Yesterday I had my first trip on shrooms. I waited for about 2 and a half years for the experience, but I was too afraid, which makes sense because tripping isn't really a walk in the park. I'll try to elaborate as much as I can about the experience, especially to help other first timers. Anyways, here's the story of my very first trip with shrooms/psychedelics.
It was about 1pm when I arrived at my friends house (we'll call him M). We didn't really put it off too much, so after we sat down and talked for a bit we decided to munch up the shrooms. Now for me this was the moment of truth. As I mentioned I've spent about 2 and a half years waiting to have the experience, and all that time was spent researching and preparing for it. It all led up to this. I tried not to spend too much time dwelling on being hesitant, I decided the best way to go through with it was to just chew them up and forget about it.
I've heard that shrooms taste pretty bad, so I only ate the shrooms bit by bit so that I wasn't gagging while I was eating them, but I still did a bit. At first they were fine, but eventually the taste set in so I had to have a drink in my mouth at the same time while I was chewing. I chewed them up well and eventually got the 1.5 grams down.
For the next little while we played Mortal Kombat waiting for the shrooms to kick in. After about 30 - 45 minutes the high started easing in. It didn't just suddenly creep up like I thought it would, it just slowly started getting stronger and stronger. M picked up his guitar and started playing some shit he knew. He started playing "Stairway To Heaven" and it was beautiful. It's not that the guitar sounded necessarily different, but it sounded more beautiful and clear. I knew it was coming on.
I started to feel a bit anxious, and a bit nauseous from the anxiety and possibly the shrooms, so I mentioned that we should go outside and start walking. I put in my headphones and started listening to the playlist I prepared for the occasion. My friend was getting ready and getting his shit together so I went out to the front room and waited for him. My music sounded pretty good, but not so much different than it normally was when I'd listen to it sober. I also looked out the big front window and it was amazing. The sun was shining bright and the sky was blue, it was incredible and I knew it would be incredible outside. When we were finally ready we started to head outside. I was definitely feeling it by this point.
We went downstairs to the garage. This tiny little garage M had tripped me the fuck out for some reason. I stepped into the garage, looked up and just stood there. It was so weird and it felt so familiar for some reason, I probably could've spent my whole trip in this wonderful little garage.
I told him how I was feeling about this place and how trippy I thought it was. He said, "You think this is trippy? Come look at this". I went over to where he was and he opened the door that leads under the stairs. It kind of looked like Harry Potter's room in the first movie, but a little bigger. This is when I experienced one of the only two noticeable hallucinations from the entire trip. I didn't really look around this "Hobbit's Hole", as he called it. I was just staring at the centre of the floor. I saw these greyish black lines expanding outwards in a diamond pattern. Like a moving drawing of a sun expelling heat waves, but in a diamond shape instead. I only looked at it for about 3 seconds, I didn't really pay much attention to it at all. Nothing else so far had caught my eye as far as visuals went, but it was cool now that I actually think about remembering it.
We returned to the garage ready to go outside. At one moment I said that it felt like we were in the back of a helicopter and we were about to skydive. M was like, "Yea!", then he hit the garage door button. When it was halfway open we both ran out of the garage like we were about to jump out of a plane. We then laughed at what we just did and went on.
When we first stepped outside the sun was crazy. I felt the warmth from it hit me and I felt so good. We started walking down the street and I was just thinking, "So this is what shrooms is like…", with a smile on my face, feeling like I was in for an adventure and I almost couldn't believe I was finally experiencing it. Me and M were just talking about random shit, and then he was like, "Yo man, wanna run?". I thought about it, and I said why not? We counted down from three and then we started sprinting around the corner. The change from walking to running felt so weird, but it was cool.
We continued walking until we reached the nearest park. M lived in a pretty large town so there were a lot of parks that we stopped at. For the first park we just passed through because there were little kids and parents around. It was also Remembrance Day so there were quite a few war veterans walking around. This was the first war vet we saw. When I saw the guy standing there, watching the kids in his uniform and wearing a poppy, I felt tears coming to my eyes but it wasn't enough for me to actually cry. I just started thinking about all the people who had to experience war, and the ones that made it back would probably feel so thankful and proud. It was a pretty emotional moment.
