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Anonymous #1
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 Okcupid saga advice! 
#14696226 - 06/30/11 12:02 PM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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So I messaged this lady on Okcupid, she had seen me on there & said she was already planning to contact me as well.
The conversation goes well, switch to texting, phone calls, basically we've just been talking for two days nonstop, as in texting every 10-20 minutes on average. Got many shared basic interests, she wants to be a country house wife, I need a country housewife & I have the badass oldschool farm for it, nice big old farmhouse, plenty of land. She wants it sooner than later too.
But, then she's super hesitant to meet up. Basically, she says that she's quite interested in me, just never into plans, even with her best friends (unless it's camping), doesn't like going out, doesn't like people in general. Talking on the phone at some point, she made a comment that 'I've never met a dude from online dating unless he just came over to my house'. But at this point, I had already taken the gentlemanly 'high road' (asked er out to lunch, ahaha), and so there seemed to be no turning back. I tried a little, suggested I would stop by as I was already making plans to do some tasks out by her neck of the woods, she said she'd 'think about it'. She's unhappy because her needy sounding mom just moved into her house, she was recently dumped by some dude she met on OKC (this past weekend) & had travelled far (1/2 way cross country) to visit him, and she got sick in the process, so she said she feels sick & tired at the moment, her car's busted. This other OKC dude dumped her because she 'wasn't positive enough' - seems plenty positive to me.
She has a good job (but doesn't want one, hence housewife), super hot but well within my 'league', we're both ex punk/metalheads & also ex-vegans out in the country, 50 miles apart, in a region where you'd reasonably expect to travel 300 miles plus in order to find another compatible single.
I don't really get the whole fucking virtual dating, it's weird.
A couple twists in the plot, late last night (morning), I told her that I felt we were on different sides of a looking glass from each other, & she says, 'WTF I feel like I'm losing my mind, having a hard time understanding people & questioning my own sanity'. So I tell her that she sounded rather sane to me (maybe a little too sane, haha, but I didn't say it,   ), & it's probably some new ways of seeing things that may be causing some anxiety, anxiety feeds itself, stay calm & look towards the best frame of mind you can see. She says perhaps, & good night.
& BTW, although I'm  about it, I am still pretty skilled in this Online dating shit. Met several cool women from it, just went camping for 4 days with one, I just haven't met one I really felt compatible with. They're usually on the same page as me though in terms of, 'lets meet up ASAP and not waste time to see what's up'.
Basically, if I stop trying to make it work to meet up, then it'll just fizzle out for me & she'd just be a potential buddy on the back burner. I have been in contact with one OKC chick that contacts me every few months 'ok, I'm ready to make plans now' but then she cancels last minute. I never was too interested in that one though, she's not so cool, I just think it's super funny. So I'm not a stranger to internet indecision either.
But this one seems pretty much right up each others alley.
Well, i'll probably hear from her soon, she starts talking to me after noon. My questions are this: WTF!? Or, is it worth it to continue & try to make plans?
Shed some light upon it for me !
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Anonymous #1
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Just got that first text, 'where did you go?' Haha, what?
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 automan
blasted chipmunk
Registered: 09/18/03
Posts: 6,718
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She sounds kinda crazy. But as long as her crazy meshes with your carzy, it might work. She also sounds agoraphobic.
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No, no, you're not thinking, you're just being logical. ~ Niels Bohr
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Anonymous #1
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 Re: Okcupid saga advice! [Re: automan]
#14696313 - 06/30/11 12:26 PM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah man, I definitely prefer some other shade of crazy to mix with mine  . Hit it on the head there... I guess when back to the land hermit punks collide it may take some sorting...
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automan
blasted chipmunk
Registered: 09/18/03
Posts: 6,718
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Apparently, I go for slightly crazy women, too. They definitely keep things interesting!
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No, no, you're not thinking, you're just being logical. ~ Niels Bohr
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Okcupid saga advice! [Re: automan]
#14696369 - 06/30/11 12:41 PM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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We must just be waiting for the one that blends perfectly  (unless ya already found yours)  
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automan
blasted chipmunk
Registered: 09/18/03
Posts: 6,718
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I found one. I'll report back on how well she blends, heh
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No, no, you're not thinking, you're just being logical. ~ Niels Bohr
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Okcupid saga advice! [Re: automan]
#14696825 - 06/30/11 02:52 PM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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Cool 
& anonymous to not tip off any of the fish in the large sea 
Edited by Anonymous (06/30/11 02:56 PM)
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 Humility
Working on it
Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 6,696
Last seen: 28 days, 17 hours
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Definitely sounds crazy man. PERSONALLY she sounds too crazy for me.
But hey man, tap dat ass.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Okcupid saga advice! [Re: Humility]
#14699747 - 07/01/11 01:49 AM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah, we made plans to meet at her house. At various times in the conversation she mentioned her few major interests, great sex being the first, and told me she hoped I was packin the heat, which I am, so it's good.
But actually, I'm not into casual sex, though if I like her a lot than I'm definitely not holding anything back.  (ahaha, I liked the other sex icon better, but then it was called "ass2mouth" or whatever & just not up for that)
& automan:
You sure were right about the agoraphobia, I thought she was just not so interested & super picky.... 
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John
ssdp.org
Registered: 08/08/03
Posts: 7,026
Loc: Vancouver, B.C.
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she's gonna be like 80 lbs heavier than her pics.
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There's a thin line between sanity and insanity... and I just snorted it.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Okcupid saga advice! [Re: John]
#14709058 - 07/03/11 01:43 AM (1 year, 10 months ago) |
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Well,
Ya'll were too right. I cancelled our plans due to her increasingly apparent & excessive craziness.
The social phobia is fine to me, I also don't particularly enjoy being surrounded by your basic jackasses, but the secondary mental/emotional/spiritual damage incurred as a result of the societal taboo was just too much...
Maybe we could be friends (she actually has none), but she doesn't seem to realize that she could change her attitude and thereby greatly increase her quality of life. I assume that she would be hostile to such a suggestion.
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Anonymous #2
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Sounds like a psychedelic intervention is in order to expand her horizons!
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Anonymous #1
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Often, there is a looot of foundational processing to be achieved before certain sacraments are laid upon the tables. The modern culture lacks the traditional substance of preparation which links us in a deep way to the reality of nature.
But in my opinion, ritual substances are only dignified by the most necessary of circumstance, and in okcupid gal's life, what is needed is a good friend, I have offered this.
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