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 thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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 Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. 
#15798678 - 02/12/12 06:32 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Okay so here's the background to the story:
This girl and I met freshman year at our college. We were in a writing seminar together and we sat next to each other and worked together on paper topics and such. We had an immediate interest in one another, and it was obvious to both of us. Alas, she had a boyfriend at the time, and I also came to find out that she was a very, very, very devout Christian.
I was somewhat of an agnostic at the time, and her religious beliefs did not bother me. I did the typical college hookups and stuff freshman year, but she and I remained occasional friends.
The next year we were in a psych. course together. We came to know each other better this year as we often studied together.
The following is an insight as to this girl's character and undeniably present attraction between us:
It was cold out, and she was wearing a scarf when we started studying. A few minutes into our session she took off the scarf, unveiling her most glorious cleavage. I was drinking heavily (often) and smoking lots of marijuana at this point in my life, so in my perpetual mindfuck I made the mistake of blatantly staring at her chest for about five minutes. When she noticed (or maybe just had had enough?) she scarfed up once more.
But after a few moments of prolonged and flirty eye contact, the scarf was removed! The bountiful bosoms blossomed once more, as if a reward for my good behavior!
Nevertheless, her old relationship was still alive. Still, I appreciated the opportunity to establish what I call a "seed" with this girl. Maybe not now, but sometime later this thing can grow.
And so it did. That winter I entered a psych ward after having a really intense mystical experience. It sucked, but it was important as it led me to more closely look into religion and in so doing possibly establish some more common ground with this girl. She, too, had had experiences like mine, though perhaps not as intense or confusing as she doesn't do drugs and believes in God.
So we start going on coffee dates, virtually spilling our guts to each other over caffeine. By the time I went home that semester she knew me and I knew her.
First thing that happened the next school year: Breakup. I was in!!! And I knew it. So we start doing the coffee thing some more. Before long, we are virtually in love. Walking through the woods on campus one night, she says to me, "Isn't this romantic?" Thereafter, I sealed the deal by singing to her. We liked each other without a doubt at this point.
Problem was, I couldn't bring myself to ask her out on account of her religion. Having dismissed my previous mystical experience as a merely psychiatric episode, I abandoned belief in the possibility of God. Curiously, I still clung to notions of aliens and a Terence Mckennian style "hyperspace."
In an effort to figure out for myself what I believed and also in order to get closer to the girl, I eventually decide to check out the church she goes to ... Satan and demons were the topic that day. 
Although unimpressed with her church, I was piqued by her notions pertaining to God, as she was capable of pseudointellectual conversations by way of her knowledge of the Bible. I still identified as an agnostic atheist at this point, but that was soon to change, in part because of my relationship with this girl and also in part of my taking Metaphysics that semester.
Over time I start to arrive at a notion of God that makes sense, and that I can ultimately not deny in light of my first mystical experience. Unbeknownst to me, another such experience lay ahead. Shortly after accepting theism, I felt a divine presence in the girl's church one Sunday: The spirit of Jesus. Thus, I "came to Christ."
Now the strange part here is that I didn't even know what the hell just happened. So surreal, and so strange to think that I could ever become a Christian. Further, I wondered what kind of Christian I could be believing the things I believe. I don't regard the Bible as the "Word of God" like fundamentalists do, and I believe in things like physics and evolution and the possibility of reincarnation and an afterlife not bound to a strict Heaven and Hell, etc. I knew that at this point if I was going to date this girl I had to get my shit straight. Which meant cutting out pot and growing more confident in my faith.
The next semester I decide to ask her out. I bought her tickets to her favorite band's concert, not specifying it as a date but assuming that it was understood. Although I confessed to her that my beliefs did not coincide with hers and the orthodox faith's, I thought I could be more comfortable dating her at this point and decided to pursue her more directly.
Not two weeks into classes I saw her getting all friendly with this scrawny douchebag who's a year younger than we are. This confused me and worried me, so I called her that evening to ask her out on a date between then and the concert to make my motives more clear.
"Wait, do you mean dinner like a date?"
"Uh, yeah ..."
"Well, I'm kind of dating S. ..."
"Kind of?"
"No, not kind of, I shouldn't have said that, that was stupid. We're dating."
"... Well do you want to go on a date with me?"
