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 Connoisseur
sideline observer
 
Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 7,824
Loc: LI
Last seen: 2 months, 2 days
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 Re: dirtiest/weirdest shit you've done sexually  [Re: greencavefloat]
#15871989 - 02/27/12 08:05 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
greencavefloat said:
Quote:
fee said:
I lol'd!
Best pic on the shroomery
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 fee
Im he who is the
Registered: 01/16/03
Posts: 13,233
Loc: amsterdam
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Re: dirtiest/weirdest shit you've done sexually [Re: Connoisseur]
#15872653 - 02/27/12 09:59 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Your welcome.
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Wiccan_Seeker said:
Have you actually seen what poledancers do?
Its not subjective, it IS erotic activity.
There are more practical ways to slide down a pole than with your legs spread and using your pussy as a brake. Ask the fire department.
[quote]fapjack said:
My grandma always said I"'d rather have a rock hard acorn being drilled into me by a man, than some soggy baguette being flicked into me by a fairy."[/quote]
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Anonymous #36
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Re: dirtiest/weirdest shit you've done sexually [Re: fee]
#15873862 - 02/28/12 01:13 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Not really dirty but def a bit kinky.
Now i'm black, and there are older some young white married men that like to give up their wives to bulls (black dudes), to watch their wives be pleasured or dominated (black cock slut) and in some cases clean up (fletches) his wife's pussy. Of course the catch is that the hubby usually wants to watch (wank in the corner) while I fuck is wife. Creepy at first but those fuckers love that shit - they even encourage me to creampie (breed) their wives.
Of course there is a huge racial aspect in all of this, and at first it kinda bothered me but i've been having the sex of my life with these women. Seriously, these women are sexual beast, we'll fuck for hours then they'll pick up their kids from the grandparents and take'em to a soccer game - aint that some shit! Plus their husbands usually ask if I have any other black friends that "would be down" (dudes with big ding dongs)- I swear white folks are awesome and crazy at the same time (know how to have fun).
Edited by Anonymous (03/02/12 09:06 AM)
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Anonymous #37
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Re: dirtiest/weirdest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #36]
#15888815 - 03/02/12 03:46 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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ur point is ur hoping to peak someones interest. u dirty dirty man. shame on you. surprised u didnt leave n email.  :
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Phenom
Stranger
Registered: 02/07/12
Posts: 382
Last seen: 4 days, 8 hours
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Re: dirtiest/weirdest shit you've done sexually [Re: thoughts]
#16275703 - 05/23/12 11:54 PM (11 months, 21 days ago) |
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Quote:
iwasaClown said:
Quote:
Society said:
Quote:
iwasaClown said:
I had a girl i was dating call me while she was taking a shit once. She actually told me she was taking a shit.
I remember telling her something like "WTF is wrong with you?" and hanging up.
I don't get it. What's wrong with this? Are you not comfortable enough to recognize the bodily needs of your loved ones?
I shit while I'm on the phone all the time. I'm a stealthy speed pooper, so they never know (and I don't mention it).
I've actually even been in the bathroom while my girlfriend shit. I left as soon as I smelled it though.
I dunno man, maybe i'm just weird like that.
I didn't really love the girl to begin with anyway, so
that must've had something to do with it.
And i think taking a shit is some pretty personal stuff, i don't want to know about it or hear turds hitting the water while i'm trying to eat.
I laughed my ass off at this ahaha, it's like some random post from a year ago.
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Anonymous #38
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: rodfarva]
#16276252 - 05/24/12 01:26 AM (11 months, 21 days ago) |
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Quote:
rodfarva said:
Quote:
BothHands said:
Quote:
yogabunny said:
i discovered that there were pleasant sensations down there from a jet in a pool.
I had definitely done that lots of times before my first orgasm, but I was never in the pool alone long enough. But I had been humping stuffed animals since long before that.
But it wasn't actually a Jacuzzi. It was a single bathtub in a very fancy hotel room that had jets with bubbles. The bubbles make the difference. Not only bubbles though, water and bubbles. The kind that makes your back itch if you sit against it too long.
I had absolutely no idea what happened, and I didn't think I could do it without a Jacuzzi jet. So that was my first and last orgasm for a good 3 years.
Whooo, I haven't had port in a forever. Forgot how much I liked it. 
Hottest post in the thread ^ lmao... you can take a shower here sometime.
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larae
Stranger
Registered: 05/05/13
Posts: 1
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: pfxtc]
#18217054 - 05/05/13 11:26 AM (16 days, 12 hours ago) |
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Does anyone read this anymore? I have some stories to tell.....
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 pwnasaurus
Stranger
Registered: 07/16/08
Posts: 8,285
Loc: Canada 
Last seen: 1 minute, 35 seconds
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: larae] 1
#18217127 - 05/05/13 11:46 AM (16 days, 12 hours ago) |
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You just bumped a year old thread to ask that? The least you can do is contribute.
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Anonymous #39
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: larae]
#18217448 - 05/05/13 01:25 PM (16 days, 10 hours ago) |
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Quote:
larae said:
Does anyone read this anymore? I have some stories to tell.....
im reading it now haha
i'll contribute. One time when drunk with my girlfriend i convinced her to let me pee into her mouth in the shower 
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Anonymous #40
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #39]
#18220466 - 05/06/13 01:31 AM (15 days, 22 hours ago) |
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This isn't really dirty, but it is pretty skanky.
