terrence McKenna, my friend and roommate B, all of our soul groups, and the universe, for the experience, lessons and messages received.
This was my thirteenth mushroom experience. I came into this mushroom trip with some knowledge and understanding from my previous trip. To summarize, in my trip from September 2009, after half an hour after eating 6 grams of psilocybin mushrooms, I was welcomed into a cosmic orgy of energy conveyance and confronted with numerous male and female presences that led me through four hours of out-of-mind reality where I was a single observer in a vast spatial network of spiritual movement of an incalculable number of entities. It was explained to me that coincidences and synchronicities that pop up in our lives are messages and energy that convey evolutionary development, for our selves and for our species, and that we should be paying attention to these events and asking questions with respect to their implications. I exited the trip with a faith that we are always within the presence of beings watching over us. We just don’t see them, nor do we often acknowledge them, because we have forgotten that they are real and distract ourselves away from this truth. But there it is.
Like my previous adventure, I planned a few things in advance before I started eating the mushrooms. There had been questions roaming around my mind that I wanted to ask these entities this time around. My questions included the following:
1) What was my birth vision? – In the book The Tenth Insight by James Redfield, sequel to the famed story The Celestine Prophecy, there is a significant portion of the book that talks about our birth visions – the reasons we chose to incarnate into physical form. While this was a concept that I did not fully understand or accept, it intuitively made sense to me that there was, and is, some reason that I came here. For a good portion of my life, I have often felt lost and moved in certain directions only to come to a lesson, then a dead end, and was then pulled into a new path with new questions. This happened at the end of high school, two jobs in between, seven years of post-secondary, and a full-time job that I quit after two and a half a years. So, at the ripe age of 27, I have wanted to remember why I came here. I’m very much tired of feeling lost.
2) How does channeling work and how can I do this? – Thanks to a friend, I was referred to a website of a channel and medium named April Crawford (www.aprilcrawford.com), because my previous mushroom trip included aspects of channeling, including being in the presence of non-physical entities. I have watched three videos on youtube.com that include April channeling the spirit named Veronica, and I grew curious about this, especially the part where April talks about her channeling experiences as being very uplifting, filled with beautiful non-judgmental loving energy.
3) How does one increase their energy from inside? – Again, for me this concept stemmed from reading The Celestine Prophecy, where Redfield talks about it in one of the insights. The insight referred to a forgotten method of raising our energy, our vibration, through appreciation and love. I have often been confronted with depression and a lack of energy, which I have so far attributed mostly to my genes and my habits. In any case, I wanted to know how this worked, so I could change the course of how I handle this energy inside of me for the better and brighter.
4) Why 42? – This one may sound out of place. Let me explain. Over the course of the last year or so, I have seen the number 42. Everywhere. I can’t verify this through statistics or “proof” because I haven’t been keeping a written record. All I know is that I have seen this number in an abnormally large number of appearances. One week, in January, I woke up three times in three consecutive mornings at , , and . One day, I went to a fruit store and bought a banana, which came to 42 cents, went next door to a cereal shop and saw 42 in big red letters as the next number to be called in the line-up, which remained stuck, on 42, for half a year. My friend and I became frustrated when we had to restart a level in Resident Evil 5 three times. We finally beat it, in exactly 42:00 (minutes). Numerous times I have looked at the clock in a day and seen the hour on minute 42. In my previous trip, while I was writing, the lamp in my room suddenly stopped working at . The other day, my computer froze up and stopped working at Douglas Adams, in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, talked about the number 42 as the answer to the universe, and there are many other references to this number in the bible and so on. Somehow, this number has made it into my presence and I became aware of this, and I wanted to know why. It may be the case that the number of appearances of 42 in my daily activities hasn’t changed at all, but I have definitely noticed its presence. Furthermore, I am not the only one to notice this, and two friends of mine in particular have reported the presence of this number in their daily activities.
