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 vadub
nuggets
 
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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 Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof)   3
#16050227 - 04/05/12 11:20 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I started responding to this other thread and I realized no one is going to read it (still probably will barely get read) unless I make a new topic.
Women are attracted to men that know what they want and love to do in life regardless of what anyone else thinks/sees/cares/etc. This can be a hobby, playing a sport, being really good at some online game (lame but true), reading, painting, working really hard at a profession of your choosing, making (hopefully good) music or continuing an education etc.
It doesn't have to be something totally extreme or dangerous or sexy or incredibly lucrative. Just something that an observer can say "damn that dude is enjoying life to the best of his abilities and is loves what he does." Girls get wet over passion, its a known fact. No woman wants to be wit some wishy-washy not quite sure hesitant second guessing unorganized thinking man-boy.
They might fuck you if you're good looking and charming but the second that passionate guy shows up in her life with a gameplan and goals and intense love of life you may as well dissapear. There are plenty of average looking guys that end of up with beautiful women because of their lust for life and enthusiasm, not some abercrombie model looking guy with a pessimistic stick shoved up his ass.
You need to show passion for something completely independent of anyone else. For example I love to go bird watching and when I meet a girl I make that clear. "Hey I like to go to the woods by myself sometimes with a friend and try to identify as many species as possible because it gives me a sense of accomplishment."
Trying to impress a girl so you can stick your dick inside her is very very obvious. This might work with dumb bitches and non-intellectuals or plain 'ole whore buckets but its not going to win you any worthwhile women you'd be proud to show off to family and friends. Its like yo that new Audi A5 is so clean, sounds great, is a sexy car. Wouldn't you rather be the personalization of the car instead of a material object adding value to yourself as a person?
Gain confidence for YOURSELF, don't give two shits about impressing anyone. Impress and continually improve YOURSELF and you actually will have girls to choose from. Coming from a guy who thankfully got lucky with genetics I have found far far far more female attention and desire when I'm feeling confident about myself. I've been less confident for years and years of my life and short dumpy guys with confidence stole the spotlight.
If you feel good about yourself physically, mentally and emotionally and project that into the world you will attract people. Insecurity, jealousy, bigotry, insensitivity, putting other people down to make yourself feel better will only make you look like more of a little child not worthy of the manly job of making a woman achieve the ultimate in human passion.
Suck it up, quit unsucessfully going after hot chicks and work out, eat better, read a book, watch porn to get the poison out etc. Pussy and confidence will come and you'll wonder why you've never always lived this way.
Just remember fuck other peoples opinions, yours is the only one that really matters.
As Aesop Rock famously penned, I'm going to do my best (not my favorite rapper or anything)
"Lifes not a bitch , life is a beautiful woman. You only think shes a bitch cause she wont let you get that pussy."
Fuck your friends who don't truly support you, fuck tv, fuck the status quo. Do what you love and live the fullest life you can and it will shine a hundred fold more than the most expensive clothes, dopest car and fattest wallet.
I know its hard, this is coming from a guy that has considered offing himself int he past because life took one too many dumps on me and it seemed it would never let up.
Hang in there people.
Be yourself to the fullest. If other people make fun of you or make it difficult to do so exclude them from your life. A bully will quickly run out of things to do when he can't boost his ego off the suffering of others.
Trust in yourself and confidence, self worth, happiness and fulfilling relationships will follow.
Edited by vadub (04/06/12 12:12 AM)
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keyohnah
the proverbial mind spread
Registered: 10/18/10
Posts: 1,441
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 Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050286 - 04/05/12 11:31 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Awesome post, solid advice.
I wish I had more substance to post but you covered it well.
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"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story."
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 ubimarble
Stranger than most!
Registered: 01/14/11
Posts: 170
Loc: 
Last seen: 27 days, 13 hours
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050301 - 04/05/12 11:34 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I want to give you 5 shrooms!
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I wouldn't trust a thing I say, most of it is made up anyway.
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Me_Roy
Stranger
Registered: 07/30/02
Posts: 2,112
Loc: Berlin
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: ubimarble]
#16050312 - 04/05/12 11:37 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
ubimarble said:
I want to give you 5 shrooms!