"... No, I don't think that would be appropriate ..."
"Ok ..."
"It's nothing personal."
"I'm not taking anything personally."
"Good."
"Let me know if anything changes."
"I will."
One of the weirder conversations of my life.
And that's that.
TL;DR A confused, philosophically-minded man trying to discover his religion is falling in love. In his efforts to become a more Godly person, he waits to refine his character and beliefs before making the lady of his eye his girlfriend. The woman, however, crushes the man's heart by misinterpreting him and thinking he is not interested in her romantically. She finds a different person, and our hero is condemned to lonesomeness.
Lesson? Don't pursue hardcore religious girls.
Edited by thefloodbehind (02/13/12 12:44 AM)
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes
Registered: 05/07/08
Posts: 4,161
Last seen: 9 hours, 16 minutes
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind]
#15799525 - 02/12/12 09:13 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Wow. So? Where do your beliefs stand now?
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qman
Stranger
Registered: 12/07/06
Posts: 3,518
Last seen: 3 hours, 1 minute
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: Sleepwalker]
#15799593 - 02/12/12 09:25 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Wow, talk about a shitty return on investment, seems like a ton of wasted time with no sex involved, talk about learning the hard way. Who really cares what the girl believes, your in college, hook up with the bitches.
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kiss_the_sky03
human being
Registered: 08/19/05
Posts: 1,264
Loc: where I want
Last seen: 26 minutes, 3 seconds
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: qman]
#15799627 - 02/12/12 09:32 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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I could have told you this
and...Quote:
qman said:
Who really cares what the girl believes, you're in college, hook up with the bitches.
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: Sleepwalker]
#15800417 - 02/13/12 12:11 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Wow. So? Where do your beliefs stand now?
I'm a panentheist. I have an affinity towards gnosticism but I can't truly call myself a gnostic. The details of my metaphysical beliefs change so often they're hard to really encapsulate, but I definitely believe in God. I call myself a Christian, but I'm pretty sure a lot of orthodox believers would say I'm not.
My notion of God is more like the Hindu concept of an impersonal oneness, but rather than praying to various deities I pray directly to God, sometimes going through Jesus, i.e., "in Jesus name I pray, Amen."
My view on religion is pretty Jungian, i.e., religion is a system of (often metaphorical) myths that can be seen to parallel various goings on in the human psyche. Jung identified as a Christian but many people think of him as a heretic, or worse, a disciple of Satan. My understanding is that "Satan" is a metaphor for our darker motives, and although I concede the possibility of malevolent spiritual entities existing, I don't think giving them all the attention Christians give Satan is the way to go as this would seem to make them more influential. If God is more powerful and wiser than Satan—which is akin to asking if love and goodness are more significant to our reality than fear and depravity—why should we be so overtly concerned with him?
In short, God is love; love is real.
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: qman]
#15800444 - 02/13/12 12:14 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
qman said:
Wow, talk about a shitty return on investment, seems like a ton of wasted time with no sex involved, talk about learning the hard way. Who really cares what the girl believes, your in college, hook up with the bitches.
Ik, ik. I just thought I might have found a real diamond.
I realize now that I need a girl with a dark side. Getting with random hoes is not my bag, what I really want is a complete freak that I can keep for myself.
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claraclairvoyant
well oiled machine
Registered: 05/24/09
Posts: 5,923
Last seen: 11 days, 18 hours
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind] 2
#15800471 - 02/13/12 12:18 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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I read your entire post but I fail to see how her religion has anything to do with what ended up happening (or..NOT happening) with you two.
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 facepockets
In Search of Equilibrium
Registered: 10/31/11
Posts: 262
Loc: 5b
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind]
#15800539 - 02/13/12 12:26 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
thefloodbehind said:
Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Wow. So? Where do your beliefs stand now?
I'm a panentheist. I have an affinity towards gnosticism but I can't truly call myself a gnostic. The details of my metaphysical beliefs change so often they're hard to really encapsulate, but I definitely believe in God. I call myself a Christian, but I'm pretty sure a lot of orthodox believers would say I'm not.
My notion of God is more like the Hindu concept of an impersonal oneness, but rather than praying to various deities I pray directly to God, sometimes going through Jesus, i.e., "in Jesus name I pray, Amen."