With these questions in mind, I sat in my room at at night and prepared the following materials: candles, lighter, joint (marijuana), pen and paper, and drinking water. First, I meditated for ten minutes in front of a lit candle in an otherwise dark room. This meditation included lying down, deep breathing and clearing my mind. Then, I had a smoke off my joint and meditated for another twenty minutes, breathing deep, and relaxing. At this point, I ate 5 grams of dried psilocybin cubensis mushrooms. I just chewed them up with water to chase, blew out the candle, then lay down, closed my eyes, and held the quiet inside of me.
For the first half hour, everything was dark and quiet. And then the images began to appear. They didn’t appear as well-defined visuals, but rather mental images that suddenly appeared in my thought and became increasingly vivid as I focused on them. I felt as though I was being pulled to focus on them. I find this to be typical of mushroom trips. These images began as blurry presences and felt as though they were coming closer and closer. I opened myself to receive whatever was coming.
The intensity of the energy that began to bombard my mind and body revealed to me that I, or at least my awareness, my being, was no longer solely in my body, that I was beginning to experience a dual awareness. This has never happened to me before, on previous trips or otherwise. While I felt welcomed into the presence of numerous entities, I held focus on my questions at the beginning of the trip.
I was briefly greeted by both male and female presences that soon seemed to wander off as if they had something else to do. I was still lying down with my eyes closed while visualizing a “space-scape”. It looked and felt as though I was in outer space, but it was filled with a multitude of active realities. I soon began to realize that my movements through this space and my focus were no longer my own. I was linked with something or someone, and they were taking me for a ride. The dual awareness had erupted into two components: me in my body, here on Earth, and this entity, a guide, that was in the outer space star-filled network. It was just amazing, like having two minds, both working at the same time in the same place, but having completely different properties and being aware of different levels of presence, the physical and the non-physical.
However, this ride and the dual awareness became frightening, and there were moments where I resisted and wanted it to stop, but I was assured that this was in line with what I had asked for when I began, so my choice throughout the whole of the trip was to allow it all to occur. The kid gloves had come off. While I could have stopped it at any time if I made a focused effort, once things got busy, this choice to stop took on great distance while I was enveloped in the experience.
Firstly, I felt an immense surge of energy through my being. It was so massive that I was out of control, a river of intensity moving through everything inside me, almost pulling me into pieces but not quite, and all in the knowledge that I had allowed it to happen. I was again assured by the individual guiding me that this was what I was looking for. It was in this assurance and the commanding presence of this individual in my dual awareness that kept me from shrinking away in fear into what could have been an awful trip. I am very fortunate to have come into this one with experience, and glad to be able to remember a good portion of it to relay it here. My in-body self portion of the dual awareness let me do that.
Through these realities, and in no particular order, I saw a face made of blood drowning in a pool of its own decay, crying for help. If I had to identify it (which may not be a correct assessment of what was actually happening), I saw someone die, face the fear of coming to that death, and spiral out from the physical dimension back into the network and disappear. This happened multiple times. I saw an entity grasping at anything it could for energy, a vampire of sorts; not a vampire preying on others in malice, but a starving entity craving energy. Through my body, the individual in control, alongside myself, absorbed energy from “somewhere” and cast it out into this entity. This also happened many times throughout the experience. While I had my eyes closed, there was one point where I could actually see light emanating in a dark spot in my room. This light was then thrust like a beam into one of the starving beings, and then my focus turned to something else.
Early on in the trip, not even an hour in, I sat up and was compelled to begin going back and forth sending energy and messages, and writing down text. I was being put to work, and it felt like I had little time to do everything that was planned for the whole experience. I became frantic. I lit two candles, grabbed the paper and pen, and started writing. The writing went on through the night right until the end of the fourth hour. I felt like I was in a high-energy rush, trying to convey so much information into a form so slow (writing), and being unable to keep pace with the thoughts that were coming. Some of the words written were not my own, and I can confirm this for myself because some of it contains information of which I had no prior awareness. The words themselves came out so messy that some were illegible.
