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Anonymous #1
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Guys focus too much on making girls cum.
#13523876 - 11/22/10 01:37 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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SO, I am with this guy for a while now and he is an- I can't even describe it-AMAZING lover. His hands, mouth and penis=awesome.
I have told him he has a nice cock many, many times.
I only have one complaint.
He likes to make me cum. Not just orally, but he has to make me cum with his penis or he will hurt himself trying to stop himself from coming too soon so that I can get off too.
Even if we have wildly passionate sex for a few hours, if I don't cum, he is frustrated.
I enjoy coming as much as the next girl, and it used to be so easy, but now I have all this pressure and it has gotten to where it is one of the first things I think about during sex and it often times keeps me from cuming.
I don't want to have to cum, I just want to have sex and have fun! For me, the journey is more fun than the destination by a long shot. I love sex, I would have sex 15 times a day if I could. All kinds of sex too. But the fun is wearing off because he won't just roll with it. It's always respectful and goal oriented.  He doesn't get it that I LOVE 5 minute (or 2 fucking minute) quickies where he gets off and we get up and go. He says he doesn't want to objectify me or leave me feeling used. But I know he loves me and could never feel this way. To me, even if he is all BDSM and calling me a dirty slut,(wouldn't that be fun?) we are still making love because we love each other. Plus, I don't mind being objectified, I like it on occasion. Plus, if he is horny, and I am there, why should he have to jack off? PLUS!!!! (nah, I don't have anything else) He would not be comfortable with me talking about our sex life with friends, but I am pretty sure he doesn't mind me discussing it with complete strangers.
Hopefully you guys can help me out?
Why does he act this way and is there anything I can do to help him become less of a gentleman about it so that we can fuck all the time without question? Thanks guys!
Shroomery
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wildernessjunkie
Do Good Asshole



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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13523914 - 11/22/10 01:43 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Maybe try faking it? That may be a little weird to plan it like that, but if it works. Seems like dude is considerate enough, and is trying to make you happy. He wants to please you and I think thats a good thing. I know for me as a guy, if I cant get a woman off then thats a major blow to MY ego. I imagine that its probably a necessary part of sex for him.
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Salvia is like that malicious carnival ride operator, the one that sees you getting sick and not having a good time. But the ride you paid for is 5 minutes long...and you WILL get all 5 minutes.
BUTEven the bad trips, are positive when taken in the proper perspective.CLICK HERE TO LEARN THE TRUTH ABOUT DRUGS
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Anonymous #1
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Nah, I can't fake it. I would prolly confess it the minute we were done. 
So, it's an ego thang, hmm?
......
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes


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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13524103 - 11/22/10 02:16 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Fake orgasms, that's a huge turn-off.  And unless you're a really, really good actress, he will probably sniff it out.
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Sleepwalker
Overshoes


Registered: 05/07/08
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Sleepwalker]
#13524108 - 11/22/10 02:17 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Remind him that you aren't porn stars, just do whatcha enjoy naturally.
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meams
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 17,500
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Sleepwalker]
#13524409 - 11/22/10 03:24 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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OP: are you my girlfriend?
haha jk. i don't focus on her getting off so much to the point of hurting myself or causing undue strain ---- but her getting off is usually goal #1 in the sack.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: meams]
#13524488 - 11/22/10 03:42 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Busted. jj
I am starting to get it now. It has more to do with him than me..... But what if the girl doesn't care much about getting off? God it sounds so cliche; I like the cuddling and stuff. Rough, dirty sex is good too, I just don't care about cummming. Am I a strange girl? I assumed most girls were like this. I have tried talking to him and explaining this but I think he thinks I am FOS or something.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#13524751 - 11/22/10 04:38 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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all you have to do is tell him what you want. he seems to enjoy giving you what you want, he just thinks you want to come. tell him what you want, very simple.
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wildernessjunkie
Do Good Asshole



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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13524787 - 11/22/10 04:47 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:

