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 Veter
Stranger
Registered: 02/10/05
Posts: 457
Last seen: 1 month, 5 days
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 Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: Jackattack]
#5261449 - 02/04/06 01:10 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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I have a friend who has come so close to suicide its scary. She is one of my closest friends and gets extremely depressed on occassion. She has actually written a suicide note and planned a time for her suicide, but was luckily stopped by some unplanned events.
I, however, have realized that I'm not helping. I find it extremely hard to not give advice and share stories. I feel like I may have made her a bit worried about telling me her thoughts about it anymore.
The advice in this thread is spot on. Be there to listen, and be a place for them to go to when they need help, don't pass judgment in anyway. Just offer support.
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Let the Demons have their place, if so, it's angels you'll create.
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DRTMaverick
Photographer and Stoner
Registered: 12/18/05
Posts: 4,028
Loc: Reno, NV, USA
Last seen: 42 minutes, 39 seconds
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: Veter]
#5261475 - 02/04/06 01:28 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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Or try to help them have one thing go right in their life. I know that would ease my urge to drink antifreeze at the moment, (which I am considering lately) if one damn thing would go right.
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Official '08 Pacific Northwest Shroomerite Gathering!
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Jackattack
Stranger
Registered: 01/16/06
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: DRTMaverick]
#5268986 - 02/06/06 10:51 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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Drinking Antifreeze would be a horrible painful way to die.
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BobDole
Stranger
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 40
Last seen: 26 days, 56 minutes
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 Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: Jackattack]
#5302077 - 02/15/06 03:53 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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This is just my personal opinion: Deleted by Seuss Yadadimean?
Quote:
This forum is intended for serious discussion only, and off-topic or abusive posts will not be tolerated. When offering advice, please make an effort to be as helpful and supportive as possible. Remember, you're talking to real people with real problems and you need to take them seriously.
For a first post, you are not off to a very good start... -Seuss
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shane
Stranger
Registered: 01/08/06
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: BobDole]
#5344639 - 02/27/06 09:42 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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theres a difference between saying your suicidal and actually being it. id say about a quarter of all the people who claim to be suicidal really are. but i dont mean anyone specific.
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Statements concerning my personal actions and habits, and life in general are not to be taken seriously
go to familyradio.com
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Brakkie
Myself
Registered: 09/26/05
Posts: 813
Loc: Rotterdam... The City of ...
Last seen: 2 years, 29 days
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: shane]
#5344709 - 02/27/06 10:01 AM (2 years, 10 months ago) |
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Do you mean people that are looking for the attention or do you aim at those who claim to be suicidal but eventually are unable to do it...?
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"This combines the good sides of every other drug with none of the bad. This is the ultimate luxury, the flawless wisdom-pleasure hit. More mellow and cozy than heroin, but you don't nod out. I feel more alive and wired and energetic than with speed, but not jangly. Its got the blast of cocaine, but it lasted ten times longer."
"Going to the grave without ever having a psychedelic experience is like going to the grave without ever having sex. That means you will die before even becoming an adolescent." -Terence Mckenna
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shane
Stranger
Registered: 01/08/06
Posts: 267
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: Brakkie]
#5798149 - 06/28/06 01:22 AM (2 years, 6 months ago) |
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well, i guess its a mix. sometimes when you feel really shitty and lonely, its easy to say you wanna kill yourself, when you may feel like it, but dont plan on it, because their first reaction is obviously going to be "dont do it". its nice to know that people care sometimes, and when you say stuff like that, theyre gonna let you know how much they care. although, theres a big difference between trying to get that reaction by exaggerating a lot, and kinda subconsiously making it sound worse. but i also think a lot of people feel suicidal, but just cant bring themselves to do it, or cant get a grasp on the fact that theyre gonna be dead after they do it. i get that sometimes. it fucks up your confidence when you feel too worthless to live, but it fucks with you more when you cant man up enough to do it. that just doesnt help. but then killing yourself isnt gonna make your confidence any higher, for obvious reasons : ) thats just my opinion though.
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Statements concerning my personal actions and habits, and life in general are not to be taken seriously
go to familyradio.com
Edited by shane (06/28/06 01:31 AM)
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MushroomCrazed
Mushroom Muncher
Registered: 07/27/06
Posts: 21
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: shane]
#5907175 - 07/27/06 10:25 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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I would have to agree suicide is pretty low, and mushrooms should only open your eyes to how valueable life really is. To the guy who said shroomers are suicidal please stop taking them so that you don't give shrooms a bad name when you kill yourself(not to say i want you to) Shrooms aren't like any other drug the make you see the god within. If you don't see that then your not doing the rite drug  sorry but thats the way it is
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tomk
King of OTD
Registered: 09/22/04
Posts: 1,555
Loc: PNW
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: MushroomCrazed]
#5915132 - 07/30/06 02:26 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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I think people who use mushrooms are a lot more likely to be suicidal. First of all, drug use in general appeals more to discontented people, who might be trying to escape from ordinary reality.
