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 MOTH
Warrior
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 17,233
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 When you just throw caution to the wind
#8586980 - 07/02/08 08:07 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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When communicating, I sometimes get into a habit where I tell people what I think they want to hear, rather then what I am truly thinking. It's people-pleasing, and I don't like it because it feels dishonest.
Lately I've been throwing caution to the wind, just saying whatever comes to mind. Half the time I'm not even sure if I'm communicating effectively, or if I'm saying something that's gonna piss someone off. But it feels good to just let it out without concern.
WHO THE FUCK CARES, ANYWAY?! 
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 Helpme1
mershums
Registered: 07/06/06
Posts: 533
Last seen: 22 days, 2 hours
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8586984 - 07/02/08 08:10 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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i whole heartedly agree
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absolutely positively delicious
http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Cat/0/Number/8494383/an/0/page/0
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fantasylndvictm
yup
 
Registered: 03/19/07
Posts: 2,003
Loc: usa
Last seen: 5 days, 19 hours
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: Helpme1]
#8587334 - 07/02/08 10:51 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I have a habit of tellin ppl what they want to hear also but lately I'm kinda breaking away from that thank god
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Come chat with us in the #lnc
"Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon th world;
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity." -W.B. Yeats
:I like growing, it makes me feel good being able to grow something from a tiny seed and basically have life, or death, at my control." -- Divinatory
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NewbieShroomie
Registered: 07/18/04
Posts: 8,184
Loc: D) None of the above.
Last seen: 1 hour, 30 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: fantasylndvictm]
#8587354 - 07/02/08 10:55 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I have to do that while I'm at work, but on my own time I speak from the heart. It's easy once you get the hang of it.
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"If you get too far in front of your troops, you start looking like the enemy."
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Drewwyann
Picker-Upper ofthe Pieces
Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3,248
Loc: Atlantis
Last seen: 4 hours, 39 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587362 - 07/02/08 10:57 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I have problems with telling people what they want to hear. Big problems. I'm trying to crack down on myself though.
Lies might make the situation more comfortable, but the truth will set you free. 
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If i didnt lose my mind, it would drive me crazy.
You think of me odd, for the strange things I do,
But don't think twice, I think the same things of you.
  
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Apollyphelion
Dungeon Master/Words are Drugs
Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 5,476
Loc: Festival of Deaths
Last seen: 8 hours, 5 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: Drewwyann]
#8587558 - 07/02/08 11:55 AM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I WANT people to tell me things I don't want to hear.
Which would mean I want to hear it.
So I guess you can't really say anything to
me to offend me.
On that note, belligerence, insincerity, annoying
comments, rudeness, and skewing my words at
a socially consistent level can get so provoking
I might just kick your ass with words or my
boot.
I also will jerk off in anger.;-)
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"I mispronounce everyting"
"Are you a Candykid? Sk8terboi? Goth, punk, freak, hippie? Jock, rapper, banger, prep, hardcore, straightedge? Tripper, spinner, biker, thug, emokid? Yeah? Whatever"
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RasJeph
Summer Spins
Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 187
Loc: Upstate NY
Last seen: 1 day, 7 hours
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587592 - 07/02/08 12:05 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I say things with no regret. I used to let people walk all over me.
For example, the army keeps calling me asking me to join (Sr. in high school)...about a year ago, I'd let them keep me on the line for HOURS...my heart would beat faster, I'd feel bad for hanging up. Now, they call and I just say "I don't believe in your fucking war" and slam down the phone.
That is just one example...I've gotten A LOT more ballsy within the past few years.
Good for you.
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Man, I don't remember my first day of school. Or the last. Or, really...any days in between. But fuck, I remember that burrito dude. It was the best one I ever had.
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vitadura
Dream Seeker
Registered: 03/11/07
Posts: 323
Loc: Here, Now
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587607 - 07/02/08 12:10 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I think I tend to be the opposite, brutally honest. I tell people things they may not need to hear. I am upfront, and I don't try to sell products I don't believe (this was especially hard working in a deli while eating a vegetarian diet).
I don't mind it though. Generally, I keep my mouth shut when I need to. Maybe I should just find a bit more class and elegance in my language.