After finishing the first couple pages of writing, my attention was instantly diverted back to entities that needed energy. At this point, I was no longer in control of my body, and I watched as my (the) arms moved around in some sort of energy dance, moving energy one way and then another, while sitting on my bed. I could feel surges of heat going through my head, into my shoulders, and jolting right into my hands and outward, and I could detect that this energy was being absorbed by “others” that needed it. My body had become a vessel of expression for this entity that threw energy out like fireballs which were received hungrily. This energy transfer came in several forms, including very intense sex, so intense that it was draining. Wonderful, but draining. Images of extraordinary feminine beauty came and went, enticing me to follow their direction, and when I did, an energy exchange would take place. My question about this whole energy transference was answered before I even asked.
The answer, it came to me, centered on the concept of a black hole. Black holes are starving realities based on a thought process from the network non-physical dimension. They are starving for energy that is needed to create what they want. The physical parallel of this would be a plant, which begins as nothing but a tiny seed and is fed energy (sunlight and water in the physical, and love in the non-physical) in order to blossom to its full extent. Black holes absorb energy to blossom into their full extent, realities created by conscious entities attempting to bridge into the physical dimension from the spirit network. I watched as I, and my guide, fed energy into an entity that was attempting to create this, and I was shocked at the feeling of being incredibly drained. In some ways, energy was coming into me, but there were many blockages from my body and my mind, and I was notified of this.
This energy transfer stopped, and I did some more writing, before I had to go to the bathroom. I was drinking a lot of water and my body felt very warm. I was exhausted, but compelled to continue, because of the opportunity that this had provided. By this point, suffice it to say it was not a pleasant ordeal. However, it was exhilarating, and that prompted me to keep going as well. As I prepared to go to the bathroom, I had to literally convey the message to a bunch of the energy-starved entities that I needed to “time out” to take care of the body that I was in. They shrunk back from my awareness. I went to the bathroom, still aware that they were waiting for me, then went back to my room only to find my cat had entered.
I lay down back on the bed and she was purring loudly, approaching me, pacing, moving away, and coming back. I could sense her presence in a profound way. Evidently, I felt grounded by her presence and was so welcome to this. I was feeling very out of control and shaky, and even days after this trip I can still feel this a little bit, which has been awkward but not frightening. When I was sitting back down on my bed, cat beside me, I had another smoke, and I could see in my mind’s eye that I was in a spiraling tunnel of existing realities, the spiral gateways. Entities and personalities flew around all over the place. Some disappeared into “quicksand”. Others came “out” of the “quicksand” and darted out of my focus. As I looked at my cat, I could see that she could see them as well. Her eyes would suddenly shift in a similar direction to where I felt one of these presences appear. She lay very still as these individuals paraded wherever they needed to, and the whole time I was aware that energy was being conveyed through the one part of my dual awareness.
At one point, the guide even began conversing with one of them, almost as a teacher, explaining to them something I can’t remember. I remember hearing the voice come out of my body. It was not my voice. It was the voice of the guide through me, speaking tenderly to whomever. The guide was very loving. I couldn’t tell if it (or “he”) was my higher self because it felt very much separate from me, yet intricately connected to my being. I was very shaky at this point with almost complete loss of bodily control, but still coherent enough to allow it to happen and pass. I was about ready to have the experience end, but that was to be a ways away yet.
One conversation ended, and I was “allowed” to go get water from the fridge. I did so, came back, and flopped down in a sitting position, candles still lit and cat still present. She was very still, staring at an area above one of the candles. Again, my question was answered before I had even asked, that the candle, fire in general, and the sun, are all temporary and intense gateways of allowing individuals from the network to appear in the physical to a limited degree. In most cases, they are not even detectable, because those that they are trying to present themselves to are not receptive or are incapable of listening, or because their conveyance of energy and messages were not to be detected in the way that we normally think they should be. Shocking, I thought, as it appeared my cat’s attention was very much focused just above the candle. I decided not to interfere.
