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Anonymous #1
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 opiates make me feel ok. 
#15942047 - 03/13/12 03:09 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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When I'm off them dying is on my mind most of the time. It's not because of the drug. I guess more so due to the reasons that are alleviated by opiate use.
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Anonymous #2
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opiates make me feel weird then sick then guilty.
weed on the other hand...
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Anonymous #1
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I don't want to consult professionals because I don't want to go to rehab. Having to be 100% sober of all drugs, not just opiate, scares me because I just don't have other outlets for happiness. I'd rather feel happy some of the time than none of the time.
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Anonymous #3
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Drugs can't create happiness, any more than anything else external to ourselves, can make us happy.Happiness has to come from within us.I think you are thinking and dwelling, on past events too much.I would suggest taking up meditation, and learning to live life in the moment.There is no past or future, just this little moment, we live life in.Happiness evolves from living in this moment.Learn to clear your mind of these constant dark thoughts.Drugs can't do this but meditation can.
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Anonymous #4
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
I don't want to consult professionals because I don't want to go to rehab. Having to be 100% sober of all drugs, not just opiate, scares me because I just don't have other outlets for happiness. I'd rather feel happy some of the time than none of the time.
The fact that rehab scares you is probably the greatest sign that you need rehab.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Anonymous #4 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said:
I don't want to consult professionals because I don't want to go to rehab. Having to be 100% sober of all drugs, not just opiate, scares me because I just don't have other outlets for happiness. I'd rather feel happy some of the time than none of the time.
The fact that rehab scares you is probably the greatest sign that you need rehab.
I don't use every day or have a physical dependence on them, or any drug. However doing drugs and sometimes getting drunk are really the only times I feel close to ok or happy. You could say I'm in a rut or a funk but that'd be somewhat of an understatement because I've really been completely depressed for years, and have tried a lot of things to try and fix it. I feel worn down, and it's harder to help myself. I'm arguably a position where my problems are substantial enough for rehab, but when you go to rehab you are expected to be completely sober, even drinking/smoking weed.
I'm too young to go to a rehab and put forth the effort to complete the program and stick with it after, but when you go to rehab you are expected to remain completely sober. Alcohol for example I use rather infrequently, although alcoholism does run in my family on both sides, and weed I was heavily into for a long time, and still smoke sometimes but often it makes me EXTREMELY anxious and especially with weed, once it hits you it's next to impossible to cancel the effects, even with benzos which can help when someone is having a difficult trip with psychedelics.
I'd be expected to give all that up, because from their viewpoint alcohol/weed could easily trigger and lead to other drug use, which honestly is probably true. I can't be around people that are doing a given drug without wanting to do some myself. If I had to alienate myself from all my peers because I can't even be around anything without wanting to do it, I would be a complete shut in and loner probably, and recently for most of the past year really I've already been like that, going out occasionally though still.
Sometimes sitting by myself my mind will race and I'll be in a really negative head space and that's why sometimes I feel like I'm about lose my marbles and I'll go get high and the relief is intense. Kind of like when you've been outside and it's really cold for awhile and you finally get indoors to where it's warm. Being out in the cold and you just want to get back inside sucks, but the worse it is, the more intense the pleasure of the relief is.
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Anonymous #5
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Yeah but you can't have the solution to all of your problems be "take drugs," or you won't have any real coping strategies.
I think you've been using drugs so long that you forget what it was like to be sober, and you distort that image to make it seem like you were always as unhappy as when you didn't have drugs. As much as you don't want to believe it, a large part of your depression does stem from your drug abuse.
I know how it is man.. I'm an addict myself, but it helps if you don't deny the fact that the drugs are hurting your mental state.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Anonymous #3 said:
Drugs can't create happiness, any more than anything else external to ourselves, can make us happy.Happiness has to come from within us.I think you are thinking and dwelling, on past events too much.I would suggest taking up meditation, and learning to live life in the moment.There is no past or future, just this little moment, we live life in.Happiness evolves from living in this moment.Learn to clear your mind of these constant dark thoughts.Drugs can't do this but meditation can.
I know most people would agree that happiness you think you're feeling from drugs is fake, and I might even say I agree. What I'm saying though is I've been going through a hard time for more than a few years. Few in far between I'll have an experience that is happy without being fucked up. I've gone extended periods of time with no happiness and up to this point I felt like the drugs I've done may have saved my life. Weed used to be reliable and effective but after many years of smoking it eventually began making me feel worse, but occasionally I'll smoke and I'll feel good from it. That's why I still smoke times.
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Anonymous #6
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sounds like you need to go to rehab.
to learn how to love yourself, and life without using anything.
if you choose to continue using after that its your call.
but get ok with yourself first.
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Anonymous #7
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Whoever says that drugs don't make you happy hasn't used hard opiates in my opinion. Or even shrooms for that matter. Of course this is just a temporary feeling, but people take drugs to be happy or escape the ugly reality they live in. That's just a fact.
I'm not saying that drugs will solve your problems, although they sometimes can - at least to a certain extent. A level 4 (or 5) mushroom trip can really change your perspective.
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Anonymous #8
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Anonymous #7
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Quote:
Anonymous #8 said:
Well, am I right or not?
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