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 cmcd5528
Stranger
Registered: 12/06/10
Posts: 32
Last seen: 8 days, 18 hours
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 First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death 
#15797334 - 02/12/12 02:24 PM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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It all started on Monday night, I had classes the next day, and I had recently harvested somewhere around 40 grams of multi-spore GT cubensis. My trip was all planned out, I would eat 35 grams dipped in honey, and head over to my friends house where he could watch me to make sure I didn't do anything foolish. (note all times are approximate)
9:30 - I gathered together 35 grams of WET cubensis and began to dip them in honey, and start to eat them, once completely done, we (my friend and I) headed over to his place.
9:50 - We arrived at his house and I got the giggles..nothing was even funny, but I had a stupid grin constantly plastered to my face. This state continued for roughly 15-20 minutes as we head for his room to watch a movie (Super Troopers)
10:05 - Before watching the movie, we make conversation. I can definately feel them starting to kick in and get stronger.. As he was talking, his window would slowly move on the wall, and the walls also began to "breathe" in and out.
10:10 - We put in the movie and the visuals increase. He has several blacklights in his room along with one poster that is already vibrantly lit. The poster became EXTREMELY bright and so did everything else in the room. Having no psychedelic experience, I was completely mesmorized. The movie began, and this incredible state of mind continued.
10:30 - I had been talking to a girl for the past week or so, I had feelings for her, but nothing too serious yet. I knew I should have shut my phone off, but I wanted to listen to music. I recieved a message that she wanted to stay single for a bit. The feeling can't really be described, but it shifted me into a different vibe, I responded to her by saying that she didn't do anything, and I understood.
11:00 - My friend shut off the movie, and headed for bed. I sent him some messages about what she said to me, and how it effected my trip. I cotinued to vent a bit about how I only really started to see her because it was almost expected of me.
11:30 - Without warning, I immediately went into a huge state of ego death... I didn't know anything. Time was this blur, and so was my whole life. I didn't get why I did anything, I kept asking myself questions such as why do I smoke? and, do I find pleasure in this? I felt no connection to anybody anymore, my parents didn't mean anything, neither did my classes or my academic life. I was literally laying on the bed, begging for this to end. I seriously thought I had perminately ruined my life.
11:35 - I sent several messages to my sleeping friend, who didn't respond. They were, "This sucks, my life is this blur right now, nothing means anything to me." and "All I know is I ate this fucking mushroom, when will this end" followed by a final "help dude..." After not waking up or responding, I crawled over to his bed practically begging for him to get up. I didn't talk very loud, but after not responding for a minute, I went back over to my bed, and layed down, and continued the previously stated for roughly 2 hours.
It would come and go in waves, one second I would be fine, and realise it was all mental. The next second I would return back to knowing nothing.
1:25 - I finally snapped out of it for good, and wrote the following into my phones notes, "I wanted to try these mushrooms, find spirituality, and my inner self, but a simple text plummeted me into a hell that it seems no one can understand and I hope they never have to. My thoughts are running crazy at the moment, I knew I would snap out of it eventually, but shit." I layed down, went to sleep, and didn't go to my classes the next day due to a headache.
Next time, I will take less, do it on a weekend, and try to meditate or take advantage of the ego loss if there is any. Thanks for reading
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HarryL
Squnä'am
 
Registered: 11/16/10
Posts: 5,906
Loc: Washington State
Last seen: 5 hours, 13 minutes
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 Re: First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death [Re: cmcd5528]
#15802170 - 02/13/12 11:40 AM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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Good read... Yes, seems like you should have dose less and had a better setting for your experience. Suppose without knowing, it probably sounded like a good idea at the time... At least you did not end up naked and running down the street!
And yes... Turn off the phone... Can not tell you how often that has caused problems!!
Set and setting... Next time
Sorry about the girl but there are more and better ones you will encounter
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Mushroom hunting: One bad mushroom can ruin your day! Know it or throw it.
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cmcd5528
Stranger
Registered: 12/06/10
Posts: 32
Last seen: 8 days, 18 hours
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Re: First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death [Re: HarryL]
#15802379 - 02/13/12 12:46 PM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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Thanks, and yea as bad as it sounds, I didn't really have that much feelings for her. I wouldn't have cared otherwise but all my emotions were obviously exaggerated so that didn't help any. Im glad to report that I had a better experience with the same friend last night, except he partook for his first time with me 
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 Aldebaran
Psilo-Scribe
Registered: 11/26/09
Posts: 334
Loc: Altered States of Europe
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 Re: First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death [Re: cmcd5528]
#15805109 - 02/13/12 09:54 PM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
I would eat 35 grams dipped in honey, and head over to my friends house
I read that bit and then couldn't get The Owl and the Pussycat out of my head. Did you take plenty of money wrapped up in a five pound note? Are you, in fact, an owl? Do you own, or have you ever owned, a beautiful pea green boat? Did you eat any slices of quince with a runcible spoon?
Quote:
I recieved a message that she wanted to stay single for a bit.
These pussycats can be so fickle. 
Quote:
"I wanted to try these mushrooms, find spirituality, and my inner self, but a simple text plummeted me into a hell that it seems no one can understand and I hope they never have to. My thoughts are running crazy at the moment
Welcome to shroomland. Please keep your hallucinations inside the vehicle at all times!
Thanks for the report! Enjoy your future trips! (Apologies for any confusion created by references to owls and pussycats)
Quote:
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.
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I wrote that, but I meant something else
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cmcd5528
Stranger
Registered: 12/06/10
Posts: 32
Last seen: 8 days, 18 hours
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Re: First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death [Re: Aldebaran]
#15815209 - 02/15/12 09:12 PM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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Fickle pussycats indeed  your post made my day
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Dosile Kouki
derp
Registered: 03/08/10
Posts: 14,963
Loc: Paradise
Last seen: 10 months, 27 days
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Re: First Trip, 35 grams wet GT, amusing visuals, followed by hellish ego death [Re: cmcd5528]
#15817507 - 02/16/12 09:30 AM (1 year, 4 months ago) |
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thats the thing with mushrooms dude, is that one little thing can go wrong and shit can spiral out of control. also, i see it happen time and time again where people eat a big dose for their first trip, and eat up eating way more then they can handle and have a bad experience. it's sad to see this because it ruins the drug for those people in the future.
and it's funny me saying this because, i did that exact same thing. i took a ridiculous dose for my first time, ended up in the hospital... the trigger for me was having to piss my pants in a pitch black room, where i was so deep into the halucination that eyes open and closed were the same. my eyes were useless and i had to crawl and feel my way around the walls of my room to the exit. sadly i didn't make it in time to the toilet and pissed my pants... and it just went down hill from there.
i still enjoyed the experience and had a great time. but it was a mistake. one positive i drew out of that situation though was that having had a bad trip and seeing how bad it can get, i learned what to look out for and how better to cope with trips in general from that point on.
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