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"You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here." -Max Ehrmann, Desiderata
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OneMoreRobot3021
punky jewster
Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 55,478
Loc: new york shitty
Last seen: 29 minutes, 49 seconds
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: vitadura]
#8587609 - 07/02/08 12:10 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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I appreciate brutal honesty a lot more than telling me what I want to hear.
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The Drug Policy Alliance  Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies
"The psychedelic experience - it has a tremendous force to revivify the spirit, particularly because it is not an ideology. It is not something someone 'figured out.' It is an EXPERIENCE. And this is important to bear in mind." - McKenna.
"We're not mad, we're just doing what we want. You rigid thinkers can't recognize the healthy sanity of that." - Harlan Ellison, "Crackpots"
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DonkeyShell
Strange
Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 192
Last seen: 26 days, 20 hours
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587659 - 07/02/08 12:29 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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What a stupid cliche!!!!!
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JacquesCousteau
Present
Registered: 06/10/03
Posts: 5,330
Loc: (a-team)
Last seen: 5 days, 22 hours
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587677 - 07/02/08 12:37 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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There is room for consideration in every moment.
Every time a thought arises, it should be considered whether or not expression of THAT thought is appropriate.
Black and white blanket solutions cannot be applied in advance, because you have to be here now experiencing THIS specific thought that is in question. Blanket solutions are a means to an end of avoiding responsibility of awareness.
There is a difference between speaking your mind because you think it's the right thing to do and speaking your mind because you're feeling bullheaded and inconsiderate to how it will affect those to whom you are speaking.
I'm not saying you have to walk on eggshells or avoid other people's hangups... what I am saying is that one should know the intention of their expression. And this can only be known through awareness IN the moment.
Holding back everything on your mind and saying everything on your mind are two polar opposites.
There is a middle ground.
You can simply observe your thoughts before they manifest in physicality and determine whether or not it is an appropriate time and place for the expression you are considering.
Maybe I'm just a scaredy cat, but I don't think blanket solutions are healthy. It's just a form of advanced conclusion so that one does not have to apply awareness in future moments.
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So what is your dilly? Are you flim flam or wiggle wog?
What's the pickle pouch?
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MyRedrum
Easily Amused
Registered: 03/20/07
Posts: 175
Loc: Portland
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587680 - 07/02/08 12:37 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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Quote:
MOTH said:
WHO THE FUCK CARES, ANYWAY?!
The people that mind.. don't matter.
The people that matter.. don't mind.
say whatever you want, whatever comes to mind. if people don't like it, it's their problem. 
single conversations can change a person's life. maybe what they don't want to hear is what they need to hear.
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Distort my perceptions to make my reality more powerful 
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mycelismymind
ALKALOIDOHOL
Registered: 09/11/06
Posts: 964
Last seen: 1 month, 21 days
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MyRedrum]
#8587685 - 07/02/08 12:39 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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i like to say what people hate to hear, so they can have a reason for hating me so i do the crys.
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truekimbo2
dis-associate
Registered: 12/08/02
Posts: 4,008
Loc: ny
Last seen: 8 hours, 16 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: mycelismymind]
#8587865 - 07/02/08 01:37 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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Quote:
There is a middle ground.
i like to try and find the place in between complete honesty and wholesome lies.
honestly i'd rather ere on the side of falsely telling people what they want to hear or i want them to hear, because people aren't going to understand me or know my thoughts anyways, so communication is more about the reaction it gets from people than content.
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Original creator of the autistic mind control conspiracy theory
should the shroomery accept opiate users?
I refute cosmic coincidence
drug OBEs are not real OBEs
my plan for revolution
I wanna see it painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted black
Yeah!
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Cervantes
Devil's Advocate
Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 9,104
Loc: Dark Side of the Windmill
Last seen: 13 hours, 3 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8587885 - 07/02/08 01:42 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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Quote:
MOTH said:
Lately I've been throwing caution to the wind, just saying whatever comes to mind. Half the time I'm not even sure if I'm communicating effectively, or if I'm saying something that's gonna piss someone off. But it feels good to just let it out without concern.
Being honest is one of life's toughest challenges.
Honesty is relative and what seems honest today may not seem honest tomorrow.
All you can do is practice and get better at it.
At first, people tend to respond to honesty in defensive ways... but over time people begin to appreciate your honesty.
