that small fee for the evolution of the mind you say? Oh I've payed the fee, and how I wish I never really had. I mean I guess I didn't really gain anything except half a year of absolute hell. My whole life was turned upside down by three mushroom trips in 5 short days. One mushroom trip later finally my mind is operating the way I like it too, yet I tend to reflect on what I lost via those painful months of being basically the equivelant of socially/mentally retarded. All the skills I once had I had completely lost and reflecting on the way I used to be made me depressed beyond measure. However I'm alright now as I say this, but I'm still not a funnyman like I used to be. Maybe one more mushroom trip will heal me?

Anyways I enjoyed reading your report, the forums are down right now but once they become functional I'll send you the line of a post I made and I got lot's of positive feedback that you might like to read. This is a good report, very interesting.

its fun to trip by yourself huh?  its like a whole different experience.  you should have smoked weed earlier though, it would've mellowed you out some.  also, may i suggest reading a book on meditation.  and check out terrance Mckenna's guide on how to trip.  don't let this experience scare you away, you're almost there.  nothing is free, you have to pay that small fee for the evolution of the mind sometime.