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vandago
Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 20,928
Loc: .
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Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. 5
#21562147 - 04/18/15 02:32 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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It's been a long fucking week. I don't feel like doing a damn thing.
I just want to walk through the woods and find like....mushrooms....or deer sheddings....or scrap copper......not coolers full of dismembered body parts.
And I had to go sleep with a woman twice my age and 10 years older then my mom....I'm sure this is going to progress nicely. Of course on my way to her house I blew a tire in the van I just bought....and of course fixed it and kept going......she really seemed like she needed someone.
Then somehow I go to work yesterday and everything important is gone from my wallet.....luckily I had no money in it...but whoever saw it laying somewhere took all my cards out......fuckers gonna steal my free gas.
On a lighter note......I'd really like more friends so I wasn't wandering around the woods alone, driving to 58 year old womens houses for pussy, and consistently having things taken from me.....but that would entail going back in time and performing a lobotomy on myself and not being such a fucking dick.....All of this is still better the being psychotic on ketamine thinking I was the reincarnation of jesus, hitler, Khan, buddha, and I was really a cyborg with a synthetic heart that was only pumping blood to grow GMO organs that the aliens were going to harvest from me when I was doing really good.
Fuck star trek.
This week was just wild.....so it's all I am gonna finish that with.
Fuck star trek.
Edited by vandago (04/18/15 02:39 AM)
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memes
Blessed
Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago]
#21562174 - 04/18/15 03:01 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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old friend, you have some stories - that's for damn sure. some truly unique shit comin' out of your experience on this earth; chalk it up to life~
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r00tuuu123
Now I'm just really piseed
Registered: 04/20/12
Posts: 8,507
Loc: I'll be there in a minute
Last seen: 8 years, 23 days
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago]
#21562185 - 04/18/15 03:08 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
vandago said:
And I had to go sleep with a woman twice my age and 10 years older then my mom.
Had to? Sounds like Oedipus complex to me.
-------------------- Please report me to a Mod for hurting your punk ass hippie feelings And all time Champion thread killer.
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MichAnon.ael
Dark Stranger
Registered: 12/15/14
Posts: 892
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: r00tuuu123]
#21562229 - 04/18/15 03:58 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Who ever said there was anything wrong with walking in the woods alone!?!? we love you, op fuck star trek
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fapjack
Title
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 4 years, 14 days
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago] 1
#21562590 - 04/18/15 08:36 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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You ground scored a corpse?
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Achillita
Back to the basics
Registered: 05/26/14
Posts: 4,565
Last seen: 3 years, 2 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: fapjack] 3
#21562601 - 04/18/15 08:42 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
All of this is still better the being psychotic on ketamine thinking I was the reincarnation of jesus, hitler, Khan, buddha, and I was really a cyborg with a synthetic heart that was only pumping blood to grow GMO organs that the aliens were going to harvest from me when I was doing really good.
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fapjack
Title
Registered: 07/26/07
Posts: 16,574
Loc: Central New Jersey
Last seen: 4 years, 14 days
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: Achillita]
#21562622 - 04/18/15 08:52 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Good ol' drug induced psychosis.
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!
Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago]
#21562633 - 04/18/15 08:55 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
vandago said: Fuck star trek.
on that note, someone in a neighboring town just got a 20 do 4 sentence for shooting out windows with a BB gun
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makaveli8x8
Stranger
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 21,636
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago]
#21562682 - 04/18/15 09:14 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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so this lady, did you take pictures of this epic tail? Do you have a detailed Psychedelic Experience of it that we can read?
-------------------- We were sent to hell for eternity Øh® We play on earth to pass the time Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.
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Connoisseur
Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 4 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago]
#21562774 - 04/18/15 09:49 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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I smell
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Sun King
Registered: 02/15/14
Posts: 4,069
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago] 7
#21562898 - 04/18/15 10:30 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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But at least my grandma got laid.
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DidYouSetItToWumbo
Batman
Registered: 01/15/15
Posts: 150
Loc: On a mountain
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: Sun King] 3
#21562965 - 04/18/15 10:41 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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wait wait, you found dismembered body parts in the woods ?
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makaveli8x8
Stranger
Registered: 02/28/06
Posts: 21,636
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: DidYouSetItToWumbo] 8
#21563217 - 04/18/15 11:23 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
DidYouSetItToWumbo said: wait wait, you found dismembered body parts in the woods ?
he told his story in reverse, he had sex with a 58 year old, realized he made a horrible mistake, then he ended up in the forest with a dismembered body and a flat tire
-------------------- We were sent to hell for eternity Øh® We play on earth to pass the time Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.
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Big Worm
Perf
Registered: 04/20/09
Posts: 7,642
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: fapjack]
#21563294 - 04/18/15 11:39 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
fapjack said: You ground scored a corpse?
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r00tuuu123
Now I'm just really piseed
Registered: 04/20/12
Posts: 8,507
Loc: I'll be there in a minute
Last seen: 8 years, 23 days
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: makaveli8x8] 2
#21563653 - 04/18/15 12:52 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
makaveli8x8 said:
Quote:
DidYouSetItToWumbo said: wait wait, you found dismembered body parts in the woods ?
he told his story in reverse, he had sex with a 58 year old, realized he made a horrible mistake, then he ended up in the forest with a dismembered body and a flat tire
That makes it a bit more beleivable.
-------------------- Please report me to a Mod for hurting your punk ass hippie feelings And all time Champion thread killer.
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Bodhi of Ankou
*alternate opinion blocks path*
Registered: 06/02/09
Posts: 24,778
Loc: Soviet Canukistan
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: r00tuuu123]
#21563688 - 04/18/15 12:59 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Wait, so what did you do with the dismembered body?
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r00tuuu123
Now I'm just really piseed
Registered: 04/20/12
Posts: 8,507
Loc: I'll be there in a minute
Last seen: 8 years, 23 days
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: Bodhi of Ankou]
#21563725 - 04/18/15 01:09 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Bodhi of Ankou said: Wait, so what did you do with the dismembered body?
I put it in a cooler for OP to find fuck if Imma gonna put up with some 58 year old bitch cheatin on me. Oh shit i forgot I hid a cooler full of beer near there.
-------------------- Please report me to a Mod for hurting your punk ass hippie feelings And all time Champion thread killer.
Edited by r00tuuu123 (04/18/15 01:12 PM)
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Konyap
Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 4 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: r00tuuu123]
#21563799 - 04/18/15 01:28 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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that would be an awesome weekend for me my mom is like 67
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin
Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: Konyap]
#21563898 - 04/18/15 01:56 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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I feel like this is similar to asking your dad for a car, then when he says no asking for a bike.
Guy bones old lady, has no friends, needs to spice up thread... Lead with dismembered corpse
-------------------- A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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TopPmz
<No Title>
Registered: 01/13/13
Posts: 2,615
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 7 months
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Re: Found a body, slept with a 58 year old, got a flat tire, lost everything in my wallet. [Re: vandago] 1
#21563926 - 04/18/15 02:03 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Elaborate on the corpse, man! You can't leave us hanging on a cliff like this.
-------------------- "Freedom Isn't Free" is only half correct. True freedom doesn't exist in the society we exist in. What the saying really means is "The Illusion of Freedom Isn't Free"
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