As we continued walking I started getting annoyed. I felt good, but M was kind of bringing me down. He kept telling me how awesome he felt, but at the same time he kept putting me down. He kept saying shit like, "You look like my retarded friend right now", "You look like faggot", and, "Why are you walking like that? Try to look normal". It was pretty annoying, I was just trying to enjoy myself and for the whole trip I really didn't give a fuck about if people saw me acting strange or thought I was weird. If anything they maybe would have thought I was stoned but I wasn't doing anything I wouldn't normally do.
We kept walking and eventually we reached the next park, which was empty. We sat on the bench for a while just chillin' out. This is when I had my second hallucination of the trip. I looked up at the clouds and they were kind of moving and waving around a little bit, it was pretty cool but it wasn't very vivid/noticeable at all. I thought that maybe there were high speed winds up in the sky blowing the clouds and making them move, and that maybe could have been it, but I'll never really know what it was.
We went on the swings, but it was intense for me because I started feeling nauseous from all the movement, so I stopped. M then when on this "spinny thing" (that's what we called it), and I spun him around really fast. He was having a good time and as I was spinning it faster it got too fast for me so I couldn't grab the bars to spin it anymore. M laughed at this and so did I. We then got bored of this park and continued walking.
By this point (earlier on actually) I was feeling a weird and crazy body high. Being sober now it's very difficult to explain it, but I'll do my best. I felt very heavy and stiff, but my body also felt really nice and it felt good when I touched my legs. I also felt pretty out of it and woozy in my head, but I wasn't lightheaded or anything like that. It's pretty hard to explain. You know when your body feels exhausted like you walked around a theme park all day? It felt like that, but in a good way. I don't know lol. It's very hard to describe.
M was thirsty so we stopped at the Mac's that was nearby. As we walked into the parking lot M was telling me that he felt like we were in the movie Superbad, the part where they are standing outside the liquor store and Seth and McLovin' are fighting. I kind of saw what he meant and I laughed a bit.
We entered Mac's and it was pretty crazy. M went over and got an energy drink, then we approached the counter and picked up some gum too. There was an old man in front of us buying smokes and it felt like I was standing in line for 5 minutes! It took this guy a really long time to buy smokes. Now, I'm not actually entirely sure if it actually took as long as I thought it did, maybe I was tripping pretty hard, but it definitely felt like a long time. Then M went up to the counter to buy all his shit, and he encountered some trouble when his debit card was rejected, but it wasn't me going through that so I really didn't worry about it at all for my sake. I was too busy feeling spaced out and staring at one spot. The whole time standing in this line my body high was getting more and more intense. I remember just standing there swaying back and forth a little bit because it felt good for some reason, and I was staring at the floor spacing out the whole time.
We left Mac's and continued down Main Street. M told me that we should go to his friends house to pick up his iPod, so he texted him and we started that journey. We started talking and M mentioned that we were at the peak at that moment, and after experiencing what I did in Mac's, this seemed pretty obvious to me. We continued walking until we stopped on a trail outside a private school. M was basically talking about random shit, slurring a bit, and laughing a lot at this point. He took about 2 grams so I don't know how he was so much more fucked up than me, but drugs affect everyone differently, so I never said anything.
We continued walking around. I was trying to pay attention to my music for a little bit but M just kept talking and talking and I felt like if I didn't listen or respond he'd feel like I was annoyed with him. Even though I wanted to stay to myself for just a few minutes, he'd interrupt me and my thoughts and my music, so I decided to pay more attention to what he was talking about. But, by doing this I kept fiddling with my iPod which was annoying as fuck. I'd turn my volume up, then I'd here M saying some shit, so I'd have to turn the music back down, and this repeated for a while until I said fuck it and kept it at a lower level mostly.