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A lotta cats a livin' in the neighborhood
Some are bandits,
Some are very, very good as I would tell it to ya'
- I-Roy
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Me_Roy]
#16050464 - 04/06/12 12:07 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Un-anon'd. I guess I want to be more accessible to help others (and the ego boost jk :p)
Don't get me wrong I don't always abide by this advice 100% or anything but I know well enough how it all works. If I abided 100% I probably wouldn't frequent this forum at all and maybe smoke a joint every 2 months.
In the past I had heeded my own advice after a bad breakup and for real and it got me places I thought I'd never be.
This was coming from a kid with incredible social anxiety, a poor body image, lack of self esteem and generally a pretty "fuck the world" type of mindset. We all have out ups and downs but you can really get back on the horse pretty damn fast. Things happen rapidly when you take action.
Ultimately its ALL about YOU before its ever about someone else.
I'm 26 by the way.
Edited by vadub (04/06/12 12:44 AM)
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fbi365
Captain of the Sinking Ship
Registered: 02/07/11
Posts: 1,914
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub] 1
#16050472 - 04/06/12 12:09 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
vadub said:
As Atmosphere famously penned, I'm going to do my best (not my favorite rapper or anything)
"Lifes not a bitch , life is a beautiful woman. You only think shes a bitch cause she wont let you get that pussy."
That's Aesop Rock, I think...
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the way out is through
Pwnasaurus said 'Most contradictory post of the year goes to you!'
 
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StateOfMind404
Drifter.
Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 2,553
Loc: Terra-firma
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: fbi365]
#16050485 - 04/06/12 12:13 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I have an intense passion for taking drugs, does that count?
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No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again. - Buddha
We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love... and then we return home. - Aboriginal Proverb.
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: fbi365]
#16050511 - 04/06/12 12:18 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Oops you're right, got it, love his music.
And for those of you in unfulfilled relationships that you know ultimately need to end..don't fear the future. Follow the advice of gaining personal self worth while you have the time and the pain to motivate you. I know its hard and easier to sit around getting drunk/high/comatose.
I know the feeling of loss when it comes to someone you've spent day after day night after night for years with the person you love. After all that time it comes down to not how much you love that person but how much you love yourself.
You need to love yourself just as much or more so than the one you are with at a minimum. This is from my own experience. No one should control and otherwise control your emotions. Those are yours to enjoy, not be led around and coerced with.
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orison319
Áiac xictli in tlaltícpac
Registered: 01/19/09
Posts: 3,545
Last seen: 5 hours, 41 minutes
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050519 - 04/06/12 12:20 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: StateOfMind404] 1
#16050531 - 04/06/12 12:23 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
StateOfMind404 said:
I have an intense passion for taking drugs, does that count?
Edit:
Perhaps but this is a tricky one.
Did you study anything at colllege or plan to pursue a masters?
Not that I'm judging you or give a shit, I can just give you some good pointers in using your love/interest/passion in psychs to attract potential partners who share your enthusiasm.
Edited by vadub (04/06/12 12:30 AM)
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StateOfMind404
Drifter.
Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 2,553
Loc: Terra-firma
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050554 - 04/06/12 12:29 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
vadub said:
Quote:
StateOfMind404 said:
I have an intense passion for taking drugs, does that count?
Well I made a deep connection with a female who saw dmt as something far more than a way to get high. Its about how you see them. Do you do them to make you a better person, to understand what consciousness is? If you do the latter than absolutely it counts.
What really will put you over the top is being into other interesting hobby's and interests and out of nowhere without glorifying drugs that they allow you to perceive reality in a a way you could have never ever before.
Its all in the way drugs are presented. Come off them to get "high" and it will forever cheapen the experience for whomever may consider partaking them with you.
Take them seriously but do not proselytize drugs as the one off cure for everything. I've made that mistake and was instantly labeled a druggy just in it for a buzz. But totally, right person, right mindset you can take it on a legitamate course. Growing your sources adds to the mystique and the dedication.
Right on. Definitely see this point of view. I've made the mistake of turning them into something much more than what they are, and i've definitely been labeled negatively for it. I've seen some girls who were interested say hey you bring them and i'm willing to try them before, who had never done anything.
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No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again. - Buddha
We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love... and then we return home. - Aboriginal Proverb.