My view on religion is pretty Jungian, i.e., religion is a system of (often metaphorical) myths that can be seen to parallel various goings on in the human psyche. Jung identified as a Christian but many people think of him as a heretic, or worse, a disciple of Satan. My understanding is that "Satan" is a metaphor for our darker motives, and although I concede the possibility of malevolent spiritual entities existing, I don't think giving them all the attention Christians give Satan is the way to go as this would seem to make them more influential. If God is more powerful and wiser than Satan—which is akin to asking if love and goodness are more significant to our reality than fear and depravity—why should we be so overtly concerned with him?
In short, God is love; love is real.
I'm beginning to develop a similar perspective on the whole of
religion. Are you acquainted with the writings of Joseph Campbell?
I'm currently reading The Hero with a Thousand Faces, and it is the
main reason for my evolving view.
Years ago I accepted that there was some sort of "God" figure, though
I understand it more as an energy force that permeates all of matter.
I've always been interested in science, and am nearing graduation with a major in chemistry, but I understand that nothing in this world can be truly objective.
At least you made changes that you still feel are positive, despite not getting what you expected. The way of the world.
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Quote:
claraclairvoyant said:
I read your entire post but I fail to see how her religion has anything to do with what ended up happening (or..NOT happening) with you two.
She was and is a pure and extremely faithful person whereas I was a pot smoking and hard drinking occasional tripper/man whore who didn't believe in God. The reason I started getting closer with her in the first place was because of my confusion regarding spiritual and religious matters. Most of our conversations ended up getting back to God and metaphysical or theological topics.
This probably misled her into thinking that my interest in her and her beliefs and experiences was just an interest in Christianity, and she was doing what she thought was right by telling me more about it and being a good "witness."
Sorry if that wasn't clear.
Edited by thefloodbehind (02/13/12 12:37 AM)
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind]
#15800577 - 02/13/12 12:31 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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btw i started smoking regularly again after the whole situation was over. lol. rasta!
quit drinking, though. psychedelics are still gonna happen some more, but not so much as i'm trying to graduate as soon as i can and don't need any more distractions than i already have.
Edited by thefloodbehind (02/13/12 12:39 AM)
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: facepockets]
#15800602 - 02/13/12 12:35 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
facepockets said:
Quote:
thefloodbehind said:
Quote:
Sleepwalker said:
Wow. So? Where do your beliefs stand now?
I'm a panentheist. I have an affinity towards gnosticism but I can't truly call myself a gnostic. The details of my metaphysical beliefs change so often they're hard to really encapsulate, but I definitely believe in God. I call myself a Christian, but I'm pretty sure a lot of orthodox believers would say I'm not.
My notion of God is more like the Hindu concept of an impersonal oneness, but rather than praying to various deities I pray directly to God, sometimes going through Jesus, i.e., "in Jesus name I pray, Amen."
My view on religion is pretty Jungian, i.e., religion is a system of (often metaphorical) myths that can be seen to parallel various goings on in the human psyche. Jung identified as a Christian but many people think of him as a heretic, or worse, a disciple of Satan. My understanding is that "Satan" is a metaphor for our darker motives, and although I concede the possibility of malevolent spiritual entities existing, I don't think giving them all the attention Christians give Satan is the way to go as this would seem to make them more influential. If God is more powerful and wiser than Satan—which is akin to asking if love and goodness are more significant to our reality than fear and depravity—why should we be so overtly concerned with him?
In short, God is love; love is real.
I'm beginning to develop a similar perspective on the whole of
religion. Are you acquainted with the writings of Joseph Campbell?
I'm currently reading The Hero with a Thousand Faces, and it is the
main reason for my evolving view.
Years ago I accepted that there was some sort of "God" figure, though
I understand it more as an energy force that permeates all of matter.
I've always been interested in science, and am nearing graduation with a major in chemistry, but I understand that nothing in this world can be truly objective.
At least you made changes that you still feel are positive, despite not getting what you expected. The way of the world.
i'll have to check that book out.
you sound like you may be somewhat of a spinozist, not that i'm trying to trivialize the matter with jargon. it's funny because i was talking about my ideas in class and my professor tells me, "yeah, that's what spinoza says." and i've never even read spinoza. i come to find out a few weeks later that einstein believed in the God of spinoza. i'm looking forward to learning more about him in one of my classes this semester.