As we were walking around this section of town we were looking at all the big rich people houses and we were just astonished at how nice they were and how people could afford theses houses. This was the part of the trip where I started to open up. From the beginning I tried to keep to myself most of the time, barely talking. Maybe it was because it was my first experience and it was feeling a bit intense, but I'm also naturally attached to myself more than I am social. I also wanted to pay attention to the experience, and me, and how I was feeling so I could recognize the effects. Anyways, as we kept walking around we just started to tell funny stories and laugh about shit.
By this point M needed to pee REALLY badly. It was that feeling where your whole mind is taken over by finding a bathroom because you need to pee so bad. So we went around to find a place where he could piss. He suggested the library that was nearby so we made that our set destination. I could tell he really needed to go because it's all he could talk about and he was walking like 2 metres in front of me because he was walking so fast lol.
I turned my music up again because a really good song came on, "Swingish" by Infected Mushroom. The bass groove at the start kicked in and I felt so sick. I was walking with a bit of swagger, bobbing my head, I just felt so awesome but the feeling faded after a while. I felt awesome and euphoric again when the major build-up in the middle of the song came in. It was fantastic.
We made it to the library and realized it was closed, and our hopes were let down. For him probably because he needed to piss really badly, but for me because I was so looking forward to it. My legs were exhausted from walking for the past 2 hours and the thought of curling up in a comfy chair in a warm library sounded incredible, but unfortunately we couldn't go there, so we headed off again.
I kept telling M to just piss in a tree or something, but he was too self-conscious. I was confused by this. I didn't know why he cared so much about people and what they thought. The whole trip I had a mind state that was like I don't give a fuck about anyone else in this world right now, this trip and this day is about me. We came to the third park which we thought he could finally piss at, but there ended up being people that could see him. I told him to go piss somewhere because I wanted to stay and sit on the play structure because I was tired of walking, but he insisted that he needed a better place, so we were off again.
The trip so far was pretty cool, nothing too overwhelming, but it was about to get a lot better. We were walking down the street talking about more random shit and then we came near M's childhood home. He started reminiscing about his old house and our childhood and stuff, it was awesome. We then came to a trail where M FINALLY took a piss.
After he pissed we were trying to figure out where to go. Off the side of the trail there was an awesome forest, so I suggested that we should just rest there. We walked a few metres through the forest and found a nice fallen tree to sit on. We weren't far enough in to hide ourselves from people, but we didn't care at all if people passed by and saw us or not.
Once we sat down we really opened up to each other. We talked about things like life and space, what it'll be like to be older and living our own lives with our own careers in our own homes. We talked about drugs and friendships and a bunch of other stuff. It was incredible, and it really reminded me of MDMA, how I could just open up and say anything and not care what anyone else though about it.
By this point we were coming down. I suddenly started feeling extreme nausea, so I got up off the tree and walked around a little bit and felt better. We decided to go to Broadways to get some food. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to stomach food because I wasn't feeling all that hungry, but we had nowhere else to go and nothing else to do so we headed to the restaurant.
On the way back we kept talking to each other and it felt pretty good. We stopped to sit on a bench at a bus stop because the sky was too beautiful. It was at the point where the sun was almost down, and it made the sky look pink and orange, it was amazing. After sitting and looking at the sky for about 5 - 10 minutes we continued on.
When we got to Broadways and sat in our booth we felt incredible. Like this huge journey was now ending and we felt very relaxed, like the whole thing was a success. I was sitting there and all I could do was move around in different positions and lie my head on the table while saying, "Awwee fuck man! I feel amazing now". The waitress came up and asked for our drink orders. M said Root Beer casually, she then turned to me and I was just staring right up at her with huge pupils and I said, "……….Waaater!……", with such an innocent look on my face like a little kid. The waitress left and M started laughing and he told me what I just did because I wasn't so aware of it. We laughed about it for a while, it was definitely one the of the top memories from the trip.
This was it. The experience was ending. I just finished the last song on my playlist and finally took my earphones out. Clarity. I could experience every emotion, which is difficult for me in sobriety, and I could do it on demand. Most of the time I was either really happy or feeling bittersweet, like sadness with a happy glow to it. Also, my body high lightened up, and instead of feeling heavy and weird, I felt light and relaxed. My body had a minor tingle to it. It's like that feeling that you get when you were just driving in a car for a couple of hours, then when you get home and lie on your bed you just feel so good? That's what it was like. I had some anxiety at times still which was weird, but other than that I felt better than I've ever felt in a long time.