My attention turned again to starving entities in the spiral gateways. It was endless. One would come, I would feed it, and it would leave. Another would appear as an image of a beautiful feminine figure, we would engage each other for a moment, and then my focus would shift again. Over and over again this kept going while I would revert back to writing text in between. It was as though we were performing healing techniques. This was especially obvious to me when I watched my body do the sitting energy dance. It was like directing traffic of healing light. Non-stop for something like twenty minutes. Even when I wasn’t paying full attention to this I could feel buddy doing this from my mind. I was busy! But I was also quite uncomfortable. So intense, I can’t describe the intensity properly. It was like being pulled over and over again almost to the point of being split, but was never taken to that extreme. I am sure glad for that!
The one time that stands out the most was when one of the spiral gateways came directly into focus, and someone was spiraling into it. They were freaking out, grasping anywhere for energy, and there we were in direct contact with them. As they spiraled inward, we were both conveying pure loving energy to them. I heard the voice come out of me saying “We love you, always. You are blessed forever in your journey into the next. Love is with you. We are here. We are here.” As the entity came to the middle of the spiraling point, this message was repeated. When it reached the middle, it disappeared! The spiral gateway was still there, but no entity. It was explained to me that someone had just been born (into the physical), and we were there to send them off. Now, I don’t know what to say about that. Call it hyperbole, but this is what I saw and what I was told.
Soon after this, the intensity waned a little, and I could focus my concentration on other things. It was like taking a breath for my mind. I rested for a moment, still aware of the spiral gateways, and then focused on a friend of mine in my mind. The dual awareness shifted again as soon as I thought of this person, and it was like I gave permission to the guide to do something about it. He stood me up and went for my cell phone. I stopped and questioned this but was answered in the same fashion as all of my other questions – immediately. He assured me no harm would come to this person in my thoughts, and I trusted him, for I had already seen some amazing things that he had allowed us both to do.
I watched as my hands began writing a text message. The following were not my words, but the words of the guide. I’ve changed the names in this report into single letters:
“This message is coming to you through technology but along with it is a supply of energy. This is why we punctuate properly, because now we don’t have to, in order to get the message across. This is from love in the fourth dimension.”
“From all around YOU ‘S’ we love you always, if you can remember to remember that. We are here, in this place, with you, in privacy, in public. We mean no invasion. Merely the truth to a reality that is now extending its way into your reality. We love you. Always. ‘D’ loves you as well, and conveys this in subtle ways, not obvious ways. He is learning though, in good part due to your help. Again, and as always, with love, from the fourth dimension.”
I have read these two text messages over and over again trying to remember where I was at when they were written, but I can’t. If it was me writing this, it was a non-conscious part of me. I’ve since told “S” this, and everything is fine. Nobody got freaked out. Considering the nature of the message, it looks like it was worthwhile to allow this to happen. It made me realize too that channeling can be a very helpful and uplifting venture. My second question had been answered.
My mind moved to other individuals in my life, and the guide decided to pick up pen and paper and write messages for these individuals, which came out in rough garbled printing as follows:
Hang tight, allow your anger to flow through and out of you in a way that does not disarm anyone around you. You tend to do this. Only you know why you are doing this. We have our suspicions but don’t investigate out of politeness and respect. Have more fun! Respect women’s “irrationalities”. These are messages coming to you to wake up to the question “Why does it bug you?” It’s as if you go around all day asking for reminders because you feel lost in a swirl of energy so intense that it’s hard to wrestle with any of it coming. Best attribute to learn and exercise right now? Patience. You will be hella wiser if you get down n’ dirty with this.”
You’ve forgotten. You’re on the other side but you’ve forgotten why you went there. We try to send you energy but you are immersed in a large pool of regret and the recipient of malice. Do not let these events spiral into you! By mere concentration, you can expel them out. But you have to want that, and you may not be at a place in your life when you’re ready to release. You will need to make this choice. We love you from afar always, if you can remember to remember.”