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: StateOfMind404]
#16050586 - 04/06/12 12:37 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I've convinced more girls (and guys) to smoke dmt who have never even touched weed before (maybe once or twice). Its all in the way its presented, and after they experience it you can shut the fuck up as they experienced it. You don't need to talk, its a great feeling.
Anyways back to the topic at hand I was thinking, its hard to be yourself sometimes when your surroundings are not condusive to it. I don't have those issues really because I live in a constantly growing diverse cityscape. There are always people like you around along with many many more people on either sides of the spectrum.
I would suggest hanging at off-campus college houses with people your age, going to festivals, concerts, art shows etc. I'm by no means a hispter, i wouldn;t be caught dead wearing tight jeans ever but putting yourself out there is 50% at least. The rest just falls into place.
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Kinko
Stranger
Registered: 01/07/11
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050651 - 04/06/12 12:57 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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my problem with women seems to be after the initial meeting , at first they are extremly outgoing , always smiling and asking me all sorts of questions ... i put up a confident , knows what he wants type of attitude and i have to say it def boosts ur chances of getting tail .. to be confident all you have to do is not give a fuck and say whatever comes to mind ( respectfully).. today at work this chick told me i was extremely hot... i guess it helps when ur hella good lookin :P
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Kinko]
#16050805 - 04/06/12 01:36 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kinko said:
my problem with women seems to be after the initial meeting , at first they are extremly outgoing , always smiling and asking me all sorts of questions ... i put up a confident , knows what he wants type of attitude and i have to say it def boosts ur chances of getting tail .. to be confident all you have to do is not give a fuck and say whatever comes to mind ( respectfully).. today at work this chick told me i was extremely hot... i guess it helps when ur hella good lookin :P
You just have to not start out at some unsustainable level of "game" or confidence, whatever you want to call it.
When that super cute girl you want to take home to mom and dad talks to you or you initiate talk with her make sure you heed this advice.
Don't pretend to be what you think she wants you to be. Be as much as yourself as possible. If you are goofy, be goofy (don't overdue it), if you are funny crack a non misogynistic joke and get both of you to laugh.
Point is just don't try to be cool just to be cool. She might show interest, suck you off when you guys get drunk, fuck her a few times etc. Ultimately though you need to be the catch, not her. Make her feel like shes lucky to be hanging out with you and not vice versa.
I'm not about crushing a girls self esteem but take the reigns you know, your in control, talk/date/hangout on your own terms. That doesn't mean be an asshole to women but just take control of the situation and don't be scared,
You need to give off the vibe that the encounter with the woman you are currently seeing ultimately does not matter. This is because you have...
!****refer to above****!
Passions and hobbies of your own that will make you feel just as good as chilling with her.
Does this make any sense??? If its still hard to bear and you live in a small town there are billions upon billions of humans on this world, don't limit yourself to a could dozen. Branch out...fuck it I just hope some people get something from this and start being themselves and reaping the benefits.
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fbi365
Captain of the Sinking Ship
Registered: 02/07/11
Posts: 1,914
Loc: Nowhere
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Kinko]
#16050822 - 04/06/12 01:39 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Kinko said:
i guess it helps when ur hella good lookin :P
This 
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the way out is through
Pwnasaurus said 'Most contradictory post of the year goes to you!'
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: fbi365]
#16050894 - 04/06/12 01:57 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Yea it does I'm 6'3 200 blonde hair blue eyes.
Tell you what though it doesn't matter a goddamn thing without any sense of self worth.
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fbi365
Captain of the Sinking Ship
Registered: 02/07/11
Posts: 1,914
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Last seen: 1 day, 6 hours
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16050930 - 04/06/12 02:09 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Yeah, its a whole package thing.
But you know how I started to get girls?
I spent $7,000 on cosmetic dental work because my real ones were gapped and chipped.
And then   
Self worth out the ass. Call me shallow or whatever you want, but its true.
Its a chicken and an egg argument. I would have asked you two years ago, how could I have any self worth if girls won't even touch me? I "worked" on my self all the time. Did sports, went to graduate school, volunteered. Nobody gave a fuck. If you can get a girl, you can get more girls. But its jsut a tuff situation if you can't get that initial boost in confidence.
With that being said. Look good. I know that's something not everybody can change. But you can look your best.