Second, the effects of psychedelics could very well increase suicidal ideation via the same mechanism they help people. It works like this. Psychedelics have the effect of breaking down your existing world view. Sometimes people have problems that are caused by a neurotic world view. For example, a person who is gay might have homophobia in their world view because of being raised catholic. In these sorts of cases, the opening up caused by psychedelics is very benefitial, because you escape the neurosis that is causing you harm. Mushrooms are particularly effective at targeting certain types of existential anxiety, around the area of fear of death. However, people dealing with existential anxiety do not commit very much suicide.
However, this same mechanism of boundry dissolving breaking down of world view can be harmful to someone who's anxietys and nuerosis are not at the existential level. For example, psychedelic mushrooms would be contradained in a case where a person is suffering from delusions that an old flame still loves them. What could happen is that the mushrooms dissolve the part of the worldview where to person feels their old flame still loves them, but not reach the deeper part of the worldview where a person feels they need their old flame to meet whatever unmet need they are repressing. In these sorts of cases, a person would go from having a worldview where they had a reason to live, to having a worldview where they have no reason to live, because of the exact same boundry dissolving properties that we value the mushrooms for.
Also, psychedelic mushrooms do not rebuild your world view for you. You can have an intense spiritual experience that completely shatters your preconcieved notions about the world, but no way to integrate that experience into a new, broader, more holistic and integral worldview. People who go through a spiritual experience like this might very well be at increased risk of suicide, because they no longer have anything to hold on to.
Also, many shroomery users are unintellegent about drugs, using any drugs they can get indiscriminately. These people are more likely to fall into patterns of abuse that could eventually lead to suicide. Many shroomery users are also at a stage in their life (young adulthood) that often causes such feelings as helplessness, powerlessness, etc. These negative feelings are often caused by poverty, indifference, etc. These negative feelings are just as likely to be amplified by psychedelic use as the positive energy we can feel from a psychedelic sunset or something.
If you think life is valuable, you should use all your logical powers to protect it. This means, among other things, not providing psychiatric advice you are not qualified to give. This also means not viewing your drug of choice through any sort of rose colored glasses. I think psychedelic mushrooms are great, and have a huge role to play in helping people self actualize, but I also think that caution is called for, precisely because life is so valuable.
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"I am eternally free"
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 Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 24,231
Loc: underbelly
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: tomk]
#5916405 - 07/30/06 08:50 PM (2 years, 5 months ago) |
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I think people who use mushrooms are a lot more likely to be suicidal
What do you base this on? Not just the shroomery I hope. I haven't seen this to be true in a lifetime among psychedelic users.
Otherwise I tend to agree with much of this post.
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What the thinker thinks, the prover proves. R.A.W.
I don't believe anything, but I have many suspicions. R.A.W.
“I contend we are both atheists, I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.” ~Stephen Roberts
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pod3
Stranger
Registered: 12/22/04
Posts: 362
Last seen: 2 years, 7 days
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- [Re: tomk]
#6125864 - 10/02/06 07:54 PM (2 years, 3 months ago) |
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Edited by pod3 (10/26/06 09:24 AM)
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shroom_me
Registered: 10/06/06
Posts: 482
Loc: Usa
Last seen: 2 days, 15 hours
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: pod3]
#6147154 - 10/08/06 05:36 PM (2 years, 3 months ago) |
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Hi Vulture I DEEPLY sympathize with you and what your going through I was so suicidal in the past that i spent in total 6 months in a Psych Ward. And many months in Recovery Housing. Is you Girlfriend a legal adult? if so she should be able to get Medicaid but she would have to move out of her fathers house( honestly that would probably be best anyways it sounds) Does she have anywhere else she could live? Even if she cannot get insured isn't it worth getting help anyways? When I was suicidal i was going to kill myself on my b-day(after all my hospitalization) and the only thing that stopped me was that i met my now girlfriend of 2 years, that saved me, and i quit some hard drugs i was taking (dxm,pills) TRUST ME VULTURE SHES SERIOUS GET HELP IMMEDIATELY!!