Edited by thefloodbehind (02/13/12 12:41 AM)
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facepockets
In Search of Equilibrium
Registered: 10/31/11
Posts: 262
Loc: 5b
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind]
#15800615 - 02/13/12 12:38 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Yeah, definitely don't ditch the good drugs just cause your blinded by
some potential booty. But the insights that the booty may inspire should
not be ignored.
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facepockets
In Search of Equilibrium
Registered: 10/31/11
Posts: 262
Loc: 5b
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind]
#15800628 - 02/13/12 12:40 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
thefloodbehind said:
you sound like you may be somewhat of a spinozist, not that i'm trying trivialize the matter with jargon. it's funny because i was talking about my ideas in class and my professor tells me, "yeah, that's what spinoza says." and i've never even read spinoza. i come to find out a few weeks later that einstein believed in the God of spinoza. i'm looking forward to learning more about him in one of my classes this semester.
Hmmm, never heard of the man, either. But you inspire further
research. And I prefer the inspiration that doesn't come packaged
with ultimately defeating promises of booty.
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: facepockets]
#15800630 - 02/13/12 12:41 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
facepockets said:
Yeah, definitely don't ditch the good drugs just cause your blinded by
some potential booty. But the insights that the booty may inspire should
not be ignored.
yep, i've made my peace with it even though it didn't work out as i hoped. my experience with her is perfectly exemplary of this quote by voltaire: "all the reasonings of men are not worth one sentiment of women."
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All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber
Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 7,741
Loc: colorado
Last seen: 1 hour, 38 minutes
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind] 1
#15801500 - 02/13/12 04:32 AM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Sounds more like you failed to make a move and she went to someone else. Don't see the relevance of religion.
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
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XUL
Optimist
Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 7,682
Last seen: 2 days, 5 hours
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Quote:
Lesson? Don't pursue hardcore religious girls.
Sounds to me like the girl was wearing the pants here.
You catered to her needs like a little puppy sitting to get a milk bone.
Maybe you did have a religious experience. And maybe this is the lord slapping you in the face and yelling wake up, think for yourself, and concentrate on your career.
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thefloodbehind
Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 898
Loc: Nashville, TN
Last seen: 3 months, 26 days
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Quote:
XUL said:
Quote:
Lesson? Don't pursue hardcore religious girls.
Sounds to me like the girl was wearing the pants here.
You catered to her needs like a little puppy sitting to get a milk bone.
Maybe you did have a religious experience. And maybe this is the lord slapping you in the face and yelling wake up, think for yourself, and concentrate on your career.
Quote:
All We Perceive said:
Sounds more like you failed to make a move and she went to someone else. Don't see the relevance of religion.
I don't think I was clear enough at first. It was very much a Beauty and the Beast-type situation. (If you've seen the Disney film you know what I'm talking about.) Had she been a shebeast I would have had no problem making a move. Not sure if it would ever be a serious relationship, but I have no problem getting with more raw, sexually driven girls.
Because of her purity and religiosity, I pedestalized this girl. I am a lustful man, and I knew that would not fly with her. I should have known better, but I thought it might work out.
Not that it's a big deal, anyway. Just thought I'd point out that piety in a romantic interest can cause you to conjure up all sorts of mind games. As I said, I now understand more clearly that I need a girl with a dark side, who's not afraid to shy away from her more animal and thus non-spiritual motives.
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a2thej
Cosmic Cowboy
Registered: 07/21/11
Posts: 666
Loc: Desert
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: thefloodbehind] 1
#15802330 - 02/13/12 12:31 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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u should have just been quicker to ask her out on a date u waited too long so perhaps she said fuck it
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: a2thej]
#15802546 - 02/13/12 01:45 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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I never let God get in the way of pussy.
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 4,165
Last seen: 16 hours, 29 minutes
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Re: Don't pursue hardcore Christian girls. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#15802683 - 02/13/12 02:20 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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I could never love a christian. My parents are the only exception and that's a little slim.  Any other religion i'm okay with
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Your god is dead, and i killed him.
The moment you refuse the human rights for just a few, what happens when that view includes you?-Chuck D.
The X I got won't find you treasure, it'll leave you rollin so hard you leave in a stretcher-Chris Webby
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