Me and M ordered our food and began to talk about deep stuff, even deeper than the stuff we were talking about back in the forest. We were honest, and had pretty interesting topics to talk about. It made me feel bad for the people who have never experienced this feeling. I felt like I was having a real conversation with a person, rather than the same cheap small talk that's tossed around on a day to day basis. I rarely ever have someone to have heart to hearts with so whenever I have one with someone I can get really emotional about it, and I tend to miss those experiences after being sober for a while, so far away from it.
We ate our food and left the restaurant, ready to walk back to M's house to crash. On the way back we walked on a lot of the same streets. So when we met up with the closest place to where we were tripping earlier, we followed it all the way back to M's house, reliving the experience backwards and reflecting on each others individual experiences.
We got back to M's house and went through the garage. I wanted to stay in there for a couple of minutes just to relive the beginning of the trip. I loved that garage and I feel like I have a deep connection with that garage now. I know that sounds weird, but it gave me a very strange feeling that you wouldn't expect to have a garage give you……………LOL!
We walked inside and it felt like I was home. After all that walking we did, it was so nice to be home after the long journey so we could sit on a nice comfy couch and crash on it. After we left Mac's I kept repeatedly having one thought on my mind through the trip, and it was, "I wish we could find a place, with a nice, big comfortable bed to curl up in ball and rest in". It wasn't a thought loop, it just kept coming up every 20 minutes or so, but it's not like it was a bad thought so I never worried about it. It wasn't a comfy bed that I got, but a couch was the next best thing at least.
I was satisfied about the day, and the trip I had. Sure, the beginning was a little strange and foreign, but I survived through it, and most importantly I didn't have anything throw me into a state of being scared. Not even my anxiety gave me a bad trip. I sometimes had a wave of anxiety or intensity that would worry me a little bit, but I went with the flow of the trip and whenever something became difficult, I tried to change scenery and and usually it would work out.
A downside of the trip was my tripping buddy, M. How he was putting me down, talking all the time, and being weird the entire trip affected my trip. But, he did take a higher dose than me, so he probably couldn't help it I guess. I just feel like I could have had better company around, or maybe I could be by myself?
Also, I had this with MDMA but I didn't expect that I'd have it with shrooms. It was a feeling of discomfort. A feeling of never being satisfied, at least not until Broadways. For example, I would being feeling strange or nauseous so I'd think chewing gum would help. It helps for a bit, then the next minute I'm thinking, I hate this gum I should probably spit it out and drink water instead. Or when I was walking for a while I wanted to sit down, and when I finally find a good spot to sit down I feel like walking again.
I also felt nauseous at times, and usually it was later in the trip rather than in the beginning. The last uncomfortable nausea I felt was in Broadways when I saw my food being brought to me, and that was 4 hours after ingestion.
The anxiety threw me off a bit too. Whenever my body would feel too intense my anxiety kicked in, and when that happened it started throwing off my tripping sanity. I could usually forget about it with a change of scenery or something good for me, like sitting down or drinking water. I just wish I didn't have it repeatedly through the trip, but what are you gonna do when you have anxiety issues right?
I would definitely do shrooms again, I might take more or I might take the same dose. I feel like I handled the trip well in my own opinion, but I still struggled with things like the foreign mindset and crazy weird body high. Hopefully I can get used to the body buzz with more experience, because it's bad, but it's not the greatest feeling ever. But I already miss the experience. The craziness of it all. The strong emotions I felt coming down. I can only feel sad now because I can't experience the emotion and clarity as well as I could with shrooms, and it's a shame that we need drugs to feel things like that so strongly. I've even found it difficult to feel the same as I did on the comedown. I've found integrating what I learned and how I felt in those moments of the trip difficult to bring back with me into my sober life, which sucks. But I can always do this again, with experience, and have an even better trip in the future. Until then I guess...
I love shrooms and I love the shroomery. Peace out and good vibes for your future experiences, and mine!