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LuSiD9
Registered: 09/06/06
Posts: 396
Loc: The Bowels of Canada
Last seen: 5 days, 5 minutes
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: tomk]
#6212832 - 10/26/06 12:59 AM (2 years, 2 months ago) |
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I don't even know where to start with this, it may be long or it may not, i'm not sure... anyway, I guess I'll start by saying that this thread is a really good idea, and I hope that you have saved at least a few lives TomK. Suicide has always haunted my life, in the last 2 years, I have had 3 friends commit suicide one of them was extremely close, another I had to cut off the rope, I have also cut a friend off a rope just in time to save their life, they are still suicidal and it scares the shit out of me. I am permanently FUCKED from this, I can't even describe in human vocabulary what this is like... fuck man my stomach is churning, my hands are shaking, I'm getting dizzy, and it's getting hard to breath, and am fighting tears as I type this.... I just lost the fight.........*contain yourself man!*..... fuck where was I, oh yeah.... those are just the physical effects, my mind is whirling in a way that is indescribable and I probably wont go to work tomorrow because of this (yes, it is that bad) as a matter of fact I almost left work today because 'stairway to heaven' was the first song that played on the radio when I got there today (here come the water works again) this is the song they played at one of my best friends funerals (most recent, not even half a year ago) and again by a live band at his wake..... fuck I'm lost again, sorry this really fucking hard for me to type with the flashbacks/shakiness.... okay... after this last last one all of my remaining friends decided to get matching graveyards with the names, Bay, Day etc... tattooed on our left shoulders (I know this sounds morbid but it helps for some reason) we have even left a few blank ones because we know Justin was not the last... some good did come of this though, all of us have become a lot closer, and make sure we know we are there for each other. These last 3 years have been one hell of a wake up call for us all, watching a close friends head explode from a self inflicted shotgun blast will do that, I'm glad I wasn't there for that one to say the least, we also realize that any mention of suicide, the more subtle the more I worry, should be taken extremely seriously, the scariest thing is knowing the most serious people probably wont even say anything (not always the case)........no idea where I was going with this again..... right... this was only the last 2 years, I don't really want to go any farther back than this right now.
As for the fuck ups who encourage people to do this (close to attempted murder in my books) or ridicule them or even crack jokes about this subject, especially in a thread like this, well... FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING SCUM FUCKS!!, if you were to say some of this shit in front of me you would probably end up with a broken jaw.
I imagine it would be hard to understand what it's like to be suicidal/severely depressed if you've never been there, so let me tell you, IT SUCKS, it's not like you want to be that way, it just happens.
sorry guys  .... I am going to finish this tomorrow or something, my mind is fucking reeling right now and I'm getting to emotional plus I can't seem to figure out what it is I'm trying to say exactly... until then. LuSiD.
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"Reasonable people adapt themselves to the world. Unreasonable people attempt to adapt the world to themselves. All progress, therefore, depends on unreasonable people."
- George Bernard Shaw
"I am chaos. I am the substance from which your artists and scientists build rhythms. I am the spirit with which your children and clowns laugh in happy anarchy. I am chaos. I am alive, and I tell you that you are free."
- Eris
Edited by LuSiD9 (10/26/06 01:08 AM)
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lysergicide
Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1,291
Loc: Philadelphia, PA
Last seen: 20 days, 14 hours
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: LuSiD9]
#6263354 - 11/08/06 08:48 PM (2 years, 2 months ago) |
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This is interesting.
I am very suicidal. I think about death all the time. A lot of the time, my deepest desire is just to be dead and rotting in the ground. For a person with such a positive and optimistic outlook on life, who always pushes to be stronger and more understanding, sometimes I just want to be dead.
And I don't want to be dead. Killing ones self, I think, is the biggest mistake anybody could ever commit. Life is filled with so much opportunity and beauty, but sometimes I just feel so smothered that my only way to vent is to think about dying.
Death should really only be reserved for when this is all said and done. When that is, is up to you.
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CaRnAgECaNdY
NOVA's groupie
Registered: 04/09/04
Posts: 11,444
Loc: Billy Howerdel's closet
Last seen: 1 day, 3 hours
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 Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: lysergicide]
#6263487 - 11/08/06 09:35 PM (2 years, 2 months ago) |
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I found this helpful. Not for me, I am not suicidal. Helpful to those who may be.
If you are thinking about suicide... read this first
If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.
I don’t know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, you’re reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.
I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I won’t argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.
Well, you’re still reading, and that’s very good. I’d like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that you’re at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So let’s hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.
Start by considering this statement:
“Suicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds
resources for coping with pain.”
That’s all it’s about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesn’t even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.
Don’t accept it if someone tells you, “that’s not enough to be suicidal about.” There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.
When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.
You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things:
(1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.
Now I want to tell you five things to think about.
1
You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2
Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, “I will wait 24 hours before I do anything.” Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn’t mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if it’s just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3
People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4
Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.
