Height: 5’ 8”
Weight: 120 lbs
Taken: 2 grams in tea
My only
hope for this trip report is that at least one inexperienced individual in
regards to psychedelics will read it and take the leap of faith that first or
second or maybe even third trip requires. There is always nervousness and
wondering whether it’s really worth it to try mushrooms, and I would just hope
that question will be answered with an affirmative, “Yes. It most certainly
is.” This was my fifth mushroom trip, and the most meaningful psychedelic
experience I have ever had.
Being an artist, I had been looking
to trip for some time to find inspiration after a particularly influential trip
about six months ago. Two failed attempts, a bad trip and a weak one, had
already gotten me discouraged about the likelihood of much of anything positive
happening again, and I was beginning to doubt that mushrooms were for me after
all. Over the preceding weeks I had become greatly discouraged about my
sketcher’s block (inability to draw for no apparent reason) I had been
experiencing, and set out with the hope to search inside myself during this
trip and find the cause of my diminishing skill and solve it.
We decided to wake up at 4:00 AM,
all but one of us having spent the night at R’s house. J, the only missing
member of our party ended up not being able to come, and after the brief
setback of trying to get in contact with him, we took our mushrooms, R and I
drinking the 5 gram potency tea I had prepared the night before, me drinking 2
grams worth and R 3, while A and Z ate theirs, both 3 grams worth. While Z and
I lay inside, A and R walked outside to the backyard to watch the sun rise. Z
was a little disappointed that he didn’t feel the effects at first because the
rest of us had begun to trip already. Although I drank the tea slowly, I began
to feel the effects quickly and strongly. Laying down on the couch, listening
to MGMT’s Kids, I started seeing the
most amazing visuals. Every instrumental sound had its own embodiment as one of
many various cartoon foxes cut out of bright colored construction paper dancing
to the beat, though I hadn’t really realized how hard I was tripping until, at
the end of the very upbeat sounding song, when a drum interlude broke off a
draining solo back to the powerful, emotional chorus, and I looked over at the
kitchen which had now turned every shade of red, orange, and yellow. Suddenly,
as if I was in the bottom of a cup having soft-serve frozen yogurt poured into
it, the kitchen blended together in a saturated swirl of warm colors, I was
rapidly plunged into a tunnel of beautiful sound and color. I had never had open-eye
visuals this vivid before, where I was not able to see any of my surroundings,
so, a little startled, I hopped off the couch, taking off my headphones, and
instantly the hallucinations subdued. I walked outside to join my friends, and
truly realized for the first time why psychedelics and nature come hand in hand
for most people. I lay down with my friends, Z following me, on the blankets
and stared up at the lime green, kite-shaped leaves of a large oak tree in
front of the purplish-red sunrise in awe. It looked as if the leaves were just
small teeth in the gears of the large clockwork contraption the tree had
become, all twirling and vibrating in unison. As I turned my gaze to a small
gathering of shrubs and trees overhanging a small clubhouse R had made as a
kid, illuminated by the beautiful sunrise which was now a deep pthalo blue, I
gasped. I had never seen anything this spectacular in my life. The beauty was
stunning. So many hues, all so impeccably saturated, it was amazing. Everything
seemed to glow with some powerful electricity. Every object’s energy was
visible and breathtaking.
A good deal of time passed, and Z
had gone back inside to eat something while R and I lay outside talking.
Suddenly, Z burst from the house laughing hysterically, yogurt in his beard,
gesturing towards the spoonful of yogurt he held in his other hand as if it
said something hilarious we had all just missed. I began to laugh painfully
hard, as well. All these good vibes got me in the most uncontrollable state of
euphoria I had ever felt, which lasted for the rest of my trip. I spent much of
the trip just giggling and jumping up and down and biting my sketchbook to control
my urge to yell out, “I LOVE MUSHROOMS SO FUCKING MUCH!”
Now that we were all tripping
fairly hard, we resolved to take a walk to a nearby donut shop for breakfast…
barefoot. We were all so in-tune with nature that we did not feel it would be
respectful of us to wear shoes, or even keep our phones and iPods with us. It
even went so far that when I developed a rather painful, persistent headache, I
refused to take aspirin or any other type of medication, because drinking water
was the way nature preferred me to deal with my ailments (lol). I find it very
interesting, looking back on this trip, that while I was tripping too hard to
understand what I was saying at some points—something that had scared me quite
a bit a few trips before—I was not frightened at all. It was more just amusing
and caused more giggling.