It is VERY important that you communicate effectively. Honesty only counts when people can understand it.
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You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. -Inigo Montoya
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CptnGarden
Tabaquero
Registered: 05/13/04
Posts: 8,356
Loc: the microbial layer
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: Cervantes]
#8587904 - 07/02/08 01:52 PM (2 months, 5 days ago) |
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during work im generally a person who hides who he is and tells people what they want to hear for fear of losing my job.
otherwise im totally an open person and only say what i think or feel.
which has ruined my relationship with a lot of people for stating my opinion and meaning nothing bad or negative by it, but again i agree with exactly this -
Quote:
MyRedrum: The people that mind.. don't matter.
The people that matter.. don't mind.
and its true.
being yourself and not putting on a face just to coexist with people is the ultimate freedom of being. if people dont like you for it, they dont matter.
the people that enjoy you for who you are are the people who matter.
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The empty-handed painter from your streets
Is drawing crazy patterns on your sheets.
This sky, too, is folding over you
And it's all over now, Baby Blue.
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adrug
a child of theuniverse
Registered: 02/04/03
Posts: 13,818
Loc: into the mystic
Last seen: 27 minutes, 52 seconds
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8588987 - 07/02/08 07:43 PM (2 months, 4 days ago) |
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Be warned...most people don't like people who do this. But as long as you don't care about being popular then no biggie!
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Posters and prints:
http://www.zazzle.com/leannsj/
Shroomery Tshirt store:
http://www.printfection.com/shroomery
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eris
member#124
Registered: 11/17/98
Posts: 13,568
Loc: North East, USA
Last seen: 2 months, 2 days
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: MOTH]
#8588992 - 07/02/08 07:45 PM (2 months, 4 days ago) |
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Fuck em. if they can't handle the truth and deal with it, then they aren't worth your time. Living in a sugar coated world is for fakes.
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My mushroom hunting gallery
going hard since 1995
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 aiyobro
moochster
Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 1,520
Loc: new york new york
Last seen: 6 minutes, 10 seconds
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: eris]
#8589008 - 07/02/08 07:52 PM (2 months, 4 days ago) |
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weell jeez taking time aint that hard shit stretching things out a bit actually helps yourself in the long run
i may not be the most gleefull person but when i do its often gratifying just to see the other persons expression
i dont mess around much anymore i take everything seriously in a manner that if i botch something i wont be so quick to rake in my falsehoods
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Curiosity killed the cat nine times before it died
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ToTheSummit
peregrinus
Registered: 08/22/99
Posts: 6,649
Loc: Las Vegas
Last seen: 1 hour, 22 minutes
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Re: When you just throw caution to the wind [Re: JacquesCousteau]
#8589177 - 07/02/08 08:46 PM (2 months, 4 days ago) |
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Quote:
JacquesCousteau said:
There is room for consideration in every moment.
Every time a thought arises, it should be considered whether or not expression of THAT thought is appropriate.
Black and white blanket solutions cannot be applied in advance, because you have to be here now experiencing THIS specific thought that is in question. Blanket solutions are a means to an end of avoiding responsibility of awareness.
There is a difference between speaking your mind because you think it's the right thing to do and speaking your mind because you're feeling bullheaded and inconsiderate to how it will affect those to whom you are speaking.
I'm not saying you have to walk on eggshells or avoid other people's hangups... what I am saying is that one should know the intention of their expression. And this can only be known through awareness IN the moment.
Holding back everything on your mind and saying everything on your mind are two polar opposites.
There is a middle ground.
You can simply observe your thoughts before they manifest in physicality and determine whether or not it is an appropriate time and place for the expression you are considering.
Maybe I'm just a scaredy cat, but I don't think blanket solutions are healthy. It's just a form of advanced conclusion so that one does not have to apply awareness in future moments.
Well said. Maybe Mom was right when she told you "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."
I appreciate honesty as much as everyone else. But there is a difference between being honest and being a boor. Every social situation is different, and each one requires a different approach. Just openly expressing every thought doesn't make you noble or special or noteworthy...often it just makes you an ass. People shouldn't confuse having some tact with being dishonest. You don't need to lie, but sometimes the right thing to do is just bite your tongue.
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You invented the wheel....You push the motherfucker!!
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