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the way out is through
Pwnasaurus said 'Most contradictory post of the year goes to you!'
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: fbi365]
#16050953 - 04/06/12 02:18 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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having a big dick helps me
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StateOfMind404
Drifter.
Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 2,553
Loc: Terra-firma
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16050990 - 04/06/12 02:31 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Apparently it does nothing for your self confidence as you posted anonymously.
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No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again. - Buddha
We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love... and then we return home. - Aboriginal Proverb.
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pwnasaurus
Stranger
Registered: 07/16/08
Posts: 8,657
Loc: Canada 
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: StateOfMind404]
#16050992 - 04/06/12 02:31 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
StateOfMind404 said:
Apparently it does nothing for your self confidence as you posted anonymously.
Awesome call out.
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vadub
nuggets
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 560
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16050996 - 04/06/12 02:32 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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If you think having a larger than average dick (I'm one as well) is your ticket to freedom of unlimited pussy you are wrong sir.
Yea you can fuck a bunch of girls, especially if they are blabbermouths and want to share. Big deal.
And yea looking decent does help a lot.
The point of me making this thread is that good looks only get you so far.
It's the way you live your life that determines who you can potentially end up with.
Sure "hey I've got a giant dick", that will get you laid alright. Will that land you the love of your dreams and intellectual equal who may even learn to love (or already does) the same things you do???
Probably not, she will be in it for sex and that honestly is about it. Guess what? The tightest wettest pussy *does* in fact lose its luster and appeal after several years. That's just a fact.
If you want a real woman you need you to be the fullest person possible and be the dude you've always wanted to be.
When your potential significant other finally approaches you it will be like nothing else you've ever really expected.
Don't settle for a tight warm hole when the person that its attached to does not mesh with what you want to gain out of life.
Far too many people do this and honestly it makes me sad for the human race.
Yes sex and especially good sex is rediculous.
Take the time and effort and patience to find someone that loves you for who you are and perhaps you can reciprocate the favor and live a very fulfilling and happy life.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16051103 - 04/06/12 03:09 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I'm not saying its the ticket to unlimited pussy.
Sooner or later people like you have to start talking to girls yourself instead of getting pussy that trickles down from me.
Until then I will keep fucking your white girls and pillaging your livelyhoods slowly right in front of you til you realize what you are looking at.
I have a big ol' donkey dick.
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koraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 20,719
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16051111 - 04/06/12 03:10 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
I have a big ol' donkey dick.
All male asses do...
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rodfarva
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=====-----=-=-=-=-I
Registered: 07/31/07
Posts: 4,860
Last seen: 2 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: vadub]
#16051161 - 04/06/12 03:33 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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I got a great girl. I should start a thread about how good I plan on treating her. then people will be like:
Quote:
She's fucking someone else, bro
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MistyMystic
Birdbrain
Registered: 03/20/12
Posts: 469
Last seen: 6 months, 16 days
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: rodfarva]
#16052037 - 04/06/12 11:51 AM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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i dont bitch
i criticize
and yeah girls expect u not only to be happy and in love with your own life but also mostly an alpha male in all aspects of life such as dealing with other men, women, work, and skills...
so you aren't completely right.
aesop rock is pretty cool on a side note i was just listening to daylight the other day and I was like ok atleast he has one good song.
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PDU
travel kid vs.amerika
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Loc: beautiful BC
Last seen: 8 hours, 7 minutes
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: MistyMystic]
#16052199 - 04/06/12 12:40 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Some very good posts Vadub - You post with alot of thoughtfulness and vigor, which I appreciate.
I don't really need to employ this advice, as i am in a happy relationship. However, I feel like you called me out on how negative I am and how I put up barriers between myself and other people (possible friends?) and how unattractive being condescending, and pessimistic can be.
I full heartedly agree with the concept of this thread - thanks for posting.
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GO OUTSIDE.
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keyohnah
the proverbial mind spread
Registered: 10/18/10
Posts: 1,441
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Re: Had to get this off my chest: regarding members bitching about females (or lack thereof) [Re: koraks]
#16052263 - 04/06/12 01:00 PM (1 year, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
koraks said:
Quote:
Anonymous said:
I have a big ol' donkey dick.
All male asses do...
Ha! Oh, koraks. You never cease to amuse me.
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"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story."
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