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 Atheist
Stranger
 
Registered: 01/24/06
Posts: 13,693
Loc: USA
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 Alright, listen to this fucked up story.   3
#16704135 - 08/15/12 01:37 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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It was Wednesday night and I was running around grabbing the last few things I would need for Electric Forest. While I'm finishing packing, we (my friend and gf) were also smoking some killer Cali bud out of my bong. It was late, atleast 11:30 PM. So were smoking and i'm just grabbin last few items and theres a knock at my apartment door.
I'm confused thinking 'who did I invite???' so I look through the peephole and its this scraggly looking kid. I open the door and he LITERALLY takes a step into my place and says 'hey im your new neighbor, i live right next door'. I share walls with him. He continues "man i knew some stoners lived in this place i could smell the chronic from the hallways sometimes"... I'm thinking god dammit, this is exactly what I need..
I NEED TO ADD SOMETHING: one of my other friends met him a week before this story.. my friend was digging through my dumpster late at night looking for something and my neighbor was taking his trash out at the same time. My friend had a cut on his finger and joked to the neighbor that the garbage was making his cut sting. My neighbor replied 'here, let me help you dig through the trash. I already have Hepatitis C' LOL... (not at him having it, just his overall bluntness about it)
So back to my story, he is saying hes a tattoo artist and does work in his apartment. (free Hep C with every tattoo!  ) I tell him I knew I could hear the gun when I walked by his place sometimes. So the dude goes: "hey, wanna come over and smoke a bong with my wife right now? She just had her C-section bandages removed earlier today".. I was stunned and could barely reply 'no man, were literally leaving right now'
He goes: "Ok i understand, we had a baby like three weeks ago." I tell him congrats and that someone in my family had a baby around the same time.. He says, "oh thats nice, my baby only lived 26 minutes though.
AGAIN im thinking 'WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK, WHO THE FUCK SAYS THIS SHIT WITHIN TWO MINUTES OF KNOWING SOMEONE?'
I'm pretty sure my jaw was totally dropped when he said that, I think all I could say was "shit man sorry.."
He opens up his hand, holding out in his palm is a little white ivory box. About the size of a pack of cigarettes. He says "oh dude, i forgot I have him with me right now. Look." Honestly I dont remember what I said, but I was pretty much totally mindfucked. I remember thinking 'wow, im DEFINITELY not tripping at this festival. this guy just ruined my fucking weekend'. I hope he isnt a member on here
When he left, my friend and gf dropped to the floor while i was SSSSHHHHHHing them because they were about to explode with laughter and the guy would've heard it! Fucked up story, i'm glad i found a minute to share it on here.
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 Simplymarkkim
FRANK THE TANK! FRANK THE TANK!
Registered: 08/11/12
Posts: 227
Loc: United states
Last seen: 4 days, 18 hours
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 Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704156 - 08/15/12 01:40 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Hahahahahha!! Damn! Did he show you the baby? Lol
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"wei wei pon pon wei wei wei pon pon
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qman
Stranger
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Simplymarkkim] 2
#16704163 - 08/15/12 01:41 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Start looking for a new place to live.
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Atheist
Stranger
Registered: 01/24/06
Posts: 13,693
Loc: USA
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Simplymarkkim] 1
#16704164 - 08/15/12 01:42 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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my girlfriend was so freaked out by it, she was like "how come the juices weren't dripping out???'
i'm like dude it was the ashes..
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shivas.wisdom
בּ וואלה
Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 5,929
Loc: Turtle Island
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704166 - 08/15/12 01:42 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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My first thought, upon reading this story, was 'where do you live to have such neighbours??'
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starfire_xes
Living colors,,,,
Registered: 10/24/09
Posts: 12,678
Loc: Southwest US
Last seen: 13 hours, 10 minutes
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Simplymarkkim]
#16704168 - 08/15/12 01:42 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Next thing, you are going to tell us he need a cuck for his old lady.
