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Anonymous #1

My lover is a senior citizen.
    #12836620 - 07/01/10 10:36 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

So, my lover is a senior citizen and lately I have been worried a lot about his eventual death.  We have been together for thirteen years.  That's a long time.  I'll be devestated without him.  I don't think I should have to be worrying about the death of my partner in my late thirties, but there it is.  At least he is healthy for now.  But death comes to us all.

We are a gay couple and we pretty much keep to ourselves.  He is a little more social and outgoing than I.  I can't say that I have any really good friends on this planet.  I'll be so alone when something happens to him.

Furthermore, I have mental health issues.  I depend on him so much.  He keeps me on track with my medicine and appointments.  He does most all of the cooking.  He keeps track of all of the utility bills.  He handles all of the maintenance on our vehicles.  I have a problem with my memory that makes it impossible for me to learn driving routes.  I drive but only to work and a few familiar places.  There are many places that I couldn't get to if it weren't for him driving me around this larger city. 

Basically, I'll be fucked when he's gone.  Emotionally speaking and also from a practical standpoint.  I've never learned to fend for myself, and I'm not sure that's even possible with my issues.  I sometimes think about it and wonder if suicide will be my only option when he's gone.


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Anonymous #2

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12836639 - 07/01/10 10:39 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

You're one of those asshole gold diggers arent you? Kind of like Anna Nicole Smith?


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Anonymous #3

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #12836686 - 07/01/10 10:45 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

:trollz:  :multicoloredfoot:  :mikemcdonald:


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Anonymous #4

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12836730 - 07/01/10 10:53 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Haters gonna hate.

OP, this is a really sad post.

Has this ever come up in conversation with him?


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Anonymous #1

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #12836734 - 07/01/10 10:54 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Well, I work and I contribute what I can.  And he's not exactly wealthy.  SO, no I don't think I'm a golddigger.  Basically, I just gave myself away in my twenties without thinking of the long term consequences.  And I don't really regret it.  But I see a rough road ahead.


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Anonymous #1

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #12836761 - 07/01/10 10:58 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #4 said:
Haters gonna hate.

OP, this is a really sad post.

Has this ever come up in conversation with him?




No.  I don't even have anyone to share my fears with.  It seems too disrespectful to talk about his death when he is doing his best to live a vibrant life.  He doesn't think about dying yet.  Maybe that's a good sign?  I don't want to be a drain on him....  I really do love him.


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Anonymous #5

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12836933 - 07/01/10 11:32 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

the OP is TTT or Kirilan


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Anonymous #2

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12836940 - 07/01/10 11:33 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

So...how's the sex?


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Anonymous #1

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #12842145 - 07/02/10 11:44 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Well, neither of us have any complaints, so I would say the sex is just fine.  Thanks for asking.


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Anonymous #6

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12842355 - 07/03/10 12:25 AM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
So, my lover is a senior citizen and lately I have been worried a lot about his eventual death.  We have been together for thirteen years.  That's a long time.  I'll be devestated without him.  I don't think I should have to be worrying about the death of my partner in my late thirties, but there it is.  At least he is healthy for now.  But death comes to us all.

We are a gay couple and we pretty much keep to ourselves.  He is a little more social and outgoing than I.  I can't say that I have any really good friends on this planet.  I'll be so alone when something happens to him.

Furthermore, I have mental health issues.  I depend on him so much.  He keeps me on track with my medicine and appointments.  He does most all of the cooking.  He keeps track of all of the utility bills.  He handles all of the maintenance on our vehicles.  I have a problem with my memory that makes it impossible for me to learn driving routes.  I drive but only to work and a few familiar places.  There are many places that I couldn't get to if it weren't for him driving me around this larger city. 

Basically, I'll be fucked when he's gone.  Emotionally speaking and also from a practical standpoint.  I've never learned to fend for myself, and I'm not sure that's even possible with my issues.  I sometimes think about it and wonder if suicide will be my only option when he's gone.





start trying to take some of those responsibilities onto yourself.  with his help.  don't do it all at once, but DO do something.

if he wonders why?  Just say that you're worried that when you're his age, he'll be gone, and you don't want to have to go through the pain of loss and having to take care of yourself like that all at once, and you figure the sooner you can handle the little things the better in the long run

maybe it'll be before then, but i doubt anyone would blink if you're just talking about them dying in their 90s.  that's not being pessimistic, that's just being realistic


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Anonymous #7

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #12843071 - 07/03/10 02:55 AM (2 years, 10 months ago)

she's fucking someone else bro


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Anonymous #8

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #12848704 - 07/04/10 08:25 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

I bet $1000 that OP is Prisoner#1


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Anonymous #1

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #12848781 - 07/04/10 08:45 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #6 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
So, my lover is a senior citizen and lately I have been worried a lot about his eventual death.  We have been together for thirteen years.  That's a long time.  I'll be devestated without him.  I don't think I should have to be worrying about the death of my partner in my late thirties, but there it is.  At least he is healthy for now.  But death comes to us all.

We are a gay couple and we pretty much keep to ourselves.  He is a little more social and outgoing than I.  I can't say that I have any really good friends on this planet.  I'll be so alone when something happens to him.

Furthermore, I have mental health issues.  I depend on him so much.  He keeps me on track with my medicine and appointments.  He does most all of the cooking.  He keeps track of all of the utility bills.  He handles all of the maintenance on our vehicles.  I have a problem with my memory that makes it impossible for me to learn driving routes.  I drive but only to work and a few familiar places.  There are many places that I couldn't get to if it weren't for him driving me around this larger city. 

Basically, I'll be fucked when he's gone.  Emotionally speaking and also from a practical standpoint.  I've never learned to fend for myself, and I'm not sure that's even possible with my issues.  I sometimes think about it and wonder if suicide will be my only option when he's gone.





start trying to take some of those responsibilities onto yourself.  with his help.  don't do it all at once, but DO do something.

if he wonders why?  Just say that you're worried that when you're his age, he'll be gone, and you don't want to have to go through the pain of loss and having to take care of yourself like that all at once, and you figure the sooner you can handle the little things the better in the long run

maybe it'll be before then, but i doubt anyone would blink if you're just talking about them dying in their 90s.  that's not being pessimistic, that's just being realistic




That's good advice about taking on more responsibility.  Much of the time I am in denial about our age difference, though.  His death is really quite hard for me to think about.  It will be hard making these changes without overwhelming myself with the logic behind them.


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Anonymous #9

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #12848890 - 07/04/10 09:11 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

How old is he?


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Anonymous #1

Re: My lover is a senior citizen. [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #12849172 - 07/04/10 10:14 PM (2 years, 10 months ago)

67.


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