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Anonymous #1
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 opinions pls? 
#16548430 - 07/18/12 10:19 AM (9 months, 30 days ago) |
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idk if this is some pox on my brain or not, so i am just gonna type it and ask what you think of me...
i am 23. never had a gf. hardly have even spoken to girls. i have bad social anxiety and close myself off to other people (remain neutral,) avoid confrontation, am thought of as 'nice'. i never go out of my way to try 'pick up' girls, i never make the first move. inhibited? or maybe just not very attracted.
i have never had a wet dream. i wasnt able to cum until i was 16 (which was troubling at the time).
i masturbate now 2-3 times a week. it is always lesbian, always some kind of domination, like slave, or mature, humiliation and so on.
i do not feel good about this at all and it seems to confirm my suspiscion that there is something wrong with me. whether i do this because there is something wrong with me or whether i do this as a way to explain the feeling that there is something wrong with me is anyones guess. i am not too sure of the difference myself.
i am shy, highly self reflexive, my mind is always working 100 miles an hour. often i feel like i dont know anything and confused. often i miss big chunks of what someone else is saying because my mind is wandering. often i have trouble responding or keeping the conversation alive. its like there is somethign i dont get. i feel like i dont connect enough with people, i feel like the spotlight is always on me. i am always worried what people think of me.
i am lonely. i dont have many friends. i have not had a close one since primary school.
i did once tell a girl that i didnt like girls. she immediately tried to sleep with me (lol). the first few times i struggled to get it up. eventually i was able to maintain an erection, i think once i even came. my paranoia when we had sex, was escalated and i would project evil plots onto her...
anyway i am just trying to give you a flavor of the kinds of problems i have to deal with. i am not sure if there is somthing i need to 'confront' (not gay have tried that route), or whether just thinking there is something wrong in the first place is a problem and i should just get on with life and my weird old self...?
thanks 
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 daz01
Learning
Registered: 09/30/10
Posts: 1,777
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 8 hours, 41 minutes
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what you are going through is very VERY common, especially on a forum like this. we could give you great advice on how to deal with your anxiety but, i would go see somebody, seek help.
but remember, anxiety problems are extremely common. i suffered from severe anxiety throughout all of my teenage life and my story is very similar to yours, the best advice i can give is FACE YOUR FEARS. one tiny step at a time. such as, saying hi and making eye contact with random strangers. making random conversation about anything with anyone. goinh to the shops on your own. small stuff like that.
it is a slow recovey process but there is hope!! 
Edited by daz01 (07/18/12 10:41 AM)
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AlphaFalfa
imagine
Registered: 06/16/08
Posts: 3,849
Loc: 3 Seconds Ago. 
Last seen: 2 months, 8 days
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Re: opinions pls? [Re: daz01]
#16548803 - 07/18/12 12:13 PM (9 months, 30 days ago) |
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You have confidence issues and you are realistic. You project this lack of confidence to your sexual experiences because of your realism and because of that its very difficult for you to fantasize about what 'normal' people fantasize. The reason being that if you don't think a fantasy will ever happen to you in real life you won't feel aroused about it at all...
In more complicated words, sexual desire in a realistic person will always be inhibited, to the degree that you find it realistic for that desire to be fulfilled. That is why you like things like domination which do not involve sexy women judging your physical and personal/emotional characteristics.
To make matters worse you live in a generally homophobic society. The west is much much better in regards to homosexuality than other parts of the world, but there is still a lot of negative attitudes towards in in the public sphere. So a lack of 'normal' desire gives you a huge sense of paranoia about sexual experiences, which then exacerbates your confidence with women/people in general. This leads to even more difficulty with sexual experiences.
My advice would be to get off your lazy ass and learn how to build an excellent physique...the rest will follow and will be much much easier. I know because I was the same as you. As soon as my confidence went up, my desire for more and more beautiful women increased.
Good luck
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if you ever feel lost, just remember, life is not a journey, it is entertainment, all 4 fun...
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Anonymous #1
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thanks guys  . i was genuinely concerned about posting this.
@alpha- i am actually quite good looking (by no means peak physical condition but still)... tho my confidence is no doubt through the floor boards.
Edited by Anonymous (07/18/12 08:18 PM)
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AlphaFalfa
imagine
Registered: 06/16/08
Posts: 3,849
Loc: 3 Seconds Ago.
Last seen: 2 months, 8 days
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
thanks guys . i was genuinely concerned about posting this.
@alpha- i am actually quite good looking (by no means peak physical condition but still)... tho my confidence is no doubt through the floor boards.
Good looks, don't equate sexy. Remember, eventually we all have to get naked in front of someone if we want to have sexy time. So the way you feel about your body is a huge impact on how you interact socially.
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if you ever feel lost, just remember, life is not a journey, it is entertainment, all 4 fun...
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Anonymous #1
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cheers. i think you are right 
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itchmynipple
;)
Registered: 05/28/12
Posts: 1,250
Last seen: 1 day, 7 hours
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Quote:
AlphaFalfa said:
Quote:
Anonymous said:
thanks guys . i was genuinely concerned about posting this.
@alpha- i am actually quite good looking (by no means peak physical condition but still)... tho my confidence is no doubt through the floor boards.
Good looks, don't equate sexy. Remember, eventually we all have to get naked in front of someone if we want to have sexy time. So the way you feel about your body is a huge impact on how you interact socially.
I agree, i also think you should cut out all processed and fast foods and stick to a healthy, more natural lifestyle for food choice. also, build that physique. and most of your protein should come from natural foods, like eggs/eggwhites/chicken/fish/other lean meats, its all about mass, and to get more mass before you cut, you need to workout right.
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