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 IF THE NEIGHBORS COMPLAIN BECAUSE THE MUSIC'S TOO LOUD, TURN IT UP SO YOU CAN'T HEAR THEM BITCH
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Atheist
Stranger
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Posts: 13,693
Loc: USA
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: qman]
#16704170 - 08/15/12 01:42 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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i actually yelled at him the other day because he always knocks on my door like EVERY DAY and now he doesnt knock anymore
came over asking for bud which he ALWAYS does and finally i snapped im like bro i dont fucking sell gtfo of here
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JohnnieYen
That CNC Guy
Registered: 03/15/11
Posts: 1,086
Loc: B.C. Canada 
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Simplymarkkim]
#16704173 - 08/15/12 01:44 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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my kid died, lol!
weird man... and he's your neighbor?
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Check out my CNC art!
   
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JonnyBtreed
Playing with Fire
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Simplymarkkim]
#16704176 - 08/15/12 01:44 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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WTF!?
People are crazy man...
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thoughts
imagining.
Registered: 10/06/07
Posts: 15,147
Loc: here.
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist] 2
#16704180 - 08/15/12 01:44 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Haha you should totally one up him.
Get a pigs head and keep it in your fridge.
Give it a backstory, he was your best friend for years and just recently passed or something, then make your neighbor pet him and shit.
Sounds like he'd be all over that shit.
Or just stay the fuck away from him.
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thangin'.
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Darwin23
INFJ
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Loc: United States 
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704186 - 08/15/12 01:47 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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WHAT THE FUCK? That dude is one bizarre bizarre, dude.
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Camwritesgonzo
Entheogenic Agnostic
Registered: 06/09/12
Posts: 486
Loc: Minnesota, USA
Last seen: 9 days, 20 hours
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Darwin23] 1
#16704215 - 08/15/12 01:53 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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To quote Jim Morrison, people are strange!
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Open your mind and allow yourself to learn from the world around you. The retention of knowledge is one of strongest faculties we possess, so why not learn all that you can?
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Bawks
Sleepy z_z
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Camwritesgonzo] 2
#16704247 - 08/15/12 02:00 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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d'awwww.. your neighbor just wants to be your friend
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PLOWTO
Registered: 03/27/11
Posts: 435
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Camwritesgonzo] 1
#16704255 - 08/15/12 02:01 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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your neighbor is socially awkward. cool story though bro
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Sheekle
Extreme Drama Whore
Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 9,189
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: PLOWTO] 1
#16704361 - 08/15/12 02:18 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Quote:
PLOWTO said:
your neighbor is socially awkward. cool story though bro
 why would you say that? its an interesting story not something you hear everyday no need to put the OP down with a "cool story bro"
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Playful Hate
Transhuman Polyglot
Registered: 05/15/12
Posts: 1,040
Loc:
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: PLOWTO] 1
#16704403 - 08/15/12 02:26 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin
Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 2,664
Last seen: 19 hours, 26 minutes
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Playful Hate]
#16704495 - 08/15/12 02:44 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Like wtf kind of response does somebody expect from that? I wouldn't tell somebody that just cause I wouldn't wanna think about it again. After three weeks you might have at least some semblance of peace.
And I would agree hes just socially awkward. Maybe in the past hes made friends by buying weed off people. Especially considering he first asked you to smoke with him.
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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Morgenstern
Doin' Thangs
Registered: 06/07/09
Posts: 5,665
Loc: Somewhere, for sure
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704914 - 08/15/12 04:01 PM (9 months, 2 days ago) |
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Good read.
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"Make a post that offends me, and I'll chomp down on your mushrooms so fast."
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volcomstoner
Stranger
Registered: 07/20/09
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Loc:
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704976 - 08/15/12 05:51 PM (9 months, 1 day ago) |
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holy fucking shit, who the hell does that 
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mongo lloyd
High Plains Drifter
Registered: 10/16/09
Posts: 8,242
Loc: UK 
Last seen: 4 months, 21 days
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Re: Alright, listen to this fucked up story. [Re: Atheist]
#16704985 - 08/15/12 05:52 PM (9 months, 1 day ago) |
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Quote:
Atheist said:
my girlfriend was so freaked out by it, she was like "how come the juices weren't dripping out???'
i'm like dude it was the ashes..
I genuinely thought he would have been carrying around a lil aborted fetus
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