We set out down R’s street, all
absolutely ecstatic and laughing our heads off, having conversations about how
the world is so consumed with its pathetic routine while we were so carefree
and content with just a summer morning spent on hallucinogens. When a nice BMW
came roaring down the street with the license plate, “IM A BMR,” A yelled after
it, “Yeah, you’re a Beamer! And that’s all you’ll ever be! That’s all your life
is worth!” and I followed, “Hurry! Gotta get to work! You’ll be late to cheat
on your wife with your secretary and cower to your boss!” We all laughed
hysterically and were pleased beyond imagination with our current situation. I
turned back to ask Z a question and noticed he was about 20 feet behind us
staring at a large flower we had passed in someone’s lawn. I couldn’t stop
laughing as I yelled to him to catch up. He briskly walked about 10 feet, and
then paused, looking at the street as if an idea occurred to him. He crouched down
in the middle of the road holding up a finger for us to wait while he stared
down the road in the other direction. He later explained that he was able to
see the Earth’s curvature bending in all directions around him and thought he
was at a point of great significance on the planet. Meanwhile, R had become
greatly amused with a telephone pole and all the nails stuck in it.
We ran across the 6 lanes of street
we had to cross to get to the donut shop, pausing on the median for Z who was
lagging behind again. When he caught up with us, I absent-mindedly turned and
began to step into the road, only to be stopped by R screaming and pulling me
back from walking directly into the rather thick flow of traffic coming that
way. I didn’t think anything of the fact that I almost died, though. I just
thought it was funny and started thinking about how fragile life was and how
secure humans are in their existence.
We arrived
at the donut shop, and after a bit of confusion between the Korean cashier who
spoke little to no English and A, who was tripping his balls off, we set out to
cross another street to the most beautiful park I have ever gone to. For a Texas summer morning, it
was surprisingly brisk and refreshing. After sitting at a picnic table to rest,
I tried to eat my one Kolache A had bought me, but after taking a bite and
realizing I couldn’t swallow, I said, “You get back in the bag.” and giggling,
I spit the bite back in and discarded the food in a trash can. R had to use the
restroom, so he ran off to the woods, and Z, A, and I walked off to a beautiful
clearing. The sky, aside from some clouds, was such a vibrant blue, and the
wet, bright greens of the dew covered grass and trees seemed to greet it in a
caring, supporting way. Z offered us all Djarum Blacks, my favorite cigarette,
but I didn’t feel it would be appropriate to smoke them in such a pure state of
existence. I wanted nothing affecting my brain but these godly shrooms. It was
then that I looked up and saw one of the most awe-inspiring sights of my trip.
The sun was now shining on some enormous, fluffy clouds, turning their
bluish-grey color golden-white on the top and one side. I really believe I saw
heaven. If I were to die and go to a state of eternal bliss, I would ask for
nothing more but to reside in one of those clouds. My breath taken away, I went
off and sat down in a dried-up creek bed, watching two squirrels frolicking in
the trees. The brown trees, leaves, and dirt seemed to adopt a deep red glow
seeping through their cracks. R appeared after a bit, saying he got sidetracked
and just sat down in the woods for awhile. R began to draw, and I watched,
astounded. I have always loved his art, and he is my biggest source of
inspiration, I suppose. I was a little discouraged, and I think he noticed,
because he told me to start drawing. I tried to explain again that I was having
a lot of trouble lately, and for some reason I was blocked. He then told me,
“Just draw. It doesn’t matter how it looks or what it is. It doesn’t matter
whether you like it or not. Just draw. Isn’t that what you want?” I paused,
thinking about the advice I had just heard. It clicked. I looked up, grinning.
“I broke it,” I said. I was so incredibly happy. R just laughed and went back
to drawing. I got out my sketchbook and began to draw, the ideas flowing from
my pencil in a way I had not felt in weeks. We all had some amazing
conversations, about how much we appreciated each other as friends, and how
great it was we were able to share this experience. We all laughed our asses off
when I pointed out a conversation that had been going on for a few minutes that
consisted of not much more than pronouns and prepositions (“It’s just that is
like that, and this is just…. It. This is what it is. That’s nothing. Etc.”)
We returned
to R’s house after a bit longer at the park, and put on Homogenic by
Bjork. Everyone else there likes her quite a bit, but it was the first time I
had ever heard her. I lay on R’s parents’ waterbed listening to Joga, and I truly thought her voice was
the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I was coming down by now, and had to
go to a dentist appointment, and as I reflected on my trip, thinking about how
I had accomplished my goal of breaking my sketcher’s block, as well as so much
more, all I could do was smile. “I knew there was a reason I kept trying to do
shrooms after the bad trips,” I commented to A. He laughed.
If there is
any doubt in your mind about whether or not you should try mushrooms, let this
trip report be all the motivation you need. I cannot express greatly enough to
you the sense of elation and well-being I felt that morning. I am closer to
each of those friends now because of it, and I solved a quite depressing
problem in my life. Of course, we had about the best set and setting you could
ask for, and not every trip is this good, but with the right environment and
mindset, you will be astounded with what your brain can achieve under the
influence of psilocybin.
Sorry about
the length, but there were just so many parts I felt I needed to include. Happy
tripping, and good luck.
