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Anonymous #1
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 Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered 
#16634609 - 08/02/12 05:51 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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This is something I don't get. My girlfriend does not like to be fingered. "It hurts," she says. My previous girlfriends at least seemed to really enjoy it though. And what really confuses me is that my penis is much, much bigger than any of my fingers, and I stick it in harder and deeper than any finger. In fact, she quite frequently tells me to "make [her] bleed" or "I don't want to be able to walk tomorrow"...which means that it either doesn't hurt that much to repeatedly bang hard objects into her, or she's got a bit of a masochist streak. So I don't get it - why doesn't she like to be fingered?
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 King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
 
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 4,165
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16634631 - 08/02/12 05:55 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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It hurts but not strong enough type of hurt where it feels orgasmic.
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The moment you refuse the human rights for just a few, what happens when that view includes you?-Chuck D.
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Crystal G
Ultimate Scumbag and Douchebag
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#16634636 - 08/02/12 05:55 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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Some girls don't like being fingered, quite frankly, because guys are usually terrible at it. I too, for the most part, hate getting fingered by guys. If their hands are dirty and they haven't washed their hands I get bacterial infections. Sometimes, guys will not spit or lube up their fingers, and stick their fingers in while they are dry, which really hurts. Other times, guys will push on the G spot and other areas way too hard and it will feel uncomfortable.
Also, for some stupid reason, guys always try to stick fingers INSIDE before even massaging the clit or bothering to get you wet via the clit first. This is the key to getting the inside to lubricate, is by stimulating the clit for a while first. THEN, once you've spat on your finger, you may be able to stick it in and go gently.
Bottom line is, if she doesn't like it, don't do it.
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Men who have a fear of women who exert control of their sexualities, know that they wouldn't be able to control or easily manipulate women who are aggressive, dominant, or defiant. Women who refuse to passively cooperate or adhere to stereotypical gender roles. So they use social stigma and social shame and call us "sluts" to try to implant fear and guilt in us, in an effort to control and coerce our behaviors. It is a completely selfish philosophy that stems from the belief that they OWN women.
Thus, me taking control of my sexuality is my big way of saying "FUCK YOU" to the institution, and another "FUCK YOU" to the patriarchy!  
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Crystal G]
#16634640 - 08/02/12 05:57 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Some girls don't like being fingered, quite frankly, because guys are usually terrible at it. I too, for the most part, hate getting fingered by guys. If their hands are dirty and they haven't washed their hands I get bacterial infections. Sometimes, guys will not spit or lube up their fingers, and stick their fingers in while they are dry, which really hurts. Other times, guys will push on the G spot and other areas way too hard and it will feel uncomfortable.
Also, for some stupid reason, guys always try to stick fingers INSIDE before even massaging the clit or bothering to get you wet via the clit first. This is the key to getting the inside to lubricate, is by stimulating the clit for a while first. THEN, once you've spat on your finger, you may be able to stick it in and go gently.
Bottom line is, if she doesn't like it, don't do it.
My friend told me a story of when he was a freshman he fingered this chick and pushed her g-spot in and left a finger mark. When he was a senior he fucked her again and the indent was still there. Don't know the truth to it, but it's funny.
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Your god is dead, and i killed him.
The moment you refuse the human rights for just a few, what happens when that view includes you?-Chuck D.
The X I got won't find you treasure, it'll leave you rollin so hard you leave in a stretcher-Chris Webby
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Content
Oohk oohk ah ah
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Crystal G]
#16634681 - 08/02/12 06:06 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Some girls don't like being fingered, quite frankly, because guys are usually terrible at it. I too, for the most part, hate getting fingered by guys. If their hands are dirty and they haven't washed their hands I get bacterial infections. Sometimes, guys will not spit or lube up their fingers, and stick their fingers in while they are dry, which really hurts. Other times, guys will push on the G spot and other areas way too hard and it will feel uncomfortable.
Also, for some stupid reason, guys always try to stick fingers INSIDE before even massaging the clit or bothering to get you wet via the clit first. This is the key to getting the inside to lubricate, is by stimulating the clit for a while first. THEN, once you've spat on your finger, you may be able to stick it in and go gently.
Bottom line is, if she doesn't like it, don't do it.
This.
Maybe you need to practice some finger giving skills.
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Improvements sha'll be made.
PESHawaiian ~ 4-HO-DMT
  
..every...time...
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 sadsappysucker
Booty Bandit
Registered: 04/06/04
Posts: 36,781
Loc: Florin
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16635104 - 08/02/12 07:21 PM (9 months, 17 days ago) |
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Crystal G is spot on.
She was probably too dry and/or you scratched her. Some guys I notice forget to trim their finger nails, and don't realize how much that can hurt during fingering. Make sure your nails are short, smooth, and clean. Nothing worse than feeling like you are getting fingered by Freddy Krueger.
Try to take your time and get her wet first via clit rubbing, wet fingers or licking her pussy first. And when you're rubbing her clit, try not to use your nails/tip of your finger, use the pad of your finger.
Think of what you like during blowjobs. Have you ever enjoyed a dry handjob/blowjob? Well, girls don't like it either when it comes to fingering/getting eaten out.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sadsappysucker]
#16635346 - 08/02/12 08:01 PM (9 months, 16 days ago) |
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Your fingers are boney. Your penis is not. Seems pretty straightforward why some people wouldn't enjoy the feeling of something bony vs. something that has blood flowing through it/all around it.
