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Anonymous #1
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Man, I think I missed it
#8386344 - 05/10/08 05:57 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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I really have no social skills at all. So I was at a group/meeting today and a girl asked me before the end if I was going to go "back to reading" after. I had mentioned I was reading before the event.
So is this just friendly conversation, or should I have asked her to hang out?
I immediately think no one is interested in me and I don't know how often girls would come out and take the initiative. This was also before I let on that I was still living with the folks.
I'm 21 but I look 18. I also have spent way to much time on the Internet/forums so I don't really know what is appropriate conversation on the other side, because anything goes here.
Any advice welcome that is constructive.
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beneath


Registered: 10/30/07
Posts: 883
Loc: The un-united kingdom
Last seen: 4 minutes, 35 seconds
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Re: Man, I think I missed it [Re: Anonymous #1]
#8386411 - 05/10/08 06:15 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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Stop thinking so much, just get out there and talk to people, who gives a fuck if you say something wrong or weird, you think people are going to remember one or a few more weird things you say? They probably won't.
Just start talking about something, ANYTHING, no-one is analyzing what you talking about as much as you are, everyone else.
Just talk about stuff people can respond to, ask questions, let them speak, add you thoughts on what your talking about then ask something else, conversations are fun when you stop analyzing it so much.
(I'm a shy person but but i just let it go, let it flow and it'll happen)
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grymmtymm
lostinthought


Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 570
Loc: midwest, unfortunately
Last seen: 8 hours, 7 minutes
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Re: Man, I think I missed it [Re: Anonymous #1]
#8386423 - 05/10/08 06:17 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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something to remember when you're in any situation like that
fake it til you make it....
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Anonymous #1
Unregistered
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Re: Man, I think I missed it [Re: grymmtymm]
#8386455 - 05/10/08 06:24 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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What do I fake? I really can't do something like that, it goes completely against my life framework.
I've been working on the conversation thing and I'm actually pretty mediocre now (which is good ).
It's just I have absolutely no clue on the more-than-platonic relationship thing.
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recycledsoul
Stranger

Registered: 05/06/08
Posts: 54
Last seen: 4 months, 23 days
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Re: Man, I think I missed it [Re: Anonymous #1]
#8386543 - 05/10/08 06:49 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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You know what a really intellegent person is? One who has made many mistakes. How do you expect to find out about relationships by being alone at the computer, or by asking others on the computer? Knowledge informs, experience transforms. So youre going to go approach someone and you feel wierd, and you say to yourself, dont look wierd, what will they think, this is not good. and you repress this energy thats inside you. but really just accept yourself uncodionally. and if you want to talk to others, really go and talk. whats the big deal? You could go to a festival jambase.com/festivals and meet plenty of friendly people there- just dont start abusing drugs like most of them do. Really you may not realize it but this whole thing is very egotisical. you dont even talk to us with your realy screen name because you dont want to appear to be the way you really are. I am not condemning you, i am showing you. how silly is this no? what is the point. theres no point. You sound really shy. You know thats not a bad thing. Ghandi was really shy. Maybe one day you will find a girl who appreciates your quietness, your shyness.. finally a guy who doesnt talk and talk and talk, he listens to what i say. you know, dont worry
-------------------- Listen to what the universe wants you to do, be happy
listen to what the mind wants you to do, be miserable
just be Here. Reality as it is, dont change it as you would like it to be, just observe, no repression, no expression
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grymmtymm
lostinthought


Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 570
Loc: midwest, unfortunately
Last seen: 8 hours, 7 minutes
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Re: Man, I think I missed it [Re: Anonymous #1]
#8386620 - 05/10/08 07:11 PM (6 months, 22 days ago) |
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i mean your confidence, or nervousness, or whatever....even if you don't have it act like you do until you've done it enough that you do have it...fake it til you make it....even when you are nervous and shy, act like you are not and eventually your nervousness and shyness will no longer be a problem....
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