When I was in my early twenties, I was staying in a cheap motel outside of Philly. I was sitting on the bed watching TV, when there was a knock on the door. When I opened the door, there was a 17 year old kid who asked me "if I wanted some company" I did.
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vandago
Submarine
Registered: 07/08/04
Posts: 9,024
Loc: Eastern standard time, US...
Last seen: 4 days, 12 hours
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Anonymous #40] 2
#18268208 - 05/15/13 01:05 PM (6 days, 10 hours ago) |
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Ok so I am resurrecting this thread on account of this weekends epic shitty experience. The person on the giving end of this may read this.....I won't name any names......identity is safe of course.
SOOOOO I am camping all last weekend. Saturday night rolls around and I am pretty well gone at this point....mostly from lack of sleep and malnutrition I'd say. I am rolling pretty hard as well.
An old friend I haven't seen in a long time comes and we start hanging out.....one thing leads to another....we end up in a tent.
I remember having sex.....then I don't know what happened....I didn't cum.....I just passed out.....I awoke to a horrid odor.
Apparently this girl shit sleeps......I looked over and there was a full shopping bag of shitty toilet paper next to us.
I went and stood by the fire and looked down at myself.
I was covered.
From the waste down on me.
My pants were just caked in it.
I stripped them off and threw them on the ground.....went to my car and grabbed shorts and a t shirt ( its 40 degrees ) and the shut my trunk with my keys in it.
Goddamn....covered in poo.....freezing my nuts off.
I ended up using my car antenna to unlock my car door and get the keys out of the trunk.....I didn't even wake her. I just left her in my tent with my blanket and pillow, and left my clothes on the ground.
I've damn near done it all with a woman now ladies and gentlemen. Damn near.
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Tons of glass art for sale. Pm me for prices. Shipping free within the US
http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/17246001/fpart/1/vc/1
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Tripsurfer
Surfing Yogi
Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 668
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: vandago]
#18268564 - 05/15/13 02:39 PM (6 days, 9 hours ago) |
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So what she shat on you in her sleep or did you have like an epic shitsession together?
Once fucked this chick with a yeast infection; the smell made us both sick 
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Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros...
A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.
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vandago
Submarine
Registered: 07/08/04
Posts: 9,024
Loc: Eastern standard time, US...
Last seen: 4 days, 12 hours
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Tripsurfer]
#18268957 - 05/15/13 04:07 PM (6 days, 7 hours ago) |
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Quote:
Tripsurfer said:
So what she shat on you in her sleep or did you have like an epic shitsession together?
Once fucked this chick with a yeast infection; the smell made us both sick
No one knows. I don't remember anything except having sex.....I can't remember what happened next....and just woke up covered in poo, in a poo covered tent.
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Tons of glass art for sale. Pm me for prices. Shipping free within the US
http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/17246001/fpart/1/vc/1
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FishOilTheKid
Abducted
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Posts: 3,045
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: vandago]
#18269048 - 05/15/13 04:24 PM (6 days, 7 hours ago) |
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The most fucked up thing I've heard in a while. Did you talk to her about it when she woke up in the poo...??
And WTF a bag full of shit wipe? What was she doing wiping her ass all night placing it in the bag and shitting everywhere at the same time?
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HeadTripVertigo
at least I'm housebroken
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 10,674
Last seen: 6 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: vandago]
#18269216 - 05/15/13 04:57 PM (6 days, 6 hours ago) |
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you seem to be graced with an illustrious sex life.
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TACOS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER
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teamkiller
It was ahmazing
Registered: 06/06/11
Posts: 4,413
Last seen: 51 seconds
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Vandago goes hard. How many of you can share a story like that? no one. (excluding people who consciously and voluntarily are into that sort of thing)
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"visual chaos" should not panic. Not encourage fierce attention patterns. !
All the extraordinary - a fantasy deceived serotonin receptors.
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frylock91
Registered: 07/25/10
Posts: 8,369
Loc: Richmond, VA 
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: teamkiller]
#18269554 - 05/15/13 06:00 PM (6 days, 5 hours ago) |
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I mean, I've been pooped on by accident before..But I wasn't covered in it while sleeping with a shit assed girl.
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Sheekle
Extreme Drama Whore
Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 9,189
Last seen: 1 day, 1 hour
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: frylock91]
#18269675 - 05/15/13 06:18 PM (6 days, 5 hours ago) |
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Quote:
frylock91 said:
I mean, I've been pooped on by accident before.
What? Like, by a human? How does somebody accidentally shit on you?
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frylock91
Registered: 07/25/10
Posts: 8,369
Loc: Richmond, VA
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: Sheekle]
#18269692 - 05/15/13 06:20 PM (6 days, 5 hours ago) |
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My cock was too fat for that bitches butthole so she pooped on it cuz of the gape. That's how.
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millzy
Registered: 05/12/10
Posts: 6,708
Last seen: 14 minutes, 37 seconds
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Re: dirtiest shit you've done sexually [Re: frylock91]
#18270232 - 05/15/13 08:05 PM (6 days, 3 hours ago) |
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yeah, i've had one incident where i gave a chick anal and hit brownies. didn't notice it until after i finished. i felt bad for her and didn't make a big deal out of the fact that her entire ass looked like she had sat in a chocolate cake.
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It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.- Philip K. Dick
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