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psillymathhead
Untitled
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sadsappysucker]
#16635349 - 08/02/12 08:02 PM (9 months, 16 days ago) |
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keep your nails short and maybe even file them smooth... Makes a big difference. Also try rubbing outside the panty for a bit... this gets it going and will keep you from diving in. You should be able to tell when its ready from outside, then conquer that thing :p
Have fun kids!
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"I see it, but I don't believe it." ~ Geoge Cantor
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apassionplay
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16635353 - 08/02/12 08:03 PM (9 months, 16 days ago) |
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Maybe you're getting her with your nails? It can feel good but sometimes it does hurt if the guy doesn't really know what he's doing. Like someone else said, if she doesn't like it -- don't force it. But if she's willing to give it a go again, try to be more gentle and be aware of whether or not you're just stabbing her with your fingers or getting her with your nails.
Fingers and a penis are two completely different sensations. You can't really compare the two in this type of a situation.
Quote:
King Klick said:
My friend told me a story of when he was a freshman he fingered this chick and pushed her g-spot in and left a finger mark. When he was a senior he fucked her again and the indent was still there. Don't know the truth to it, but it's funny.
Yeaah, no. I'd bet a good amount of money that your friend is full of shit.
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 20,388
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Crystal G]
#16646790 - 08/05/12 01:28 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
Crystal G said:
Bottom line is, if she doesn't like it, don't do it.
That is, after asking her why she doesn't like it. Maybe OP is doing it wrong for this particular woman. As you know, you're all different 
Quote:
In fact, she quite frequently tells me to "make [her] bleed" or "I don't want to be able to walk tomorrow"...which means that it either doesn't hurt that much to repeatedly bang hard objects into her, or she's got a bit of a masochist streak.
Or maybe she just likes the dirty talk. Or maybe she likes the dirty talk AND be pounded hard.
Have you actually tried to talk to her about sex? It's fun, you know, if you keep an open mind and are respectful (and if she is too)!
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sun_spots
renegade starship
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: King Klick]
#16646812 - 08/05/12 01:32 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
King Klick said:
My friend told me a story of when he was a freshman he fingered this chick and pushed her g-spot in and left a finger mark. When he was a senior he fucked her again and the indent was still there. Don't know the truth to it, but it's funny.
Your friend obviously has no clue what vaginas are made of.
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ToiletDuk said:
If you have a cat, it would be a good idea to fart on it, as this will bring you much luck.
"This is an environment of welcoming, and you should get the hell out." ~Michael Scott
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 20,388
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sun_spots]
#16646837 - 08/05/12 01:39 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Clay. Vaginas are made of clay.
Oh crap, scratch that. Adam was made of clay. Vaginas are made of Adam-rib.
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sun_spots
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: koraks]
#16646885 - 08/05/12 01:49 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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ToiletDuk said:
If you have a cat, it would be a good idea to fart on it, as this will bring you much luck.
"This is an environment of welcoming, and you should get the hell out." ~Michael Scott
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shLong
Registered: 03/05/10
Posts: 10,300
Loc:
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sun_spots]
#16646928 - 08/05/12 01:57 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Im not sure if my GF is just shallow (not mentally shallow), but I can reach her cervix ( I think ) with my finger..and man! she loves when I rub on and around that.
Maybe start slowly, op. Rub gently around it, without penetrating, get her going a little and then slowly work your way in while teasing a bit. 
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lizzywonderland
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: shLong]
#16647349 - 08/05/12 03:32 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Wash your hands, cut your nails down as far as you can, get her wet enough first, THEN spit on your own finger and then try GENTLY. /// ask her why and when and how it hurts and how you can fix it. Honesty is best! 
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"I've been told that people in the army do more by 7:00am than I do in my entire day. But if I wake at 6:59am and turn to you to trace the outline of your lips with mine, I will have done enough and killed no one in the process."
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sun_spots
renegade starship
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: Anonymous #2]
#16647570 - 08/05/12 04:16 PM (9 months, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Your fingers are boney. Your penis is not. Seems pretty straightforward why some people wouldn't enjoy the feeling of something bony vs. something that has blood flowing through it/all around it.
Some people have thick, muscular or fleshy fingers. It's not always a terrible experience. Just gotta know where, how firmly, and how fast to touch.
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ToiletDuk said:
If you have a cat, it would be a good idea to fart on it, as this will bring you much luck.
"This is an environment of welcoming, and you should get the hell out." ~Michael Scott
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 20,388
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sun_spots]
#16653278 - 08/06/12 02:25 PM (9 months, 13 days ago) |
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And then, some girls just don't like to be fingered. I met a girl once who didn't like to be eaten out
And no, I wasn't into her, and consequentially, I didn't try to 'convert' her
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sadsappysucker
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: koraks]
#16653570 - 08/06/12 03:28 PM (9 months, 13 days ago) |
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I've even met a few guys that didn't like getting head. 
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d
Registered: 08/08/04
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Re: Girlfriend doesn't like being fingered [Re: sadsappysucker]
#16653826 - 08/06/12 04:16 PM (9 months, 13 days ago) |
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Quote:
sadsappysucker said:
I've even met a few guys that didn't like getting head.
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Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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sadsappysucker
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That was my reaction too.
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