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Twirling
Barred Spiral
Registered: 02/03/03
Posts: 2,468
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Swami]
#3038365 - 08/23/04 01:00 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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I disagree with the idea that anger is only appropriate at certain times. What makes it appropriate or not is how a person reacts to that anger. Anger is term used to describe an unsettling feeling or emotion, and that feeling is often unsettling so that person can know something is wrong so they can do something about it. Think about how the body reacts to pain. If we didn?t feel pain, we could put our hand in a fire, not feel a thing, and think nothing?s wrong.
The problem lies in that anger is feeling as the result of being in a helpless or threatening situation, and people react in that way instinctively without really questioning what the best thing to do is, or why that emotion exists in the first place. This is how anger can be a very positive and appropriate emotion, it allows for people to be aware that something is wrong and it needs attention. Emotions are not always rational things however, so people often react to those emotions in an irrational manner. The key is be aware enough of yourself and why you?re angry in the first place so it can be resolved appropriately and in a healthy manner.
(Of course, if someone is directly threatening a loved one, especially in a physical way, that can be an appropriate angry reaction. There isn?t always time for that kind of thought)
-------------------- The very nature of experience is ineffable; it transcends cognitive thought and intellectualized analysis. To be without experience is to be without an emotional knowledge of what the experience translates into. The desire for the understanding of what life is made of is the motivation that drives us all. Without it, in fear of the experiences what life can hold is among the greatest contradictions; to live in fear of death while not being alive.
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Swami
Eggshell Walker
Registered: 01/18/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Twirling]
#3038372 - 08/23/04 01:04 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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*THUNDERS* HOW DARE YOU DISAGREE WITH ME!
-------------------- The proof is in the pudding.
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Twirling
Barred Spiral
Registered: 02/03/03
Posts: 2,468
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Swami]
#3038399 - 08/23/04 01:21 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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lol! Does that fall under the appropriate or inappropriate catagorey?
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Swami
Eggshell Walker
Registered: 01/18/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Twirling]
#3038470 - 08/23/04 01:54 AM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Dunno, but I feel much better now - thank you.
-------------------- The proof is in the pudding.
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Mushmonkey
shiftlesslayabout
Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,867
Last seen: 5 months, 9 days
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Twirling]
#3041627 - 08/23/04 09:43 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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"What makes it appropriate or not is how a person reacts to that anger. "
yar!
It's not if you get angry or not..
it's whether you fly off the handle at the slightest provocation.. or sit on that anger and not let it take over your actions.
Why are you angry, what caused you to be angry, what caused whatever made you angry?
Not to say I'm a saint :P but if you understand why somebody is doing whatever it is that's making you angry, you can address THAT problem with whatever means would be best suited to resolving the problem without exhaborating it by getting angry.
It's rarely a good solution in most circumstances.. except when you're dealing with people that do not deserve your consideration. You'll know them when you meet them, they're the ones that never show any consideration themselves. And, of course, the solution is to get angry and either kick them out or leave yourself.
Although I will say anger and fighting can solve problems sometimes that nothing else will. Had a friend who always had been a bit arrogant and condecending, got drunk one night, angry, and flipped an expensive chair and broke a front door. He got punched several times, yelled at, told exactly what was what.. sat down for a half hour, and then passed out. Has been much more down-to-earth and all-around chill ever since.
Yanno, there really is no single solution.
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kaiowas
lest we baguette
Registered: 07/14/03
Posts: 5,501
Loc: oz
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Twirling]
#3041736 - 08/23/04 10:06 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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"The problem lies in that anger is feeling as the result of being in a helpless or threatening situation, and people react in that way instinctively without really questioning what the best thing to do is, or why that emotion exists in the first place. This is how anger can be a very positive and appropriate emotion, it allows for people to be aware that something is wrong and it needs attention. Emotions are not always rational things however, so people often react to those emotions in an irrational manner. The key is be aware enough of yourself and why you?re angry in the first place so it can be resolved appropriately and in a healthy manner."
that is one of the best ways I have seen it put! the path of self improvement
-------------------- Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.
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deff
just love everyone
Registered: 05/01/04
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: Swami]
#3041791 - 08/23/04 10:16 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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Anger is inert. It does not matter outside of the perception of it's holder. That is, unless you react irrationally due to anger, but that brings about the paradox of irrationality - for how can something not be rational if it is existant. Really though, anger is not bad, it is illusionary - it is a symbol of a mindset otherwise undescribable. All anger is the result of the internal, therefore no one is the cause of another's anger. Personally, I can't remember the last time I was *mad*. I dunno, it seems rather silly if you ask me.
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gettinjiggywithit
jiggy
Registered: 07/20/04
Posts: 7,469
Loc: Heart of Laughter
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Re: Getting Angry [Re: kaiowas]
#3041795 - 08/23/04 10:16 PM (19 years, 7 months ago) |
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to add to that, if you used it every time a bit of anger began to surface it would never get stuffed and build up to result in an explosive and sometimes violent outburst up the road. I do understand anger as being able to be a healthy and constructive emotion if used as a warning alarm system to show us when we are loosing our self control. How often do you see it used that way? Most people let it build over the big stuff by supressing it due to fears and then blow over the littlest thing on the tiniest and weakest around. This is not healthy. Address molehills as the arise and they will never become mountains to blow up to get through. There are people who are called passive aggressive. They may never get loud, or violent, but they can let bottled anger seep out in indirect ways like " I'm sorry I ran over your cat". Watch out for them too!
-------------------- Ahuwale ka nane huna.
Edited by gettinjiggywithit (08/23/04 10:20 PM)
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