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 Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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 My fiance is a VERY special lady 
#15899408 - 03/04/12 04:26 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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My wife is a god send and im the luckiest man in the world hands down
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor 
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin 
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it.  -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
Edited by Almond Flour (03/10/12 06:05 PM)
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C20H25N3O
Calico Kahlia
Registered: 02/01/04
Posts: 1,358
Last seen: 1 day, 8 hours
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a lot of relationships fall apart in the first year or two after the first child is born. The dynamic changes, and both partners become less pleased. What that means is for you to decide. But sometimes that is worth knowing. I don't know if what you are doing is right or wrong, but her behavior sounds very poor on her part.
Best of luck.
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Calico Kahlia come tell me the news
Calamity's waiting for a way to get to her
Rosy red and electric blue
I bought you a paddle for your paper canoe
Say you'll come back when you can
Whenever your airplane happens to land
Maybe I'll be back here too
It all depends on what's with you
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Me_Roy
Stranger
Registered: 07/30/02
Posts: 2,112
Loc: Berlin
Last seen: 1 day, 12 hours
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: C20H25N3O]
#15899563 - 03/04/12 05:12 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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You can still do your part to offer your child stability -- that's all you could have offered had you decided to stay with your fiancé.
Have you tried any counseling? Might pay to give that a go before you give up.
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A lotta cats a livin' in the neighborhood
Some are bandits,
Some are very, very good as I would tell it to ya'
- I-Roy
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: C20H25N3O]
#15899569 - 03/04/12 05:13 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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She will still end up getting all of your money in child support. And if you don't make this transition civil you will likely dig yourself in a deeper hole.
For example, if you become unemployed for whatever reason or take a major pay cut. And she is unwilling to have the child-support re-evaluated by the courts, you will go to jail if you don't pay. Meanwhile she will be spending all of your money on herself and her future men and only a fraction will trickle down to your child. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it, Nothing...
I'm sorry but this is the reality of the society that we live in. Keep it civil, in reality after you leave her she will have even more control over your life than she does now.
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
She will still end up getting all of your money in child support. And if you don't make this transition civil you will likely dig yourself in a deeper hole.
For example, if you become unemployed for whatever reason or take a major pay cut. And she is unwilling to have the child-support re-evaluated by the courts, you will go to jail if you don't pay. Meanwhile she will be spending all of your money on herself and her future men and only a fraction will trickle down to your child. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it, Nothing...
I'm sorry but this is the reality of the society that we live in. Keep it civil, in reality after you leave her she will have even more control over your life than she does now.
Well.....then it seems like now is a good time to get out with no taxable income and 100% of my money coming from student loans 
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
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Anonymous #1
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Indeed!
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XUL
Optimist
Registered: 03/16/05
Posts: 7,858
Last seen: 7 hours, 7 minutes
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Good luck mang.
let us know how it goes for ya
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JacquesCousteau
Being.
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 7,823
Loc: Everywhere, Everytime.
Last seen: 1 month, 17 days
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Sup... really like your attitude about this, even though I'm sure it's tough to go through... I just wanted to say that stable homes are overrated; as long as he knows what love is (that's your job) he'll be okay. Just teach him to love and that it's okay to love and to be loved, and he'll be alright. I believe humans are inherently nomadic on an instinctual level so I don't think that a "stable home" is all it's cracked up to be... I believe it's more important that the child have stable support, ie, awareness of how to believe in himself like you've obviously got. I don't think that, as long as you are a part of his life, he can turn out wrong.
Best wishes.
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
She will still end up getting all of your money in child support. And if you don't make this transition civil you will likely dig yourself in a deeper hole.
For example, if you become unemployed for whatever reason or take a major pay cut. And she is unwilling to have the child-support re-evaluated by the courts, you will go to jail if you don't pay. Meanwhile she will be spending all of your money on herself and her future men and only a fraction will trickle down to your child. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it, Nothing...
I'm sorry but this is the reality of the society that we live in. Keep it civil, in reality after you leave her she will have even more control over your life than she does now.
And does anyone know what child support for an Unemplyed student would run for in CA?
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
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 shLong
Registered: 03/05/10
Posts: 10,558
Loc: 
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Try for full custody...or at least 50/50 with no support.
P.s. Wisconsin is the dairy capitol, lol
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: shLong]
#15903438 - 03/05/12 02:27 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
shLong said:
Try for full custody...or at least 50/50 with no support.
P.s. Wisconsin is the dairy capitol, lol
Funny thing....I dont even drink/like milk  I just like the slogan we have here in California, and think cows are kinda trippy. Like elephants ya know 
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
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shLong
Registered: 03/05/10
Posts: 10,558
Loc:
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 I live in Wisconsin and they're having the fucking nerve playing 'happy cows come from California' commercials. As if any self respecting Wisconsinite would ever buy "foreign" dairy.
all in good fun, pal.
I wish you the best with your lazy beast you're going in to battle with.
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: shLong]
#15904255 - 03/05/12 05:33 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
shLong said:
I live in Wisconsin and they're having the fucking nerve playing 'happy cows come from California' commercials. As if any self respecting Wisconsinite would ever buy "foreign" dairy.
all in good fun, pal.
I wish you the best with your lazy beast you're going in to battle with.
There will be no battle. Ill float downstream and back into a tent most likely  But I cant stand her mental poison.
I am curious to what child support will look like for a student. Hopefully I can stay in school, but we shall see
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
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Bipolarbear
Stranger with candy
Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 828
Last seen: 1 year, 19 days
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Sorry you got burned but don't say that "you have no idea what these chicks are capable of" meaning that just because you misjudged your spouse that everyone else will make your mistake or that every other woman is just waiting to lock a guy into a terrible life filled with misery and mindgames with a baby to boot used to milk him dry.
