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 fapjack
I had sex with your dad
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 10,808
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 20 minutes, 21 seconds
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 Re: First time getting fucked  [Re: blazenn]
#12635384 - 05/27/10 12:58 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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I can't believe I got anyone, that was a horrible troll. I was just joking around.
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 blazenn
rawdog the whale.
Registered: 05/13/09
Posts: 4,584
Loc: 
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: fapjack]
#12635419 - 05/27/10 01:01 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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lolol yeah only gave it 5 because a couple people actually fell for it xD
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rustyeffect
Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 1,629
Loc: East Coast
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: fapjack]
#12635426 - 05/27/10 01:02 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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It really was a horrible troll. You coulda tried harder man 
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Edited by œȾȿȝȴɧʢǥ (ȏɟ/ȿɮ/ɷɖ 68:82 PM)
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supernovasky
Comrade
Registered: 01/11/08
Posts: 8,982
Loc: Louisiana
Last seen: 3 hours, 42 minutes
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: rustyeffect]
#12635448 - 05/27/10 01:06 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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This thread.
 Enjoy though OP. Let us know how it goes.
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Maurer
Registered: 11/21/09
Posts: 5,203
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: fapjack]
#12635489 - 05/27/10 01:14 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said:
I can't believe I got anyone, that was a horrible troll. I was just joking around.
You always loved me?
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mrgibblet
Lemon Tek Pro
Registered: 09/14/09
Posts: 979
Last seen: 8 days, 19 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: fapjack]
#12635512 - 05/27/10 01:18 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said:
Prepare to be disappointed. What a virgin thinks sex is going to be, vs how sex actually is is a world about, well at least IMO. It feels good, but its extremely over rated. I'd suggest just hanging out with the girl, play a board game and just hang out. Wait until you are married, don't spoil yourself for some hussy that sticks her hind quarters out of her door looking for a quick romp. Wait for someone pure, if she doesn't stain the sheets red on your wedding night she isn't worth keeping.
What the fuck do you think im gonna do? Go straight over and fuck her immediately?
Of course were gonna hang out a bit first, were gonna make food and fuckin smoke weed and shit. But honestly I want to have sex now, I don't want to wait till marriage. Plus, this girl is the most amazing girl I've ever met, I know I want to fuck her brains out.
We are literally perfect for eachother. We have all the same interests, she loves that I skateboard fuckin hardcore, and she loves shrooms and psychedelics, so I don't see why I wouldn't wanna fuck this girl when shes so perfect.
EDIT:
Just read that you were trolling hahahah :P
I lol'd at your post anyways.
Thanks for all the advice guys, and yeah this thread is making me laugh my fucking ass off.
<3 Shroomery.
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"Anxiety doesn't exist. It's just your inner brain telling you that you're a pussy."
jokes
Edited by mrgibblet (05/27/10 01:23 AM)
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Maurer
Registered: 11/21/09
Posts: 5,203
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12635532 - 05/27/10 01:22 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
mrgibblet said:
Quote:
fapjack said:
Prepare to be disappointed. What a virgin thinks sex is going to be, vs how sex actually is is a world about, well at least IMO. It feels good, but its extremely over rated. I'd suggest just hanging out with the girl, play a board game and just hang out. Wait until you are married, don't spoil yourself for some hussy that sticks her hind quarters out of her door looking for a quick romp. Wait for someone pure, if she doesn't stain the sheets red on your wedding night she isn't worth keeping.
What the fuck do you think im gonna do? Go straight over and fuck her immediately?
Of course were gonna hang out a bit first, were gonna make food and fuckin smoke weed and shit. But honestly I want to have sex now, I don't want to wait till marriage. Plus, this girl is the most amazing girl I've ever met, I know I want to fuck her brains out.
We are literally perfect for eachother. We have all the same interests, she loves that I skateboard fuckin hardcore, and she loves shrooms and psychedelics, so I don't see why I wouldn't wanna fuck this girl when shes so perfect.
Have fun and I hope it works for the best. Honestly no one is perfect and people of the same interest don't work.
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mrgibblet
Lemon Tek Pro
Registered: 09/14/09
Posts: 979
Last seen: 8 days, 19 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: Maurer]
#12635542 - 05/27/10 01:24 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Maurer said:
Have fun and I hope it works for the best. Honestly no one is perfect and people of the same interest don't work.
I dunno man, if people with the same interests don't work, I don't know how I'll ever get married, because I will NEVER and i say NEVER marry someone who doesn't like to smoke pot and do drugs that I like to do :P
And thats for fucking sure, I will never let a bitch control what I put in my body... nor will I let the government.
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"Anxiety doesn't exist. It's just your inner brain telling you that you're a pussy."
jokes
Edited by mrgibblet (05/27/10 01:25 AM)
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Dystopia
unit - [s2dope] - v1.0.13
Registered: 03/24/00
Posts: 15,518
Loc: Danger Zone
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12635550 - 05/27/10 01:25 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Didn't read thread yet,
but if someone said "clean the pipes about an hour before" then spot-on ol' chap.
Fire a good one (or two, fuck you're 18) off so you don't bust in your pants when she texts you.
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teragon said:
shine off you fucking twat
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Meat_hod
sick shit
Registered: 09/28/05
Posts: 1,776
Last seen: 2 days, 3 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12635589 - 05/27/10 01:32 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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In my experience, People who have the exact same interests work best together..
The opposites attract rule has always failed me miserably..