Busted. jj
I am starting to get it now. It has more to do with him than me..... But what if the girl doesn't care much about getting off? God it sounds so cliche; I like the cuddling and stuff. Rough, dirty sex is good too, I just don't care about cummming. Am I a strange girl? I assumed most girls were like this. I have tried talking to him and explaining this but I think he thinks I am FOS or something.
I dont think you're strange. And I think it does have more to do with him than you. But to some guys (me included) part of sex is to please your partner. Maybe you could explain exactly what it is that gives you pleasure when having sex. Maybe his idea of what you enjoy most can be changed. As long as you get pleasure/satisfaction that may replace his need to make you cum.
-------------------- My Trade List
My Philosophy on Trades
VVV Free Active/Edible/Exotic Spore Print or Syringe or Edible Culture Thread VVV
Salvia is like that malicious carnival ride operator, the one that sees you getting sick and not having a good time. But the ride you paid for is 5 minutes long...and you WILL get all 5 minutes.
BUTEven the bad trips, are positive when taken in the proper perspective.CLICK HERE TO LEARN THE TRUTH ABOUT DRUGS
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks guys! These are great POV's.
I have told him several times that I enjoy the whole ride more than the climax, but he doesn't seem to believe/understand.
Maybe I am doing it the wrong way/wrong time.
I will try to step by step explain what really does turn me on. Maybe that will help divert his attention from the goal he wants to score.
Thanks again! You guys.
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meams
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 17,500
Loc: In a Tree
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13525514 - 11/22/10 07:09 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Personally, I focus a lot on making my girl cum becuase of the way past relationships have panned out. Basically: i was a shitty lay in the past, and that relationship panned out pretty badly, so now i just equate her non-orgasm as a potential contributant to any future decline in the quality of our relationship.
I know its not that way (not to mention that i'm a great fuck now), but its how my brain is programmed.
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carcharias
Rorschach

Registered: 11/16/10
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13525564 - 11/22/10 07:18 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Am I a strange girl? I assumed most girls were like this.
They are.
-------------------- Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said "Goodbye" and you were like "No way!" And then I was all "We pretended we were going to murder you?" That was great!
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killersneakers
King

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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13525712 - 11/22/10 07:44 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
meams said: OP: are you my girlfriend?
haha jk. i don't focus on her getting off so much to the point of hurting myself or causing undue strain ---- but her getting off is usually goal #1 in the sack.

that is the point.
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Shroomerette
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: carcharias]
#13526711 - 11/22/10 10:44 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
carcharias said:
Quote:
Anonymous said:
Am I a strange girl? I assumed most girls were like this.
They are.
Yeah, agreed. You seem pretty normal to me. Your plan sounds good though, good luck.
-------------------- Leaving the shroomery forever
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fazdazzle
Wanderer


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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Sleepwalker]
#13527325 - 11/23/10 12:58 AM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Oweyervishice said: Fake orgasms, that's a huge turn-off.  And unless you're a really, really good actress, he will probably sniff it out.
Not to mention a true orgasm in a girl is a major, major, major turn on for me...I have no idea if this is true for all guys, but maybe it is for him
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ToiletDuk
Child of the Corn



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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13527782 - 11/23/10 03:09 AM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Sit him down and tell him what you posted here. I think that may help a bit.
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p4kSouL
Animals Are Cool

Registered: 01/13/05
Posts: 3,654
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: ToiletDuk]
#13527792 - 11/23/10 03:12 AM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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I have a similar situation with last Gf, seems she didnt really care about squirting orgasms, i could make her squirt but i was like "yes objective complete she is having the best orgasm, but still why isnt she as impressed as i though" turns out she wanted to pleasure me just as much or something. Or it gave her pleasure to pleasure me.. Weird.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: p4kSouL]
#13529639 - 11/23/10 02:58 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Well guys,
Just popping in to let you know that I took your advice and we got to talk last night. I focused on telling him all of the things that REALLY turn me on all at once, instead of just random comments here and there. I didn't even bring the cumming issue up, I just focused on convincing him to play around and touch more.
It was


By the end I was like
Wow, I am still reeling from the experience, when I allow my mind to go there. It's usually good, but.....DAMN, SON!
Yeah, I gotta go get ready for the encore. You guys are so awesome. You all get five from me. But it will have to be in a few days so as not to reveal my secret indemnity(rugrats reference, I'm a total dweeb. lol).
Thanks again, worked like a charm. I came alot too! 
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meams
Blessed



Registered: 01/11/05
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#13530250 - 11/23/10 04:39 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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glad to hear it.
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Distorted Vision
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Re: Guys focus too much on making girls cum. [Re: meams]
#13531189 - 11/23/10 07:18 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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Soo u didnt wanna cumm... then in the end your happy, and say you cummed a lot... Alrighty then. (Women... ,Am I right guys?)
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