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 King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
 
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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 So i jacked off about 5 hours ago 
#16613502 - 07/29/12 09:40 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Only to find dry crusty cum flakes on my dick. Just fucking great...On the bright side i did have a nice little lady come over and she's as weird as me. 
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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 I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick]
#16613530 - 07/29/12 09:44 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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A week or so ago, me and the lady got to bonin'. I pulled out and shot clear up to her neck. She was looking down as she was trying to clean it up and thought nothing of it. The next day we woke up and she had dried jizz all over her chin. I lold
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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 jesus fucking christ man.
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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fiddle
Registered: 04/10/08
Posts: 1,769
Loc: PNW
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Do you talk to your mother with that mouth?
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Tickle my bassline.
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Gilgamesh18
Herbivore Man
Registered: 03/01/12
Posts: 11,671
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: fiddle]
#16613562 - 07/29/12 09:47 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Shit man I jacked off a few hours ago to
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: fiddle]
#16613568 - 07/29/12 09:47 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
maddlevi said:
Do you talk to your mother with that mouth?
Haha actually i do. I say fuck shit bitch (insert all racial slurs here) in front of her and she never cared. She swears like a sailor to.
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: Gilgamesh18]
#16613574 - 07/29/12 09:48 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
Gilgamesh18 said:
Shit man I jacked off a few hours ago to
It's almost like we were jacking off together, but no, i was not thinking of you.
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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novalentinehere
ron jeremy's BIGGER brother
Registered: 06/21/12
Posts: 468
Last seen: 10 years, 10 months
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick]
#16613579 - 07/29/12 09:49 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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would you mind walking me through the experience?
first person, please.
i haven't jerked off today.
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Eminence
Registered: 07/25/10
Posts: 16,627
Loc: Richmond, VA 
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick]
#16613588 - 07/29/12 09:50 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
King Klick said:
Only to find dry crusty cum flakes on my dick. Just fucking great...On the bright side i did have a nice little lady come over and she's as weird as me.
That's gross man, you should shower after you splerge on yourself. Especially on your dick that probably smelled like shit to her.
lol
Or is that the point you're trying to make about her being weird?
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Gilgamesh18
Herbivore Man
Registered: 03/01/12
Posts: 11,671
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Sure man I started the day like I usually do coffee and amphetamines. Then I struck upon the idea of some internet porn naturally my stamina was greatly increased and I can honestly say I regret nothing.
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fiddle
Registered: 04/10/08
Posts: 1,769
Loc: PNW
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick] 1
#16613607 - 07/29/12 09:53 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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I called my mom a wetback. I don't think she understood. Oh well.
Keep up the good work.
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Tickle my bassline.
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novalentinehere
ron jeremy's BIGGER brother
Registered: 06/21/12
Posts: 468
Last seen: 10 years, 10 months
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: Gilgamesh18]
#16613609 - 07/29/12 09:53 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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i need to know about your hand, the motions, the feelings, how.... everything.... looked. before and after you came... please
its the details that count, man
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE
Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Quote:
novalentinehere said:
i need to know about your hand, the motions, the feelings, how.... everything.... looked. before and after you came... please
its the details that count, man
 hahaha ur fuckin hilarious dude
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"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees
R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: Eminence]
#16613621 - 07/29/12 09:55 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
frylock91 said:
Quote:
King Klick said:
Only to find dry crusty cum flakes on my dick. Just fucking great...On the bright side i did have a nice little lady come over and she's as weird as me.
That's gross man, you should shower after you splerge on yourself. Especially on your dick that probably smelled like shit to her.
lol
Or is that the point you're trying to make about her being weird?
I didn't fuck her. I feel love struck tho. She was everything i want in a girl. But i was showering while jacking off...i washed my dick off quickly and hopped out to clean my hand so i wouldn't try to shampoo with it.
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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I_was_the_walrus
eggshells
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 11,887
Loc: next door
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Imagine a shake weight commercial. It was something like that
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babydoll
trippy bitch
Registered: 03/20/10
Posts: 1,740
Loc: pennsylvania
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick]
#16613623 - 07/29/12 09:55 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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death makes angels of us all and gives us wings where we had shoulders, smooth as raven's claws
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Gilgamesh18
Herbivore Man
Registered: 03/01/12
Posts: 11,671
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Quote:
novalentinehere said:
i need to know about your hand, the motions, the feelings, how.... everything.... looked. before and after you came... please
its the details that count, man
Hand had some calluses on it from lifting weights regularly, my motions were swift yet precise. Emotions were raw animistic if you will and my god the the blonde that was getting railed facial expression set me off and then it was all over.
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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Quote:
novalentinehere said:
i need to know about your hand, the motions, the feelings, how.... everything.... looked. before and after you came... please
its the details that count, man
Well i usually go about it by smoking a cigarette, slowly i drag, then i take my hand and just yank my dick like i'm pulling on a rope. It finally gets hard because it knows that if it doesn't, i'll kill it. Then i go sensually stroking it, until i get bored and just wanna finish. Then i start yanking it like a rope again until i cum all over the floor. Somewhere along the lines i saw a clown staring at me. And i got creeped out but he came when i came.
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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novalentinehere
ron jeremy's BIGGER brother
Registered: 06/21/12
Posts: 468
Last seen: 10 years, 10 months
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Re: So i jacked off about 5 hours ago [Re: King Klick]
#16613656 - 07/29/12 10:01 PM (11 years, 8 months ago) |
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does it throb?
can you see the veins pulsating?
does your head swell?
tell me all about it. i'm almost there
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows
Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 9 months, 15 days
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Quote:
novalentinehere said:
does it throb?
can you see the veins pulsating?
does your head swell?
tell me all about it. i'm almost there
Lmao who said i had a penis?
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Your god is dead, and I killed him.
When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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