After a few more sessions of sending energy through the spiral network and a conversation with “someone”, I could feel everything starting to die down, and thankful for that. This conversation included some answers to questions lately on my mind. With respect to the number 42, it was conveyed to me that this is a wake up call. Seeing something repeatedly like a significant number as 42 is, at least for me, a signal to remember my faith in this non-physical reality. Apparently, I need to be reminded often, since I see this number frequently and in synchronistic fashion.
Conversation continued into other arenas. Mainly, it was in the affirmation of the non-physical existence and into the concept of the law of attraction. I was told that we are attracting our reality, and thus creating it, at every observable moment, or thought. We, as human beings, are attracting our reality through our thoughts, and that we need to take responsibility for our thoughts if we want to chart a course of our choosing, individually and collectively. Earth, I was told, is a reality of an enormous number of individual thoughts interacting within one another. During the course of my trip, it was conveyed to me that I had attracted the entire experience by simply thinking about what I wanted to experience. Since I wanted to have certain questions answered, my openness and my use of psilocybin allowed me to attract the experience necessary for that to occur. This is happening at every moment of our existence, and we are all participating in this whether we believe it or not. But we must believe it to make use of it. Our thoughts and desires are coupled with our chosen direction in our present lifetimes to create the realities we are now immersed within. I was told that taking any sort of victim stance (something I have participated in many times) is nothing more than a refusal to choose a direction for one’s reality, and therefore to be subject to the whims and desires of another individual’s chosen reality, through their use of the law of attraction. I was told that this is happening on multiple levels in our society today, whether we are aware of it or not.
As the conversation slowed and quieted, the dual awareness started drifting away and I was back to the physical and in control of my body. There was a lot more going on that I don’t remember. It felt like days had passed in a span of about four hours.
Since this trip, it appears to me very obviously that we are not alone. Not only that, “they” are all around us. They always have been. We just don’t see them. We’ve forgotten that they are there. I can imagine a time on Earth when these entities were always within the awareness of humankind. Certainly it could be said that Shamans are able to tune into these forces. Today, some of the methods for doing this have been reduced to being illegal, and this says something about our culture. We have become incredibly stubborn and absorbed in our collective yet unquestioned agreement that the physical IS the reality. It is not. It is a facet, a learning center – one side of the wormhole of the multiverse.
There were many, many questions of mine answered in this
trip that went beyond the four that I had originally intended. For one, it has
put me face to face with the reality that our human culture, especially in
There also seems to be a strange direction to this unquestioned collectively agreed-upon knowledge set that we have adopted. We have relegated “truth” to experts, leadership, financiers, and religious elements and have forgotten how to organize our information in a way that brings us to REAL truth! We are embedded in a culture that refuses to be questioned, and yet it is us! It is a culture that requires lying in order to continue as it has. It has come into plain sight for me that this money system we are using right now is little more than a hoax, a game, and that the so-called problems we are facing today in our finances, this recession, the government bailouts, and so forth, are problems underneath larger problems that never ever appear in our collectively agreed upon reality because we are too immersed within the surface problems to even realize that there is something underneath. So it goes with the physical and non-physical reality realization.
Please don’t get me wrong here. I am not trying to reduce the human culture or the modern experience. I am just trying to convey an awareness of an experience that has brought me to these realizations. My trip showed me that we need to begin asking some serious questions about what we are doing right now. The guide that came into my body conveyed to me in more than one instance that we are collectively creating this reality called Earth. If our awareness has dwindled to rejecting something that definitely does exist and does have an effect in our lives at every moment we live them, and if our awareness is unable to grasp questions that need to be answered in order to expand, where the hell are we going? Why are we doing this? How can we plot a new, better course? We need to answer this, or face the wrath of the law of attraction in action by individuals using it to create whatever reality they want. And just who are they? They are us! Conspiracy theories have pointed many a finger, but I believe the solution lies not in festering anger towards ones who apparently hold power, but to attract love and openness to something completely different, something we actually want. We have forgotten how to daydream. We’re so busy, no time to think for ourselves. This, I believe, must change.