But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone what’s going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:
* Send an anonymous e-mail to =The Samaritans
* Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
* Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
* Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
* Call a psychotherapist
* Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen
But don’t give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5
Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.
Well, it’s been a few minutes and you’re still with me. I’m really glad.
Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So let’s give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.
Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose won’t be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. It’s time to start looking around for one of them.
Now: I’d like you to call someone.
And while you’re at it, you can still stay with me for a bit. Check out these sources of online help.
Additional things to read at this site:
*
How serious is our condition? ...“he only took 15 pills, he wasn’t really serious...” if others are making you feel like you’re just trying to get attention... read this.
*
Why is it so hard for us to recover from being suicidal? ...while most suicidal people recover and go on, others struggle with suicidal thoughts and feelings for months or even years. Suicide and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
*
Recovery from grief and loss. ...You would be in good company... many suicidal people have recently suffered a loss.
*
The stigmata of suicide that prevents suicidal people from recovering: we are not only fighting our own pain, but the pain that others inflict on us... and that we ourselves add to. Stigma is a huge complicating factor in suicidal feelings.
*
Resources about Depression ...if you are suicidal, you are most likely experiencing some form of depression. This is good news, because depression can be treated, helping you feel better.
Do you know someone who is suicidal... or would you like to be able to help, if the situation arises? Learn what to do, so that you can make the situation better, not worse.
*
Handling a call from a suicidal person ...a very helpful ten-point list that you can print out and keep near your phone or computer.
*
A Helpful guide to someone who may be suicidal ...a helpful guide, includes Suicide Warning Signs.
Other online sources of help:
*
The Samaritans - trained volunteers are available 24 hours a day to listen and provide emotional support. You can call a volunteer on the phone, or e-mail them. Confidential and non-judgmental. Short of writing to a psychotherapist, the best source of online help.
*
Depression support group online: Walkers in Darkness - Please note: this is a very big group, but amidst all the chatter (and occasional bickering), it is possible to find someone who will hear you and offer support.
*
Psych Central has a good listing of online resources for suicide and other mental health needs.
*
Still feel bad? These jokes might relieve the pressure for a minute or two.
*
Ignore the bashers and DO NOT
reply or respond to any negative comments.
*Please note that I have not read any of the posts in this thread. This is copied from another site.
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merge_oners
Very Experiancedmakes perfect!
Registered: 09/07/06
Posts: 76
Loc: in a very confused societ...
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: CaRnAgECaNdY]
#6299399 - 11/19/06 01:42 PM (2 years, 1 month ago) |
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well, i like the article but you cant really say shroomies are all suicidal........... because that is definatly untrue, but other than that suicide is a death caused by serious depresssion of a person wich leads to self execution, it is sad but in a way part of life, there is just some of us who dont think like each other we are all different wich makes it impossible to know what other and how others feel by just a guess of something that happened to you in your life, life is like a story of a person (you) it is being told 24/7 some people may want to end their story in a way meant to be for that person it is just their social role in life, but you may not understand that because you are not able to think like the other human with that gift. some people just happen to kill them selves because they lack love or have a broken heart that they feel has no cure, so they pull the trigger.
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Can you help me figure out why humanity is here? cause im on a mission to find out!
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merge_oners
Very Experiancedmakes perfect!
Registered: 09/07/06
Posts: 76
Loc: in a very confused societ...
Last seen: 2 years, 1 month
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: merge_oners]
#6299442 - 11/19/06 02:03 PM (2 years, 1 month ago) |
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btw those jokes on your link are hilarious as hell! jesus christ that funny got to church bloopers omfg!
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Can you help me figure out why humanity is here? cause im on a mission to find out!
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furniture
Stranger
Registered: 10/12/06
Posts: 20
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: tomk]
#6329568 - 12/03/06 04:23 AM (2 years, 1 month ago) |
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good info. about a month ago my x-girlfriend showed at my place and slit her wrist with a carpet knife. people that are suicidal tend to hint about what the may do. so my question is when you cant help the person anymore, what is the next step?
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furniture
Stranger
Registered: 10/12/06
Posts: 20
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: MushroomCrazed]
#6329569 - 12/03/06 04:28 AM (2 years, 1 month ago) |
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take a minute and put your self in his situation
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FreakQlibrium
Serpent of God
Registered: 06/06/02
Posts: 18,768
Loc: Home to the indwelling Ch...
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Re: How to respond to a suicidal person [Re: DRTMaverick]
#6329595 - 12/03/06 05:26 AM (2 years, 1 month ago) |
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Lay off the antifreeze man. I tried to kill myself when i was in my L8 20's, all you do is hurt the one's you left behind....Life is short enough as it is, make the most of it
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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"
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