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1st trip, was nuts.

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Alright. basically this is what happened. The whole summer my friend and I were trying to find mushrooms. We finally got them at the end of the summer. We had both been in to pot for about a year or 2 and we wanted to try something different. My house was free one saturday night so we decided to plan it out. it would be me, my friend B, my other friend M, and my other friend S (S is a girl). It was about 9:45pm when my friend B and I ate about 1 gram and a half of dried mushrooms, they were white/blue. I guess that is the basic type around where i live. M and S decided to smoke pot and chill instead of shroom because it was my first time, and B's 3rd. Around 10:15 we decided to go for a drive..this is when everything sort of started being weird. My stomach felt as if it were rising, or there was some weird activity going on inside of it. sort of like feeling nervous. Everything seemed to be really funny. lights seemed brighter, and I found myself listening to everything closely. we got to my house at about 10:45, smoked a joint, and ate another 1/2 gram of shrooms. I think this was a mistake on my part because it was my first time. we drank a glass of orange juice, \\\"Heres to hallucinating.\\\" i rememeber B saying. After a few more minutes I started to feel angry/scared. I could only do what my body \\\"Felt it needed\\\" sort of like acting on instincts. I layed down, rolled around the floor, put a pillow on my head. then my friend B told me that if i just got up and did something everything would flow better..thats when i started to freak out..i thought to myself \\\"so nothing is flowing well now?..what if i'm dying?\\\" thats when my heart started to beat fast. nothing could prevent me from thinking about what would happen if everything and everything all at once in my body just stopped. B tried to comfort me by saying that i wanted to do it, and that it was a new experiance and junk. but it didn't work. once i got my senses back together i felt sort of relieved and tryed to make myself calm down. this did work once in a while. its hard because you have to concentrate on everything good and wonderful in the world to shake the bad trip. even then i felt certain times of sadness and despair because my friends were all bugging out. they thought i was crazy. i was doing alright with myself for now, i had to take a few moments by myself to chill out. after a another 30 minutes of talking and feeling everything out we went outside and layed on the ground and watched the stars. This made me feel soo good. everything in my brain just clicked and everything in the world made sense sort of a feeling of euphoria, like everything will work out. i can only describe it like if you were froto baggins, just opening your mind to all the knowledge and mystery of gandolf. it was spectacular. the shrooms started kicking in now. i saw some visuals like moving fast sort of like in the matrix. the conversations we had were so rad. we talked about being psychic and communicating with the dead, and finding your calling in life. after a while everything seemed to make more sense. my favorite part of the trip was at the end, when i could still see some slight visuals but nothing was too too intense. reality was taking affect, i blew my nose, went to the bathroom, etc. once everyone was gone i found myself really bored i walked around my house for 2 hours pretending i was like some cosmic super hero. the trip lasted just about 6 hours. It was extremely intense for me. There were times I felt really uncomfortable, and just really sad and angry about who i was and how shitty life could be. i felt alone, and wanted to die. there were other times where i thought i was a genius and everything clicked because my brain was connecting w/ everyone elses. in the end i thought about the drug i had taken and the experiance i had. it was not a great trip. i was really scared during parts of it, however i was glad i was around my friends and not alone. but thanks for reading.

\\\"though the course my change sometimes, rivers always reach the sea\\\"
- zeppelin

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