For me, this whole trip was an awakening upon an awakening, and the most eye-opening experience I have had in my life. I am able to move forward now in my life, comfortably asking questions and seeking truth, in the understanding that we are a beautiful and divine species, and that, through love, kindness, empowerment and awareness, we can create the reality we want to create – together.
The following includes the text written during the trip. I know that some of it is mine, and I can tell that some of it is not. I have typed it up for this report, but the text itself looks incredibly messy.
1 “I can’t believe how intense it feels trying to be a bridge for so much energy. My writing shrinks into tiny morsels as I cascade up and down in energy.”
2 “The feeling right now is like being caught between one passageway and another attempting to cycle energy but it is difficult because of the intensity. Everything repeats on itself. It is difficult to open doors and boundaries.”
3 “The law of attraction is constantly working in the fourth dimension. Are you awake enough to see it? It’s everywhere. No foolin folks! We are here to send you energy in whatever form you need it. That is the promise of service.”
4 “I and the one writing this are in very close proximity now. There is even a time distortion and his body gets in the way, but he tries and says thank you as soon as he writes this in one long unending poetry of the everything.”
5 “I feel many wounded souls out there and I am trying to bridge through all of you to come together to say thank you, in spirals, in humour, in awesomeness, on and on... We can appreciate “forever”, but let’s chart a course.”
6 “In each cycle of time that we experience, there is an incalculable number of entities moving in various ways, it is difficult to bridge. Our bodies and our minds are houses within the houses of the message that cycles into the thought equivalent of a black hole.”
7 “Black holes are merely the enlarged thought matrix hungerers that need energy desperately. We need to allow energy to cycle through us all more openly. You may be in service! That is a beautiful privilege as part of the growing galaxy matrix.”
8 “I am in reverence of all the beauty that has been created, but so much of it is nauseating and distorting, and pulled sharply out of focus. Holding focus requires being open to the flow of energy constantly there.”
9 “This man is in service. He bows to me. Not in any kind of confrontational way. In a welcoming, loving, accepting way, acceptance from…”
10 “We’re in “thought platoons” trying to cycle energy and awareness, being open to the energy may result in some seriously unpleasant shit, but that is the time to breathe deep.”
11 “Some of you are struggling madly with physical “abnormalities”, blips in your paths. We see this. You are all trying to get somewhere but seem very confused as to how you are going to arrive at this, within physicality. This is your challenge! It’s not a mad scramble for safety but there is so much intense energy to navigate through.”
12 “The linear landscape ain’t no grasshopper”
13 “Wake up. The law of attraction is working its way into the infinity of energies, into depths of time we cannot comprehend. We are servants of God sworn to protect and love you through all channels.”
14 “The time between energy being received on one end and extended out the other leaves huge gaps to be filled. Fill them with your spirit and attention, no matter where you are, we are all connected, and the struggle is immense, and so much pain, my god, cycling…”
15 “If you can follow the cycles up and down you tune into where the energy is needed. Writing may not be fast enough to convey the thoughts coming, or the ways that all this energy can be conveyed. It gets to be a big jumble. There is this immense barrier to [illegible] to recycling energy. Our distractions are our ways of latching on to energy.”
16 “We are on one half of the wormhole pulling energy through thought into the next swing. If every action you did was immediately seen by your infinitely-existing peers, what kind of quality would that be?”
17 “You will all be looking back “20 years” from now, gasping “What were we going for??” Where was it heading? Where is everybody? Look, look, 9/11!! Wake up!! Nope…The time for waking up is drawing to a close. Those not awakened will cycle through – the recycler – and that energy will go wherever it is needed.”
18 “The physical reality is a far reaching extension “fractal” of all of the energy that is cycling through the cosmos. The host’s intention for coming into existence was to serve, first, mother and father, and then branch out, thereby earning his respect.”
19 “Ken and Ryu don’t huck fireballs at each other trying to impale one another. They’re sending energy!! They are servants, literally coming through gateways that you will be receptive to hoping you’ll catch on!!”
20 “42 is the conveyor of “wake up” – we’re here!”