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Anonymous #1
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 sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? 
#16103876 - 04/17/12 10:43 PM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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To a degree atleast for being asexual. i have more attraction to guys these days, but i dont like the idea of kissing them, nor sticking something in my ass. i used to love girls, but im 19 now. and also i hate my mother because of what she's done to my family, and the girl i consider my first young love twisted my heart up. after her i wasnt the same about girls.
it isnt to say i cant get attracted to girls, it just takes more. but it goes back and forth. sometimes i can get horny from watching gay sex, but then other times i dont at all. and same with females. ive noticed that my attraction to both are sort of decreasing.
Edited by Anonymous (04/17/12 10:44 PM)
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 All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber
Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 7,726
Loc: colorado
Last seen: 2 days, 5 hours
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16104475 - 04/18/12 01:00 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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I am in a similar boat to you. I don't enjoy kissing nor hooking up with guys; however, I am attracted to guys at least to some limited extent and watch gay porn from time to time. I hooked up with a guy over new years to try it out and it was kinda meh. Honestly, I think it's the somewhat taboo aspect of it that gets me. I thought I was gay for a while then I was also asexual for a while. I think this largely stems from how fucking NUTS my mom is; it really turned me off of women in general. Over time, from meeting many amazing chicks, I'm basically over this. Sometimes I'm more into chicks; other times, I feel like I'm more into guys. While there is a large number of people on the Shroomery (and in life) obsessed with sexually categorizing you, fuck them. Just do what the fuck you want. If you don't want to fuck/kiss guys, don't. If you want to fuck girls, do. If you don't want to fuck anyone, don't. Just follow your inclinations. Do what the fuck you want and fuck the haters. If you have more specific comments, please voice them. I can probably add at least some advice being in a similar position to you. I'm 25 btw. 
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
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Anonymous #1
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: All We Perceive]
#16104537 - 04/18/12 01:18 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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yeah, see i would like to hook up with a guy you know to try it out, and to see where i stand post gay-interaction, but its sort of a like, how the fuck do i manage that in my all straight life, and all straight friends which most of them wouldn't accept it. there is one kid I used to chill with when i would chill with a mutual friend, were mad tight too though and apparently he has been secretly to some people fucking around with this guy and is actually completely gay, but hasn't told his best friend, the mutual friend, so if i reached out to him, it would signal that his best friend who he's been keeping from knows also (since thats how i found out), and everyone else. ya know? that might of been a little confusing.
but yeah, im not in the right boat as far as gay accepting friends/family. possibly bi sexual, maybe i can slowly do that to some. my old friend like the one i mentioned knowing his friend is secretly gay would understand more, but we've for the most part grown apartish and hang out once in awhile although we grew up together. but ive told just 1 of my friends who is the most understand-type of friend i have and also i only told him because he never really goes out of his way or tries to hook up with girls unless were at a party, so i thought he might be gay or bi, he just doesnt talk to girls at all, and my ex-girlfriend who've I've been with for a year and half and just broke up with a few weeks ago. she was actually happyish about it lol, i told her thats the reason why i broke up with her, which partially is why, how can i date someone if im not sure if im black, white, or grey right?
it feels like my desires and my sexuality path has been put on standby
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All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber
Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 7,726
Loc: colorado
Last seen: 2 days, 5 hours
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16104591 - 04/18/12 01:38 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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This may be difficult to take in, but I encourage you to tell your friends what is going on. My friends make gay jokes all the time in fun and a buddy of mine came out as being gay and they didn't blink an eye. Nor did they blink when I told them that I was attracted to guys as well but was kind of confused about which territory I stood in. I then moved and told a shitload of people at my school when I was drunk at a social. None of them cared. My mom would probably care for a while if I told her but eh, whatever. Neither of my parents know anything about my sexuality what-so-ever and I prefer it that way. After I told my dad that I snagged my ex, he told me that "he was terrible with girls, so never come to him with any issues" I pretty much realized that all I have are my friends for anything serious. Perhaps your parents situation is different but it doesn't sound like it is. Let me break this down for you: your friends are not and should not be considered friends if they don't accept you for you. Of course they will probably crack jokes sometimes, but just realize it's all in jest if they are actually your friends.
I realize this is tough as in your mind, they could laugh at you and never talk to you again, but coming clean and being yourself will be a start to beginning to solve this. Realize that if they don't care enough about you to respect your feelings, they are callous douches you probably shouldn't be friends with anyways. I think the best way to approach this is to present these ideas to a few friends who you think would be cool with it. Then present it to your friend group in total with those friends you told before there. That way, if some people are douches, your friends you told before will hopefully have your back.
As to your question about how to experiment, you didn't mention where you live, but if there is a gay scene, go party with them. The gay guys tend to flock together and they throw house parties with mostly gay dudes and their girl friends. Or go to an indie club where gays frequent. Unless you live in like Mississippi, they shouldn't be TOO hard to find. You mentioned you know of a few gay guys, or people that know of them. Talk to them and get the scoop. Guys are WAYYYYY easier to hook up with than girls. If you are remotely attractive, they will be down to hook up. Seriously, every time I go out, I get hit on and they verbatim tell me they want to fuck.  Gets me a lot of free drinks haha. Just throw back some beers and grab one, tell them "you're hot" and start making out. Unlike chicks, ZERO game is required. It that easy. If you end up going this approach, realize that you are just "trying things out." Just because you make out with or sleep with a guy, that doesn't make you gay in a super permanent, irreversible way. And if you find you like it a lot, who cares if it does?
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
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Anonymous #1
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: All We Perceive]
#16104630 - 04/18/12 01:53 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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yeah i agree with everything you've said, im goingto take your advice, hopefully all goes well
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 keyohnah
the proverbial mind spread
Registered: 10/18/10
Posts: 1,396
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: All We Perceive]
#16104857 - 04/18/12 03:07 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
All We Perceive said:
Just do what the fuck you want. If you don't want to fuck/kiss guys, don't. If you want to fuck girls, do. If you don't want to fuck anyone, don't. Just follow your inclinations. Do what the fuck you want and fuck the haters. :
This, a hundred times over.
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"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story."
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All We Perceive
Sea Cucumber
Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 7,726
Loc: colorado
Last seen: 2 days, 5 hours
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Re: sexuality. asexual. bi. gay. straight. help? [Re: Anonymous #1]
#16104883 - 04/18/12 03:15 AM (1 year, 1 month ago) |
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 Good luck dude. If you throw yourself out there, I personally feel that you'll win, at least to some extent. In other words, you'll be better off than you are now for sure.
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"plus they atually think jambands are good or sumthing, so they clearly know absolutely nothing about music, clearly lol" -Bassfreak
Edited by All We Perceive (04/18/12 03:17 AM)
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