I say this because I have known cunty bitches like your fiance and I have known and do know beautiful women who want nothing more than to help and grow right alongside with you in a 100% positive fashion.
You should have seen this coming by the way. People (unless they're honest to god true sociopaths) don't just change overnight. They have felt that way for awhile and you just haven't seen the signs or haven't cared to pick up on them. She was probably cunty back before you had a kid together but she masked it with insincere sunshine that shoulda tripped your spidey sense the first time around.
At least now you know she is a cunt so do your best to get custody so you can leave her and move on with your life. Vet your potential partner better next time.
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Quote:
Bipolarbear said:
Sorry you got burned but don't say that "you have no idea what these chicks are capable of" meaning that just because you misjudged your spouse that everyone else will make your mistake or that every other woman is just waiting to lock a guy into a terrible life filled with misery and mindgames with a baby to boot used to milk him dry.
I say this because I have known cunty bitches like your fiance and I have known and do know beautiful women who want nothing more than to help and grow right alongside with you in a 100% positive fashion.
You should have seen this coming by the way. People (unless they're honest to god true sociopaths) don't just change overnight. They have felt that way for awhile and you just haven't seen the signs or haven't cared to pick up on them. She was probably cunty back before you had a kid together but she masked it with insincere sunshine that shoulda tripped your spidey sense the first time around.
At least now you know she is a cunt so do your best to get custody so you can leave her and move on with your life. Vet your potential partner better next time.
Well i broke the news to her. She cried a little......but deep down i know shes over it too. I told her she can have the little one. She claims she wont come after me for so much child support that I cant stay in school. Hope shes telling the truth because I really do wanna stay in school, but who knows. She also wants to make sure I visit him and have him in my life because she grew up without her father......so I guess thats a plus for me
And you are right, I did see this side to her long ago, I just didnt see her turning it against her own family! O well Next time I meet a girl with an Emotional AK47 she likes to fire at people.....Ill stay away 
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
Edited by Almond Flour (03/05/12 11:15 PM)
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Me_Roy
Stranger
Registered: 07/30/02
Posts: 2,112
Loc: Berlin
Last seen: 1 day, 12 hours
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It isn't going to be easy, but it sounds like it's for the best. Good luck.
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A lotta cats a livin' in the neighborhood
Some are bandits,
Some are very, very good as I would tell it to ya'
- I-Roy
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Bipolarbear
Stranger with candy
Registered: 05/23/10
Posts: 828
Last seen: 1 year, 19 days
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Quote:
Real CA Milk said:
Quote:
Bipolarbear said:
Sorry you got burned but don't say that "you have no idea what these chicks are capable of" meaning that just because you misjudged your spouse that everyone else will make your mistake or that every other woman is just waiting to lock a guy into a terrible life filled with misery and mindgames with a baby to boot used to milk him dry.
I say this because I have known cunty bitches like your fiance and I have known and do know beautiful women who want nothing more than to help and grow right alongside with you in a 100% positive fashion.
You should have seen this coming by the way. People (unless they're honest to god true sociopaths) don't just change overnight. They have felt that way for awhile and you just haven't seen the signs or haven't cared to pick up on them. She was probably cunty back before you had a kid together but she masked it with insincere sunshine that shoulda tripped your spidey sense the first time around.
At least now you know she is a cunt so do your best to get custody so you can leave her and move on with your life. Vet your potential partner better next time.
Well i broke the news to her. She cried a little......but deep down i know shes over it too. I told her she can have the little one. She claims she wont come after me for so much child support that I cant stay in school. Hope shes telling the truth because I really do wanna stay in school, but who knows. She also wants to make sure I visit him and have him in my life because she grew up without her father......so I guess thats a plus for me
And you are right, I did see this side to her long ago, I just didnt see her turning it against her own family! O well Next time I meet a girl with an Emotional AK47 she likes to fire at people.....Ill stay away
Sounds like it's going to work out alright then. Glad to hear it. Just hope that she doesn't try and change her attitude and try to stick it to ya.
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meams
Blessed
Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 17,788
Loc: In a Tree
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GL OP. As much as it would be nice for your son to grow up in a "stable" household. Even if you stayed, it'd still be a shitty broken home.
I commend you for actually having the balls to step away.
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keyohnah
the proverbial mind spread
Registered: 10/18/10
Posts: 1,441
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: meams]
#15910837 - 03/06/12 09:34 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Uhh.
Well, I think it's good to step away from her but leaving the kid seems like a shit thing to do. Do you plan on doing anything to help you'd child out or are you opting for the deadbeat dad route? I wish you nothing but happiness but you should rethink cutting yourself out of your child's life if that's your plan.
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"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story."
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Almond Flour
Registered: 12/26/08
Posts: 9,102
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Re: Leaving my fiance [Re: keyohnah]
#15914838 - 03/07/12 06:39 PM (1 year, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
keyohnah said:
Uhh.
Well, I think it's good to step away from her but leaving the kid seems like a shit thing to do. Do you plan on doing anything to help you'd child out or are you opting for the deadbeat dad route? I wish you nothing but happiness but you should rethink cutting yourself out of your child's life if that's your plan.
Well we fucked and made up  funny how things work out. I swear its as if our sex drives are natures way of making sure humans stay together no matter what
Aside from the sex though we talked it out
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In other words, thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box. -Random Doctor
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition -Timothy Leary
Everyone has their own unique brand of toxic psychosis -Alexander Shulgin
living forever would be a terrible curse if there were not also quality of life to match it. -Unknown
There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus -Hunter Thompson
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