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mrgibblet
Lemon Tek Pro
Registered: 09/14/09
Posts: 979
Last seen: 8 days, 19 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: Meat_hod]
#12635605 - 05/27/10 01:36 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Meat_hod said:
In my experience, People who have the exact same interests work best together..
The opposites attract rule has always failed me miserably..
Yeah same.
Opposites i just cant fucking talk to.
But this chick, I talked to her for 4 hours the other night, its fuckin fun to get on the webcam with her and shit haha, shes always in her bra and panties.
But yea, fucking her is gonna be great im 100% sure. And I will definitely tell you guys how it goes hahaha.
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"Anxiety doesn't exist. It's just your inner brain telling you that you're a pussy."
jokes
Edited by mrgibblet (05/27/10 01:37 AM)
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Maurer
Registered: 11/21/09
Posts: 5,203
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12635612 - 05/27/10 01:38 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
mrgibblet said:
Quote:
Meat_hod said:
In my experience, People who have the exact same interests work best together..
The opposites attract rule has always failed me miserably..
Yeah same.
Opposites i just cant fucking talk to.
But this chick, I talked to her for 4 hours the other night, its fuckin fun to get on the webcam with her and shit haha, shes always in her bra and panties.
But yea, fucking her is gonna be great im 100% sure. And I will definitely tell you guys how it goes hahaha.
Yeah marry some one just like you. In order to go out some one has to stay home, in order to love grilled food some one has to hate it or it's just another day. Get my point?
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fapjack
I had sex with your dad
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 10,808
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 20 minutes, 21 seconds
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12635715 - 05/27/10 02:02 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Post results. The feeling after the sex is the best part about your first sexual experience IMO. Nothing is better than casting your virginity into the pits of hell. Being a virgin is a major inconvenience.
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steadyheady
Ex Nihilo
Registered: 07/17/09
Posts: 355
Last seen: 1 year, 8 months
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: Dystopia]
#12635723 - 05/27/10 02:04 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Dystopia said:
Didn't read thread yet,
but if someone said "clean the pipes about an hour before" then spot-on ol' chap.
Fire a good one (or two, fuck you're 18) off so you don't bust in your pants when she texts you.
Best advice ever. Every male virgin should know this.
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Esse quam videri.
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scienceguy
Instrument
Registered: 11/27/09
Posts: 1,981
Loc: A Mile High...
Last seen: 16 days, 20 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: steadyheady]
#12636080 - 05/27/10 03:30 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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You should make her cum first before you even fuck her. Fingers, mouth, whatever. Just do it. She'll be ready and wet as hell, and you'll both have a lot more fun. Trust me. Any time you make them cum first, it's ALWAYS better. They cum like crazy, over and over, and you feel awesome.
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"Freedom starts between the ears."
Edward Abbey
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Brugman
antisobrietarian
Registered: 05/17/01
Posts: 15,887
Loc: the land up over 
Last seen: 2 months, 10 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: Chespirito]
#12636123 - 05/27/10 03:41 AM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Chespirito said:
7.5 inches is not huge, just above average.
Uh.. a bit above average.. too big!
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mrgibblet
Lemon Tek Pro
Registered: 09/14/09
Posts: 979
Last seen: 8 days, 19 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: scienceguy]
#12639265 - 05/27/10 04:52 PM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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Quote:
Brugman said:
Quote:
Chespirito said:
7.5 inches is not huge, just above average.
Uh.. a bit above average.. too big!
Good, I like to be big 
Quote:
scienceguy said:
You should make her cum first before you even fuck her. Fingers, mouth, whatever. Just do it. She'll be ready and wet as hell, and you'll both have a lot more fun. Trust me. Any time you make them cum first, it's ALWAYS better. They cum like crazy, over and over, and you feel awesome.
Good advice, I plan to finger the fuck out of her before we actually fuck.
I really want to hear this girl moan, and I wanna hear her cum.
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"Anxiety doesn't exist. It's just your inner brain telling you that you're a pussy."
jokes
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arainbow
Hippy
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 690
Loc: Palnet Earth
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12639376 - 05/27/10 05:12 PM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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advice
the night before jack off at least twice
(this is so you don't cum as soon as your dick touches her pussy)
in bed get her damn good and wet before you even think about entering her
work it in slowly (no more than 1 inch at a stroke)
make out with her after you cum till you can go again (the second time is for her)
then cuddle some more till SHE wants to get up (this prolongs her warm fuzzy after sex)
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There is more joy in heaven over one of us perfected,
than over ninety-nine naturally evolved angels.
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klondike_bar
Trekker
Registered: 04/23/09
Posts: 901
Last seen: 23 days, 9 hours
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Re: First time getting fucked [Re: mrgibblet]
#12639395 - 05/27/10 05:16 PM (3 years, 23 days ago) |
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some girls arnt big fans of letting you finger/lick them the first few times. giving/getting eaten out/blowjob'd can be a fairly slow and intimate thing, where as getting thrown down and having the virginity fucked out of you is definitely the way to go.
also, find the g-spot. its insanely sexy when she starts SOAKING the sheets while youre still going at it
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arainbow
Hippy
Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 690
Loc: Palnet Earth
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I almost forgot
find out what the clitoris is and rub close to it
but not ON it rubbing on it can be painful until she cums a few times it's kind of like dry rubbing your dick hard
or just rub her mound if she pushes down on your hand rub harder
be vary careful with her inner pussy lips they are as easy to hurt as your balls are
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There is more joy in heaven over one of us perfected,
than over ninety-nine naturally evolved angels.
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